We’re so pooped now we can barely form complete sentences.

Or is that the boxed wine we just drank…

Anyways, here is a look back at this hellish week.

The Bad:

The not-so-great news from the gyno.

The lack of a social scene on some college campuses.

That douchey Jason and his Bachelor mind games.

The leftover pizza…eaten off the floor.

A university preventing students from getting access to birth control.

The knowledge that Ryan Seacrest and I could never be.

The Good:

Getting ready for SPRING BREAK, baby.

Which can still be awesome even if we’re not goin’ anywhere.

An awesome dance playlist.

Relaxed fit (read: no muffin top!) pants are back.

Alexander McQueen is coming to Target!

That not-so-hot boy can still turn you on.

And, the best of all, there are some seriously hot professors out there. 

Of course I’ve trekked through the snow on my way to class, stayed in bed for days on end and silently cursed the snow plows that prevented a well deserved snow day, but did I really enjoy winter? With February already behind us I’m left with a laundry list of to-dos before winter is gone for another whole year.

In case anyone else is in the same predicament, I have the top ten things everyone should do before winter comes to a screeching halt.

1. Cafeteria tray sledding. “Borrow” some trays, grab five of your friends and head over to the hill behind the dorms before all that snow turns to a slushy mess.

2. Mix peppermint schnapps and Cocoa. It’s the perfect complement to sledding. Just remember, kids: wrap up the celebration with this warm concoction. I learned the hard way that the liquor and sledding combo don’t end well.

3. Bake cookies (or just eat all the dough).

4. Take advantage of winter sales. When stores need to get rid of their winter inventory to make room for all the bikinis it means gigantic sweater sales. Winter may be on its way out, but there’s no reason not to go out in style.

5. Keep warm with someone hot. There is no better way to spend a cold night than getting steamy with the guy from next door.

6. Make your own ice luge.

7. Bundle up in warm trendy layers. I can’t get enough of wooly tights, boots, scarves and mittens.

8. Snowboarding, skiing, ice skating. I’m not an athlete but there’s something about repeatedly falling down that just makes me happy.

9. Movie Marathon: Stay in all day long and watch a lot of crappy movies. Once it gets warm you won’t get the chance.

10. Self proclaimed snow day. Who says your campus has the final say in what is deemed “safe” to travel in. I say send your professor a quick email, get the notes from a friend and spend the day enjoying winter the right way.

Ornament porn…teeheehee

8 Ways to heart your Jew-man!

Lookin like a bum is the latest trend…

People falling is always funny…esp when it’s Madge.

Amazing sales this week!! Jump on it ladies!

Balenciaga…but cheaper. No one will know the difference!

Rachel McAdams spotting! God I love her…

Calling all porn addicts…MTV wants you!

Ew…bacon bath salts? What?!

High tuition forces some students out of college.

JC Penney may not be the same maven of style that is, say, Fifth Avenue, but they have recently rolled out with a few things that are definitely worth a second look. And a purchase. And some instant gratification from wearing it all right outta the store.

Their newest lines come from tons of fabulous, fashionable designers like, Nicole Miller and Ralph Lauren. They are trendy, good quality and easy on the wallet. I don’t know about you, but I’d take a $15 top over an $80 one any day. With prices like these, I can get triple the wardrobe!

Here are a few highlights from JCPenney’s newest collections. Click on the look to get the deets…and buy the item.

Ruffle sleeves and high necks are really in right now, and you either love them or you don’t. I happen to be in the former group, which is why these shirts totally rock my world. You can sport them with a pair of jeans and booties on the weekend, or throw them on with a pair of trousers for a more professional sitch. And at $14.99, they are pretty much perfection.

For the chilly months ahead, the peeps at JCPenney loaded the racks with adorable and cozy clothes. This toggled sweater, for example, is cute, casual and perfect for layering on a cold, winter day. Throw it on over a pair of leggings – full length to keep those legs toasty – for the perfect look for class. Did I mention the leggings are only $16 (and come in 3 colors!)? Yeah, no need to spend hundreds on the ones Lohan is hocking.

Not a fan of argyle? These leggings would also go swimmingly with a corduroy skirt, or, for the biker look that everyone is rocking this season, with this awesome leather jacket.

I also love these adorable and totally now high waisted, wide leg pants. This look is all over the runways right now, and you can get it at freaking Penney’s for $30! And skinny jeans? Every woman needs a pair – even moreso when they are this cheap – so go get em. Now.

Sweater dresses are huge this season, and these two options are great. Pick up a (cheap) pair of tights and some boots and you have an entire (recession-proof) outfit.

Bravo, Penney’s.

[Image courtesy of daylife.com.]

Remember that crazy, desperate college grad student from Sacramento who tried to sell her virginity to pay for her student loans (I guess working and saving is just not as profitable)?

Well, looks like she inspired someone because after Johnny No Name blew away the severance pay he was offered when he was let go from his investment banking firm position, he decided to move on to selling his gay virginity online — because whoring yourself out is the must have job of the year.

What is gay virginity, anyway? According to him, it’s a hand job and/or blow job, but absolutely no anal (at least not part of this specific deal), because he’s not gay. Sure, keep telling yourself that.

The real comedy comes when he swears to the bidders he is “HOT” and looks like Adam Brody. Well Johnny, if you’re so “HOT,” maybe you should try to model your way out of debt instead of selling a hand and blow job.

…Just a suggestion.

It may or may not shock you, but where there is one desperate person there is of course a few more; currently Johnny No Name has a high bid of $11,000.

You gotta loves those brothels in Nevada and Rhode Island, thanks to them this is all perfectly legal. I wonder if Mr. No Name’s plane ticket from New York to Nevada is included in the bid?

This is just another piece of evidence that shows how far people will go for money and sex. Would you sell your body to pay off thousands of dollars of student loans?

Ah, cheap yet stylish clothes. Does it really get any better than that? Where else besides Forever 21 or H&M can you snag a $5 top on clearance, or track down a pair of really sweet wide-leg pants for less than $30?I suppose Target or Marshall’s might fall into a similar category, but I’ve always considered their clothes to be on a different level. Target is known for stocking basics over trends, and Marshall’s is known for stocking trends… from two or three seasons ago, so we’ll just leave them out of this discussion.

I have this theory: you’re either a Forever 21 person or an H&M person. You are what you are, and you can never switch over—it’s sacrilegious. If you shop at both, let’s face it: your loyalty lies with one, and you’re just cheating on it with the other. Shame on you.

I happen to be an H&M kinda girl. There – I said it. H&M is and always will be better. Is there really a competition? Not even a little bit.

Point I: Quality

Forever 21 may be cheap, but you’re only kidding yourself if you really think you’re going to wear anything you buy there for more than a year or two.

H&M’s clothes, though still admittedly not the best quality, are sturdier. I have things in my closet I bought years ago at H&M that are still holding up fine—no holes, no tears, no anything. They’re still just as brand new and shiny as they were on the day I bought them.

Point II: Trashy Factor

Forever 21 is great if you want to be a beach bunny or look like you’re fifteen years old. Hey, there’s a market for that kind of thing, so I’m not slamming it, but if you want to look chic…

…then H&M is your place. They sell casual stuff, but I’ve actually bought a lot of work clothes at H&M. They’re classy, and they’re stylish, too—but not so ultra-stylish that I won’t be able to wear them in six months when the newest trend sweeps the nation.

Point III: Style Variety

Forever 21 certainly has a lot of variety, yes, but it’s a variety of crap. You know how you sometimes spot a clearance sale that seems too good to be true, only to examine the racks and note that it’s just true because no one could possibly want anything they’re selling? Yeah, that’s Forever 21 in a nutshell.

H&M has true variety for people of all different styles. As I noted above, if I want to dress classy, I can find something there. If I want to go clubbing, I can find something there. And if I want to be moody and wear only black things with skulls on them, I can still find something there.

Case closed. I fully expect to get skewered on this one, so unleash the comments.

Shopping can be hard work. How many times have you walked out of a store or clicked off a website saying, “I’ll come back later to see if it goes on sale”? And how many times have you actually remembered to go back and check? Wouldn’t life be so much easier if you had a personal shopper?

Well, now you can have your very own personal shopper with just a few clicks of the mouse. The new website, Shop It To Me, is your web-based personal shopper, helping you shop the best deals with barely any work on your part. Shopping where I can sit back and relax (and possibly even nap) and still find good bargains? Count me in!

All you have to do is tell the site what your fave brands are. They offer tons of choices, from Prada and Tory Birch to Splendid and Tahari. Then tell it what kinds of clothing or accessories you’re looking for and what sizes you wear. Let the site know how often you want to receive e-mails and where you live (so it can find you in-store deals) and that’s all you need to do to sign up.

Right when I signed up, Shop It To Me sent me an e-mail telling me about a super cute Ella Moss dress that was originally $166, on sale for $49.80. In my size too! They’ll be e-mailing me daily, letting me know about all kinds of deals on my favorite clothing brands.

Ohh how I love websites that help me spend my money!

Well, sorta wrong.

It seems that while any day of the week is a good day to bring home something new and delicious, certain items are better purchased on specific days.

Like hitting up the clothing stores on Thursday evenings when their shipments come in. Not only do stores kick off their weekend sales, but you also get the best selection of goodies.

Or saving your dining out experience for a Tuesday when the food deliveries come in, promising you some fresh fare (Apparently eating out on Sunday is a baaaad idea; that is like leftover night for restaurants.).

This article is chock full of great shopping tips for women on a budget. Or, simply, anyone who wants to get the most out of their shopping experiences.

Definitely something worth checking out. Looks to me like my Saturdays formerly spent at the mall will now be swapped with my Thursday evenings in front of the TV. Missing Grey’s will be rough, but anything is worth a pair of deeply discounted jeans.