There are several types of college relationships that have an urban legend-esque feel to them: the sexy school girl and the married professor, the sexy school girl and the teaching assistant, and, of course, the sexy school girl and the resident assistant.

I have never hooked up with one of my RAs, but that’s because I’ve only ever had female RA’s. Still, I know plenty of people who have dabbled in these waters. I’m not here to condone or condemn the practice, because I’ve certainly had my fair share of regrettable trysts, but I am here to lay out some of the baggage that comes with such a hook up.

First of all, consider the fact that even inter-floor mating can lead to year-long awkwardness. If you fear the inevitable walk of shame, imagine the anxiety that comes with the chance that one of your floormates sees you leaving the RA’s room in last night’s bar clothes. Even if you survive the W.O.S, you risk the rumors and reputation — people are more apt to label someone “the girl that banged the RA” than “the chick who nailed whatshisname in 5B.” Even worse, if you can’t handle the tension of a chance meeting on the elevator (or on the way to the showers), you are biting off more than you can chew with by shacking up with your RA.

Your RA is someone you will probably have to turn to throughout the year. He’ll be the one to let you into your room when you are locked out wearing only a towel. This means he also has the master key to your room (not implying anything, just saying). He’s also someone who will have to keep tabs on you throughout the year. He’ll be writing you up for dorm parties, open containers, and that hole in your wall that you forgot to fix before move-out day. This fact alone can open up a brand new can of worms in Relationship Land.

If he feels insecure about the hook-up, there’s a chance he goes on a power trip to get even. I’m not saying all RA’s are scumbags, but it’s a possibility. There’s also the possibility that you feel insecure, and blow things out of proportion: Is he writing me up because I never called him again? Yet another possibility is that you are overly confident: He won’t write me up, because I slipped him some poon, and end up getting yourself into trouble by thinking dorm rules don’t apply to you.

If you do get busted by your RA after having (or continuing to have) a relationship with him, it makes him doing his job more personal as well. Maybe he stops by to say hello and notices a box of Franzia on your desk on your “dry” floor. He puts his job first and makes you pour it out and writes you up. Do you really want any more emotions stacked on top of the pain of losing all of that perfectly good alcohol?

On the other hand, RA’s are people too. Many of them sign up to save money on housing– and I think saving money in college is something we can all relate to. I’ve known some really cool RA’s in the past, and some of them are so laid back, you don’t even realize that technically, they are in charge of the floor. If there is a real connection between you and your RA, who’s to say it can’t work out? Besides, he’ll most likely have a single (a rarity in dormland), so you won’t have to worry about a roommate barging in. In that case, I recommend having an adult conversation and weighing the pros and cons of pursuing your feelings, or even looking into swapping floors for future semesters. You might also want to find out if he has a reputation for seducing his advisees Van-Wilder-Style before you get in too deep.

In my experience (or my friends’ experiences, rather), the RA hookup is a bad idea. There are plenty of other fellas on campus to make regrets out of, so why make a mistake with someone who is pretty much in charge of your living quarters? Still, it’s always best to trust your intuition, and see where that takes you.

For the record, I also don’t advise going shot for shot in a foreign country with your orientation leader, but that’s a whole new set of wisdom.

In college, tradition is everything and there is no tradition more important, more long-lasting and more talked about than hooking up with the college freshman.

I can’t tell you how many times I watched my friends drool over the freshman girls walking in and out of the dorms. They plotted, they schemed and they visited frat parties in an effort to woo the ladies girls back to their filthy apartments.

But, why?!

What is it about this group of girls that is so appealing? And why, with so many awesome ladies already roaming around campus, do guys feel the need to “hit that sh*t”?

Let’s find out:

He Said:

It’s the beginning of the new school year, and you know what that means—hot freshman tail to chase! At least that’s what us upperclassmen guys think of when we start the new semester.

With droves of 18-year-old hotties filling in the ranks, hooking up with as many of them as possible becomes a matter of intense interest for returning dudes. But why freshmen?

First, because they’re new to the scene, they don’t know if you’re a loser or not. They’ve just come from who knows where, fresh into the world of “adulthood” (if you count being in college as adulthood), and you can tell them pretty much anything (within reason) without them knowing any better.

Second, because chicks often prefer to date older dudes, your position as an upperclassman automatically gives you the illusion of being wiser–or at least more experienced, which translates into attractiveness. You already know where to find your classes, where the best bars are in town, which parties are must-go-to’s, etc… so taking a freshman chick under your wing is as simple as shotgunning a beer. Or at least it’s easier than trying to convince someone who already knows you that you’re worth their while.

Lastly, it’s a matter of male pride. Despite what the reality is, freshmen seem strangely young an innocent when they first arrive, untainted by the harsh realities of the “real world”–or at least the party scene. So all guys want to scoop up the newly arrived babes before all their dirty, rotten classmates get to them first and ruin all the fun. Remember, it’s only a matter of time before these nubile newbies have a reputation too.

She Said:

When I was a freshman I believed anything and everything people told me and I would do anything to get into the coolest frat party in town (which were never really that cool anyway). Knowing that, I can totally see why guys are always flocking to the freshmen. It is easy prey.

But that doesn’t negate the fact that it is totally scummy and disgusting. How guys can sit on their raunchy futons and celebrate the naivety of the freshman (and their desire to bone one) and take pride in it is beyond me. Also, how they can even touch the futon blows my mind.

Think about it: the only difference between a freshman and anyone else on campus is the fact that they are new, “pure,” and young. When a guy goes after one, then, he is not doing it because he thinks she is cute or smart or wonderful; he thinks she is young, naïve and will take off her pants without a problem.Very mature, boys.

It is not that I am opposed to hooking up with a freshman – some of them are pretty effing hot and I always thought it would be fun to head back to the dorms for a little twin-extra-long action (you know, for old times’ sake) – but I am against hooking up with a freshman simply because they are one. Well, that the fact that I prefer older men…who know what they are doing below the belt.

Freshmen are nothing more to me than the new kids on campus who are walking around in packs, puking from their inability to handle their alcohol and stealing all the older guys on campus.

Let’s face it: We LOVE to gossip. We gossip about friends and we gossip about foes. Such idle talk allows us to convey information quickly, although not always accurately. This being said, it is no surprise that the website Juicy Campus has been increasing in popularity since it was founded on August 1, 2007.

When my friends first introduced me to Juicy Campus, I wrote it off as another place for people to share their college exploits online. But I quickly realized that this site was different; I actually knew the people that were being discussed! Friends, classmates, hookups—no one was free from the wrath of this critical group. Let’s just put it this way, if the “Burn Book” from Mean Girls was published online for all to see and comment on, I would imagine it would look similar to Juicy Campus.

The site was created by Mark Ivester, a Duke University Alum, with “the simple mission of enabling online anonymous free speech on college campuses.” (Editor’s Note: That’s a nice way to refer to sh*t talking!) There are currently 64 colleges listed on the site, including many prestigious institutions such as Harvard, UPenn, and Brown. The topics on the site range from the innocent (“Best Frat on Campus”) to the scandalous (“Sex with Professors”). Each post gets a rating ranging from 0% Juicy to 100% Juicy, so the juicier the gossip, the better the rating.

And because everything posted on Juicy Campus is anonymous, people have no censor when it comes to describing how they truly feel about someone. As a result, degrading, racist, homophobic, and downright hurtful remarks are prevalent throughout the site.

As guilty as I feel reading through the posts, I often find myself deciding to read “just one more.” I mean, who doesn’t want to know if she is considered the hottest girl on campus? But sometimes this curiosity gets people into trouble, as was the case here when a junior at Baylor University found her name not under “Hottest Girl,” but rather under “Biggest Slut.”

The embarrassment doesn’t end here. A couple of my own friends have been named on the site (yes, first and last name) saying they are “easy” or “ugly” when I know that it is simply not true. Furthermore, I have encountered posts where people comment on another person’s genitals (one of which referred to a guy that I had been seeing—kind of sucked) or even post naked pictures of an ex in retaliation. I don’t know about you, but I would be mortified.

The site takes no responsibility for the information posted, claiming that the authors are the ones responsible. In fact, as shown on CNN, people who have been hurt by the website have no way to fight back. Kind of hard to place the blame on Mr. Anonymous, wouldn’t you agree?

So we are left with one question: Is Juicy Campus just a fun place where college students can dish out the dirt on their friends and classmates, or has it become a way for people to tarnish the reputation of others with no repercussions?

[Photo courtesy of NYTimes.com]

The enigmatic anonymity that the web provides was a big green light for mean teenagers to harass other mean teenagers without the consequences of face-to-face confrontations. And it was this online shield that facilitated the worst culprit behind my pubescent angst: the fake screenname.

Fake screennames were the best way to tear your enemy (or popular best friend) apart incognito. You could lash out ruthlessly, ruin lives and then delete said screenname without being linked to any of the drama that would surely ensue.

I will never forget my most potent digital nemesis: ClawYourEyesOut. ClawYourEyesOut not only harassed me on a nightly basis with the unoriginal “slut,” “bitch” name-calling. He/she also IMed my adorable little boyfriend Brad and my bitchy, gullible friends and spread nasty rumors which quickly turned them against me.

And even though ClawYourEyesOut brutally defamed my reputation, there was nothing I could do about it. To this day, ClawYourEyesOut’s identity still eludes me.

But thanks to two female Yale Law School grads—who suffered a magnified version of my ClawYourEyesOut saga, online anonymity may not be such an impenetrable issue in the future.

The two women are trying to uncover the identity of 28 pseudonyms behind discussion board posts that spread rumors about their academic records, sexuality and even threatened rape.

The anonymous statements—which MSNBC dubbed “digital graffiti”—were posted on AutoAdmit, a law-school discussion site where employers can dig up the dirt on prospective employees. This being the case, the libelous remarks cost the two women legal internships and job opportunities.

Had these defamatory statements been published online by a known person, the women would have a strong case since the libel laws which hold newspapers accountable for defamation of character extend to the blogosphere. However, since you can’t sue a pseudonym (ie: Erica Segal vs. SexyKitten143), these women are trying to unearth the identities behind the posts.

They are suing the website’s manager—who denied their request to remove the defamatory posts—in hopes of subpoenaing information about the anonymous posters (ie: what computers the posts came from…so anyone who posted from Starbucks lucked out).

If the women win this case, victims of anonymous online defamation and harmful unwanted attention—like Allison Stokke—may be able to uncover the living, breathing humans behind the name-calling keyboards.

Who knows… if I can prove that ClawYourEyesOut caused me serious emotional distress, maybe I can subpoena his/her identity and finally get some closure (read: seek revenge).