Health guidelines and facts are constantly changing as we learn more about the human body and what we need to stay strong. To maintain optimal health, you need to keep up to date with the newest in fitness, nutrition and medical research.

Check out the latest headlines about that unique body of yours:

- So you think you’ll impress your crush by taking on a beer bong like a champ? A new study published in the March issue of Psychology of Addictive Behaviors asked women how much they thought they needed to drink at a social event to interest a man. The women’s estimates were more than twice what the guys said they would prefer. At your next party, drink less and truly impress!

- Has sex with your man been more pain than pleasure? Blame last week’s sushi dinner! A study of the latest food poisoning outbreak in North Carolina reveals a link between sexual pain and consuming predatory fish contaminated with Ciquatera Fish Poisoning (CFP). Men have reported painful ejaculation and women have described a burning sensation. Unfortunately, fish contaminated with CFP cannot be detected through odor or taste and is not a result of spoilage or preparation. Your best bet is to avoid predatory fish like Barracuda, Grouper, Red Snapper and Amberjack. Ask your waiter if any of the dishes contain these fish.

- I am the biggest baby when it comes to getting vaccinated. Wouldn’t it be nice if I could just eat yogurt instead of getting stabbed in the arm? Researchers have developed a way to use the probiotics in yogurt to release a vaccine through your stomach’s immune system. This method was quicker and more effective than injections in a study using mice and an anthrax vaccine. The scientists are even developing a yogurt vaccine for breast cancer and other infectious diseases!

- Your younger sister may soon be able to access the morning-after pill, even if she’s under 18! A U.S. court ruling this week will allow 17-year-olds to obtain the pill, sold as Plan B, within a month. U.S. District Judge Edward Korma is asking the FDA to reconsider whether it should be available without any age restrictions at all.

Who knows what the world’s best doctors and scientists will discover next week? In the meantime, don’t drink too much, watch your Red Snapper intake, eat your yogurt, and keep an eye on your sister!

You check your phone, and see that you dialed your ex at 1:34, your best friend at 1:52 (which is weird, because you went to the bar together), an unknown number at 2:04, and someone called “Tattoo Joe,” a name that wasn’t in your directory yesterday afternoon, at 4:23. You immediately call your BFF, and ask the question aloud: “What happened last night?”

Blacking out probably dates back to the birth of alcohol, but it has long baffled doctors, psychologists, and college students. Why does that one last drink put you over the edge, and erase hours worth of memories? Why is it pretty much impossible to tell when you’re having a conversation with someone who is currently experiencing a blackout? Britain’s Telegraph recently reported that the reason why people forget the embarrassing things they do when they are drunk has been discovered.

The article’s opening statement reads, “Research at the University of Sussex has found that alcohol influences the brain’s ability to form memories, making memories before a drink stronger and memories of things that happen while under the influence weaker.” Um… it took them until 2008 to figure this out?

While I found that statement quite obvious, I kept reading, hoping that they might have also discovered a cure for blacking out. Besides sobriety, that is. Apparently, these Sussex researchers hypothesize that “while a drinker may remember the happy events such as socialising with friends at the start of a drinking session, they are less able to recall the negative effects that happen later in the night.”

I have several problems with the above statement. First of all, if memories before a drink are stronger anyway, it seems that it’s a given that the start of the boozefest, happy or not, will be more memorable than the end, happy or not. Second of all, there are plenty of happy things that personally I don’t remember, and tons of negative memories that I wish I could suppress.

Case in point: I cannot, for the life of me, remember a serious conversation I had with this guy two weeks ago. All I know is that I must have said the right things, because I spent the night. On the other hand, I most certainly remember trying to hit on him again last weekend, and being completely rejected.

Case in point number 2: Everyone insists I had a great time at my end-of-the-summer keg party. Apparently I was laughing, dancing, and being a fairly-well-behaved social butterfly. Instead of my brain holding onto these happy memories, I only remember the part of the night where I was dry-heaving behind my house after a 20-second kegstand.

I think this study is full of holes. The researchers also claim that “people are more likely to drink heavily the next time they go out because they only remember the good memories about the last time.” I beg to differ. I hate not remembering. Even if I had a great time early in the night, not remembering how the night ended usually makes me simmer down for a little while (sometimes a very little while, but hey, I’m trying).

After a night of heavy drinking, even the memories before the sh*tshow can feel skewed and foggy. Did we have that conversation before or after the shots of Cabo Wabo? Wasn’t I a dancing machine even before I played my first game of beer pong? Even after a night of “light” drinking, certain details can easily slip one’s mind.

While I certainly agree that alcohol impairs the brain, and thus the brain’s ability to form new memories, I don’t think there are underlying psychological reasons (embarrassment, heartache, anger) that add to the likelihood of experiencing a blackout.

Of course, I’m no scientist. But I could be a guinea pig.

I’m not joking. Seems like scientists have recently discovered how to get cute little monkeys to control a small robotic arm to help them grab food. A small grid “about the size of a large freckle” was surgically implanted in a few macaques, allowing them to use cognitive thinking to make a robot arm grab stuff they want. Scientists believe this is a huge step towards finding better ways to help human amputees.

Dr. John F. Kalaska, a neuroscientist at the University of Montreal, believes this new experiment, no matter how young, might someday help “patients with severe motor deficits to interact and communicate with the world not only by the moment-to-moment control of the motion of robotic devices, but also in a more natural and intuitive manner that reflects their overall goals, needs and preferences.”

I’m sure Kalaska and all the other scientists are right, but for some reason, I just can’t stop thinking about monkeys in sunglasses systematically destroying the earth with giant, mind-controlled machines of death.

…I guess I need to lay off the SciFi channel.

Leave it to the Swedes to solve a shopping enthusiasts biggest dilemma: the mirror.

You know the drill. You try on a new pair of jeans. You twirl in the mirror to check out how your butt looks but your neck just won’t cooperate to give you the best view. You can drag along friends who may or may not tell you the honest truth, or worse a boyfriend who just wants to make a break for it and get a soft pretzel.

So what’s a girl to do? The solution is in a new device called the DelayMirror. Created by scientists in Sweden, it’s a combination mirror, camera, computer, and plasma screen. As you turn, the camera snaps pictures and displays them on the screen so you can see how you look from every angle. The device made its debut in the UK at a popular retail chain today. So far the reviews have been positive.

I wonder what will happen when the DelayMirror makes its way to the states. Will seeing ourselves (and our imperfections) 360 degrees around make us even more particular about body image?

Too bad that thing can’t see the future.

It’s comfortable, relaxing, heated – it’s the aquatic equivalent of sex itself! So why should you not have sex in one?

According to studies by a (virgin) urologist, hot tub humping may not be very safe.

The old rumor of man becoming infertile after too many trips to the tub has been proven correct – but how long must you stay in the water? A week?

If your guy’s testicles have been heated up to a rolling boil, yes – you should probably get out of the hot tub.

It’s also common knowledge that yes, you can get pregnant in a hot tub. make sure Aquaman wears a condom, and all of your troubles will be gone.

In other words, don’t let anybody – scientists, urologists, virgins, moms – deprive you of experiencing the ultimate. It’s all of our God-given right to experience hot tub sex.

Who buys a hot tub for relaxing anyways?

Just be careful that your parents don’t get to it first – that’s a Greek tragedy in itself.

Have you had hot tub sex?

• Absolute adorableness aside — don’t get drunk and eat these by accident. I trust you guys…I can just see that happening. (kilian-nakamura.com)

• Damn dude…get the hint. (wvec.com)

• Even if you guys may get a little skeeved by Tarantino’s obvious foot and leg fetish or his uncanny ability to come off as both the best and worst director in Hollywood, I just find it impossible to dislike the man. Even if he makes this. (Star Pulse)

• As if cigarettes aren’t expensive enough in New York City…now we can waste our money AND look like douchebags! (Crown7.com)

• Scientists think that a bra they’ve developed, that may detect breast cancer with the use of microwaves, is safe. Probably. (medialaunches.com)

Baby Bio was the last time science was a part of my life, with the exception of a few experimental liquor drinks I’ve concocted along the way.

For those of you who are like me, and haven’t had much science in your life, prepare to be freaked the f*ck out by this list of the most bizarre and crazy-ass experiments in history. These weird scientists went waaaaay beyond memorizing their plant names, and most of the time, they just jumped right into these odd experiments out of pure curiosity.

Check out the list. Learn some things. Freak out your friends. Warning: some of these are pretty disgusting.

Some of the most whacked experiments asked the questions:

What would happen if you give 297 milligrams of LSD (3000 times the level of a typical human dose) to an elephant? Wow, I ask myself that every day. Scientists still don’t know for sure, cause the experiment didn’t go as planned, but I’d say…ummmmm…it’d have one hell of a trip.

What if you put a female prostitute in a room with a gay man after he’s given “heterosexual hormones”? He’ll have sex with her, obvi! He is, after all, still a man. But, in the end, he was still gay. Dammit, science!

What do you get when you try to breed an ape and a human? Gross! Dr. Il’ya Ivanov was clearly a psycho for attempting to artificially inseminate female chimpanzees with human sperm. He was unsuccessful, but even more disturbing is how he found an orangutan named Tarzan and tried to recruit female volunteers to carry Tarzan’s child.

And even MORE disturbing? There were women who said YES! But Tarzan died before any orangutan baby mammas were created and Ivanov was sent off to a prison camp for a couple of years. Aw. Too bad.

What happens when you drink disease-induced puke? Stubbins Ffirth wanted to prove that yellow fever wasn’t contagious back in the 19th century. So he poured “fresh black vomit” obtained from a yellow-fever patient into cuts in his arms, put it in his eyes, smeared it on his body and DRANK IT. Didn’t get sick. Hey…I think we have a new Shot of the Week!

Why are turkeys so horny? Again, a question I ask myself everyday. Apparently, male turkeys are really horny. So, a couple of scientists removed parts of a turkey model one by one, to see how a live turkey would react to it. What did they learn? “It preferred a head on a stick over a headless body.” Turkeys love head! The scientists went on to do the same experiment, but with chickens, and I’m not kidding you when I tell you that the outcome began the scientific title: “Effects of morphological variations of chicken models on sexual responses of cocks.” Almost too easy.

What happens when you ask a stranger to have sex with you? This one is most near and dear to my heart, because it took place on my alma mater’s campus. FSU baby!

Back in the 70′s, pretty college girls from a social psychology class went up to random college guys across campus and asked them, “Would you go to bed with me?” to find out if girls or guys would be more receptive to the proposition.

“Seventy-five percent of guys were happy to oblige an attractive female stranger (and those who said no typically offered an excuse such as, “I’m married”). But not a single woman accepted the identical offer of an attractive male. In fact, most of them demanded the guy leave her alone.”

Not surprising in the least.

And there’s your science lesson for the day. I hope you’ve all learned something. If nothing else, you now know that elephants like LSD, turkeys are horny, even after having heterosexual sex, a homosexual is still a homosexual, there are women out there who would birth a monkey’s baby, you can, in fact, drink yellow fever vomit and not contract yellow fever, and, above all, a college guy would jump into bed with a female stranger faster than a girl would.

Um, you’re welcome?