Yup, that's what $18,000 worth of Elvis hair looks like.

I’ve sold a few items on eBay, and it’s truly wild what people will buy these days (although no one wanted my used retainer… strange). Recently, a clump of Elvis’s hair sold for $18,000 at an auction in Chicago. I don’t know how I feel about this. Someone just legitimately purchased old hair follicles and dandruff for the price of a small car. This got me thinking:

What other celebrity items would make a killing on the auction block?

You know what would make a good centerpiece at the dinner table? Michael Phelps’ bong. Stick a few flowers in it and call it a vase. I mean, that’s what he was using it for, wasn’t it? Better yet, MP should put some of those luscious speed suits up on Ebay. Who wouldn’t pay a pretty penny to get that up close and personal with his junk?

And what about the prosthetic vampire teeth Robert Pattinson wears in Twilight. I bet some young pre-teen would crack open her piggy bank for that item. Used, of course. Perhaps we should add them to our New Moon gift basket. Talk about a good addition to your Halloween costume. Famous fangs!

And Lord knows Amy Winehouse has a ton of stuff to sell (to pay for her daily dose of horse tranquilizers, of course):

Amy Winehouse’s hair extensions – $50
Crack pipe – $100
I just wonder what she could get for that last shred of dignity. It’s simply priceless. Read More »

Max weight loss FAST! Melt away belly fat! Lose 30 pounds in 30 days by eating more and exercising less! The Womanizer Diet: Get slim like Britney!

Unless your diet method of choice is a hearty bump of Adderall for breakfast, lunch, dinner, and midnight snack, getting/staying trim is not that easy; however, it’s also not rocket science. As a long time devotee to the business of taking care of my body, I have fully explored the spectrum of ways to stay feeling good about my body (that includes eating disorders, which is, helpful hint, not recommended.), and I found that by putting the suggestions I’ve listed below into practice, I actually lost weight in college and have kept it off since, without the aid of prescription amphetamines.

So suck on that, Britney. Read More »

It’s Barack O’MANIA!!

George Clooney’s inner dialogue

You know, sometimes I wonder what Amy Winehouse’s thoughts would sound like

Living Lohan preview. ‘Nough said.

SO. READY. FOR. INDIANA JONES.

Celebrity couples update: because I’m totally alone

Beer Pong 2.0–Gawker vs. CollegeHumor vs Facebook

I love everything that Richard Simmons stands for

Protect your banana–and tell your boyfriend to do the same!

John Mayer + Perez Hilton = oddly intriguing

Pee like a dude…virtually

I hope ScarJo’s album is better than its cover

Wait no more to see your Johnny Depp lovechild

Bobby Brown: still crazy

The mother of all ‘yo mama’ jokes

Richard Simmons is amazing

Another reason I hate happy couples

Jeff Goldblum thinks you should buy a Mac

Would you let Obama call you sweetie?