You’re in the thick of it now.  The dreary time after fall foliage and before festive February threats of snow days (that, of course, rarely come to fruition).  The sky’s gray, the grass is brown, and it’s really effing cold out there.  I know the temptation is there to hide away under your coziest comforter with the first season of The Vampire Diaries on DVD, getting up only to run to the bathroom and occasionally swipe on a little deodorant.

Parties?  Class?  Social interaction?  Not on your agenda any time soon.

Like I said, I get it.  Really, I do.  But I’m also concerned for your well-being.  So, between brushing the chips out of your bed and trying to drag a brush through your hair, read this and make sure you’re not taking things a little too far… Read More »

Since my high school boyfriend and I broke up halfway through my senior year, my love life has taken a slide down the tubes. Freshman year of college, every guy I liked turned out to be gay. Sophomore year, they all had girlfriends – with whom I’d inevitably become friends. And junior year, well, I guess it can count as an improvement… if being led on with dining hall dates one semester and having my first (sort of) one night stand (followed by long-term drama) the next semester can be considered an improvement.

Over the past three years, I’ve simply gone from one disappointment to another – and it’s not for lack of trying. Thanks to my double major and my minor, jobs in three different departments, nine student activities, conferences, meetings, competitions, community service projects, and campus events, I’ve met more people than I can fully express. Not to mention going out dancing, the dorms, friends, and other random ways of meeting people. I’ve met undergrads from nearly every department and school on campus, grad students, medical students, MBAs, law students, students from neighboring schools, and people who are already out of school.

And yet, for all the things I do, for all the people I meet, all I have to show from the past three years is a string of stalkers and a guy who let his frat brother hit on me while we were on a date.

One of my friends speculated that the reason I haven’t found anyone yet is because I’m too involved, but I really don’t think that’s the case. I love being active and social, and I’d never change that about myself. Plus, I commit myself to everything I do, so when I’m working on one activity or class or job, that’s what I’m working on. But, even more to the point, I haven’t even met anyone that I really feel connected to either. I flirt, I develop attractions, sure, but no one has really made an impression. And, let’s face it, since I’m going into my senior year, there aren’t many new opportunities about to arise at this point.

For a single, outgoing twenty-one year old, I feel like I’m severely lacking in options. Read More »

For a few weeks, I was in a rut – a big, blah rut that I couldn’t seem to find my way out of. I was grouchy, apathetic, and basically bored with everything. My self-esteem was not at its usual high-point, and I had no idea what the heck was wrong with me.

I know I lead a charmed life by any standards. I’m single during my senior year, I love my family, I have the most amazing friends, I go to a great school, and I live within five blocks of the most scrumptious fro-yo in the world. Life is great. So why the heck didn’t I feel as great as I should?

Well, even now, a few weeks later and finally back in Happyville, I don’t have an answer to that question. Something was just off, and I can’t really explain what it was. All I know is it’s over now thanks to a few things I did for myself. If you’re feeling funkadelic (and not the good kind) – whether caused by boys, school, or an unsolved perpetrator – maybe a few of these activities will help you claw your way out.

Outdoor Activities: Exercise gives you endorphins and endorphins make you happy (and happy people just don’t shoot their husbands, as Elle Woods would say). So get out and go for a hike, or play tennis, or take a dance class! Go solo or with friends, either way, take some time for yourself!
Set a short-term goal for yourself; reaching goals will give you a sense of accomplishment, which generally makes people feel happy and productive. Setting an attainable, short term goal will force you to be proactive and get you motivated. Read More »

I’ve been single (and loving it) for a long, looong time. So long, in fact, that I’ve fallen into a rut. I go to class, I come home, I eat, I hang out, I go to the gym, I watch TV, etc. It’s the same stuff all the time, and for a long time I was OK with that – I was doing what I wanted to, when I wanted to. No one was telling me what parties to go to, where to celebrate my holidays, or who I could or could not sleep with.

But lately I have begun to re-evaluate things a bit (read: weigh myself) and I now realize that I went from being in a single-girl rut to hitting single-girl rock bottom.

What does rock bottom look like? I’ll show you: Read More »

For the fourth weekend in a row, you’re settling in on your couch at exactly 7:03pm with your man and your Chinese take-out, mindlessly channel-surfing.You’ll pass out on his shoulder in the middle of the second Friends re-run you watch, waking up to his snoring at 2:15am, Lo Mein container still in your hands. You’re officially in a relationship rut.

You’ve passed the point of finding it completely precious that you can just “do nothing” together, and the way he breathes is beginning to get on your nerves.

Before you blame him, try changing up your relationship routine and get the spark back with these ideas:

Plan date nights

Both of you got yourselves into this rut, which means both of you need to make an effort to get yourselves out. Open up your calendars and each pick a weekend you’re both free. Read More »

I love the Fall in Michigan.

I love the way the leaves go from boring green to bright and beautiful reds, oranges and yellows. I love it when I can start to see my breath outside and I have to wrap one of my grandma’s homemade scarves around my neck. And I am absolutely obsessed with apple cider and donuts at the Cider Mill.

But as I sit here at 5:00 PM on a Monday and look out on a street that is pitch black, cold and dreary, I can’t help but feel the pangs of seasonal depression start to sink in. I don’t want to leave my house. I don’t want to leave my bed. I just want to sit, eat and watch TV.

It’s awful. And it explains why I always gain five pounds every winter. It also explains why there is a large and permanent butt print in my couch cushion. And why the guys at the Thai delivery place up the street know my name already.

So, this year I am trying everything I can to avoid my winter blues. In my quest not to retire to the couch (with a giant bag of Dark M&Ms) this winter I have been doing some research and have found some surefire ways to stay happy this winter:

Bring on the Light: One reason people get a little down in the dumps in the winter is because there is less sunlight during the day. Doctors agree that the best way to lift your sagging spirits is to simply get some more light: open the curtains as soon as you wake up, go for a walk, etc. Even a short amount of natural light (even on a cloudy day!) will put some pep in your step naturally.

Hit the Gym: One of the hardest things for me to do in the winter is get to the gym. Why go out in the cold to work out when I can cover my fat with oversized sweaters and sweatpants? Well, it turns out that getting exercise is one of the best ways to feel better on a dreary winter day. Those endorphins will get your body pumping and feeling great for hours to come. Bonus: a good workout will also warm you up! Read More »