My freshman year of college I knew someone who’s ringtone was When I Grow Up by The Pussycat Dolls.  Basically the whole “I want to have groupies” vs. “boobies” debate was sparked in my mind every time this girl received a damn phone call. Not only was I plagued with that ordeal but also I find the song down right annoying. And of course, her phone would always be on loud.

Sometimes, people make questionable ringtone choices. Our friends at Lovelyish took a moment to recall embarrassing ringtones of yore, but let’s do one better.

Here is a foolproof plan to selecting a ringtone you will be proud of, not one that will provide your friends with ammo to write about your lame choices on a blog for everyone to read.

1. Classics>Current Hits: If you love the song and it’s five years later, it’s probably pretty awesome. You’ll get sick of the current chart topper (if someone plays Give Me Everything one more time…) but if the jam has already endured the test of time and you’re still loving it, I promise it’s a keeper.

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When I don’t have my cell phone on me throughout the day, I feel naked. Truly.

During college, if I ever forgot it back at my sorority house after heading out for the day, I would somehow find a way to sprint back and get it in between classes. I was so sure I would miss the call of a lifetime during that 9 am – 10:20 am time period.

Usually, I didn’t.

Well, this addiction causes me to have frequent instances where I can swear I hear it ringing, but when I would reach into my bag and take a look, it is totally silent.

No missed calls, no new text messages, no new picture messages. What is this weird thing that I was hearing?

Am I going crazy?

Nope, just suffering from a case of Ringxiety. And yes, it is a real thing, and there has now been a study done to back it up.

According to a recent news report, “A new study found that two thirds of the people surveyed reported hearing their phone ring or feeling it vibrate when it had not actually rung. The phenomenon has been termed ringxiety…The more frequently a person uses their phone, the more often they reported hearing a phantom ring, the study found. These participants (67% of the people surveyed) had higher monthly charges, used more minutes, sent more text messages, and showed higher levels of impulsivity.” Read More »

So by now you’ve read or at least heard of the two books He’s Just Not That Into You and It’s Called a Breakup Because It’s Broken. Well one of the authors, Greg Behrendt, has some hilariously funny downloadable ringtones on his personal website. These are no ordinary ringtones…they’re meant to be set in your phone as the personal ringtone for that special a-hole that you KNOW is bad for you but you can’t seem to shake.

My personal favorite is called “Booty Call” and it’s a recording of Greg singing “Guess who’s drunk and phoning again, it’s me, it’s me…guess who’s drunk and phoning again at quarter to three…AM…in the morning…don’t do it! It’s a booty call! Don’t do it…”

Then there’s also “Let It Go to Voicemail” and “Delete It.” Perfect for when you know you need some extra reassurance as to why you shouldn’t pick up when that phone starts ringing and you know the person calling is B-A-D bad news. Shear genius.