[There comes a time in every girl’s life, (usually after a third or fourth martini), when she realizes “Damn, I need to do something… travel to Europe, take up Chinese, get married…someeeething! I need to change my life.” Finding myself in one such rut and without the cash-flow for a capricious jet-set to France, I decided to live by the book, take the plunge, and tackle the Benrik challenge. If you have never heard of Benrik’s This Book Will Change Your Life, crawl out from under the rock you have been living under, wipe the tired crust from your eyes, and listen up.]

Week 4 – Task 1

Day 29- Dial a Phone Number at Random and Read this Script with a Deep South accent

The Script (or at least the part I got to read before people hung up):

You know, without Christ, without Jesus, we have no hope. Why? Well, because we know that the standard of God’s righteousness is Law, a law of the Ten Commandments, a law of Moses on Sinai, saying that this righteousness, O Israel. But you know, God also gave another law. A law revolving around a system of shedding a poor and innocent lambs blood…

The Reactions:

1) I have a lot to do right now. I don’t have time for God or Jesus!

2) Is this a recorder? Is this the voice of God? Who are you?

3) Click*

4) Click*

5) Click*

6) Click*

Week 4- Task 2

Day 161- Leave a Poem in a Public Place to Brighten up Someone’s Day

As a writer, I have always beaten myself up about perhaps not being able to make it in such a difficult field. Who am I? Who would want to read my work? However, all of this changed the day that I was asked to analyzed the poem known as an “American Masterpiece” by William Carlos Williams. This poem gave me hope that absolutely anyone could become a writer. Hell, if this counts as poetry, my grocery list does too! And so, to inspire this sense of creativity in others, I decided to share The Red Wheelbarrow in a public space.

So much depends
upon
A red wheel
barrow
Glazed with rain
water
Besides the white
chickens

I hope the poem gave confidence to some other aspiring artist as well. If William Carlos Williams can make it, anyone can!

Week 4- Task 3

Day 33- Be on the Lookout for the Paranormal

There’s an App for that! Seriously! There is an application for iPhones, Blackberrys, and Droids called Ghost Radar Classic. This app supposedly mimics traditional paranormal detectors in that it uses sensors to measure electromagnetic fields, vibrations and sounds. After detecting something “paranormal,” Ghost Radar displays colored circles on a radar screen to alert its user of abnormal activity.

Whether or not you believe in the paranormal (or a phone’s ability to detect it), know that I went into this challenge with the utmost seriousness. My boyfriend lives in an old mansion on the outskirts of town. Given the fact that the place always gave me the heebee-jeebees, I figured this would be the perfect location for the experiment. I was right. I walked around the entire house for twenty minutes with little to no activity on the radar. I was just about to give up and delete the application when I walked down the upstairs hallway. Suddenly colored circles popped up all over my screen and my phone began to make noises. It really freaked me out! I threw the phone down, ran downstairs and made my boyfriend go get it in the morning.

Needless to say, we stayed at my apartment that night.

Week 4- Task 4

Day 251- Read Your Own Palm

Information found here.

Take the Palm Reading Quiz & let us know how your future looks!

Basic Hand Type – You have good taste and you enjoy excessive indulgences. You like expensive clothes and an elegant lifestyle, but there are times when you seriously risk spending more than you earn. You have good instincts and are self-confident. You are never at a lack for affection and companionship. Try to correct minor health problems as soon as possible.

Life Line (The Quality of your Life) – You are a healthy person with a bright personality. You will have a long and wonderfully smooth lifespan, but you will put great effort into your work.

Head Line (How You Think About Life)– You’re thinking is clear and focused. You have a sense for creativity.

Head Line-Life Line Connection – Sometimes you are sensible and cautious, while other times you are foolhardy. Try to control your impulses and your changeable attitude.

Heart Line (Emotions and Situations related to Love)- You’ll never give up on your search for the perfect partner. You are a very sincere person, so its important that you find a sincere and faithful partner. You are a passionate lover. You are capable of much affection, but you switch partners often. You will have a happy marriage.

Destiny Line (Purpose in Life)- You have a special talent in an unusual field. This type of line occurs mostly among artists and scholars.

Week 4- Task 5

Day 148:  Leave a Note on Someone’s Car Windshield

 Note 1 : “I left someone in your trunk. I’ll pick him up next week if that’s okay”

Note 2: “I am the engineer who made this vehicle. The brakes aren’t very good cos I was hungover that day. Watch out.”

Note 3: “We’ve discovered your car is the one responsible for all the damage to the ozone layer; please bike to work in the future.”

Note 4: “I’m a traffic warden but today I feel lenient. Don’t do it again though.”

"A razor? What are you trying to say, honey?

Christmas is fast approaching. (Five days, but hey, who’s counting?) While I’m sure you’ve already picked out the perfect gift for everyone on your list, I bet you haven’t given much thought to what you’re getting this holiday season.

Well…I have.

I’ve taken my favorite Gleek’s (Brittany S. Pierce!) advice and made my Christmas list early and sent it on its way to the North Pole. But I know that even someone as prepared and as considerate as me (making it easy for my parents by adding what I wanted for Christmas to their Amazon shopping carts) will more than likely get stuck with a few bad Christmas gifts. It’s okay though, it’s a burden we all have to bear, so I’ll brave the post holiday madness and head to the return lines.

I just hope I don’t get anything quite as bad as these gifts. Read More »

Being a damsel in distress isn’t cute. Nobody wants to hang out with someone who can’t get anything done by themselves. Even Superman gets sick of dealing with Lois Lane’s problems day in and day out.

It’s time to man up, ladies, and empower yourselves to live life without the aid of Prince Charming. Not only does this make our lives a whole lot easier (hello, do you really want to wait around for someone to jump-start your car?), but sometimes it’s safer to take matters into our own hands (instead of asking some rando to do it for us).

Here’s a rundown of the 10 things every woman must know how to do. Watch, learn and take pride in the fact that you are in total control of your destiny.

1. Change a tire: Being your own mechanic isn’t necessarily a manly thing. Whipping out that wrench and jack can save yourself some time, money and can even keep you safer. Sure, when I was forced to fix a flat I looked ridiculous – kneeling on the side of I-295 in my skirt-suit and patent stilettos – but it took me 20 minutes, saved me some big-time embarrassment and allowed me to still be on time to my interview. Don’t forget those hand wipes though; grease could be an outfit-ender.

2. Make a Roast: I’m not trying to say you have to become Suzie Homemaker, but learning some basic cooking techniques can’t do anything but help you out in the long run. You don’t want to end up like my good friend who cooked a knife right with the chicken (even if, according to her, plastic peels off of pans easily). Being able to feed yourself, no matter how rudimentary it may seem, is certainly a skill that’s worth it to perfect. Read More »

Lately, it seems like the whole freakin’ world has been on a self-help kick. In recent years, the $11 billion dollar industry has flourished. It’s provided us with “miracle” books like The Secret and an array of self-proclaimed internet self-help gurus (or trust fund babies with pink hair and Daddy’s cash?) like Gala Darling.

Everybody’s trying out this “positive psychology” thing. Basically, positive psychology is the attempt to change self-defeating, negative thoughts, like, “I hate myself because my thighs touch and hers don’t” into more positive ones like, “My thighs might touch, but my calves sure do look hot in heels…and I bet she’s anorexic anyway.” Or whatever.

Well, somebody thinks we’re doin ‘ it all wrong.

According to Canadian researchers, “just thinking positive” can actually have the opposite effect. It can make people realize just how miserable they truly are.

The study started by highlighting old research that if people get feedback they believe is overly positive, they just feel like more sh*t than they did originally. Like when my boyf grabs at my tummy fat and a minute later tries to tell me that I have “such a nice stomach.” You better believe that as soon as that boy is out the door, I’m gorging my face with Peanut Butter Passion ice cream in shame.

The article in TIME, which reported this research, states that, “If you tell your dim friend he has the potential of an Einstein, you’re just underlying his faults.” And no matter how dumb that person is, he knows it, you jerk. Read More »

A few  years ago, if someone mentioned a self-help book around me I would have cringed… and laughed in their face. I didn’t understand how people could pay money for books that any idiot with a computer could write and try to pawn off as good, sound advice. However, in light of some recent events, my attitude about self-help books and the like has done a complete 180.

Not to say I’m a total self-help junkie now, but I am pretty shameless about the fact that I read – and believe in – the healing power of self-help books. (Okay, that sounded unnecessarily cheesy, but you catch my drift.)

So, even if you’ve never snuck a peak at the Self Help section in Barnes & Nobles (or are just too embarrassed to admit it),  here’s some of my faves & some others whose street cred is pretty great, as far as self-help books goes:

1. You Can Heal Your Life – Louise L. Hay. I just recently started reading this one myself and I’m in love. It’s intense and has caused quite a few life-changing epiphanies, and Hay will seriously stop at nothing to help you create your perfect life.

2. The Secret – Rhonda Byrne. The now uber-famous Law of Attraction is explained in this simple, visually appealing, tiny book. And when you don’t exactly have time to sit down & waft through an intense self-help workshop like you’d get from something like You Can Heal Your Life, The Secret will totally suffice. You can easily soak up a chapter between classes or use it as a study distraction. It’s more exciting than King Lear, I promise. Read More »

I’ll admit it: I’ve got a thing for relationship self-help books. When I’m working the floor at my local bookstore, I can’t help but skim through the latest additions to the section (though I pray no one sees me…) Maybe it’s the colorful covers or the catchy titles; I mean who can pass up a book with the word “bitch” right on the front? Since I’m somewhat of a connoisseur in the area, I decided to write about my favorite for all you gals out there!

“Why Men Love Bitches” is as sassy as the title suggests, and that is precisely what I love about it! Sherry is hard-hitting, honest and, most importantly, RIGHT.

Now the word “bitch” comes with all sorts of negative connotations: rude, stuck-up, conceited and all sorts of other nasty adjectives. But that’s not the kind of bitch Sherry is writing about. In “Why Men Love Bitches,” the bitch is confident, not cocky, knows her worth and is not willing to settle for any schmuck.

Sherry empowers women and made me realize that I should not being chasing desperately after any man. That strips me of my dignity and I am better than that; in fact, every women is! If a man is making you run after him, you should turn your heels and bolt in the other direction. This is a clear signal that you will never feel good enough for him. There is a fine line between effort and desperation and Sherry definitely helped me clarify that and all my expectations when pursuing a man. Read More »

For those of us (everyone) who hates the new Facebook…

[Just don't tell 'em we told you...we hear they send snipers out after all dissenters]

I’m a student. I get bored in class. Really bored. So, I take advantage of the free wireless and spend most of my time in lectures playing online. And in doing so I have come across a lot of crappy blogs.

One might make a case that my own writing frequently belongs on that list. But that is because “one” has probably never seen this one.

As if to highlight how utterly retarded it is, the name of the blog (or the blog user? or both?) is Text in the City. WOW. Lame times ten.

The actual blog, however, is far lamer yet. Judging from the title and the subject matter, one is to assume this blog considers itself a takeoff of that popular and influential show, Sex and the City… except they did it with an “in” instead of an “an” (amateurs). While I myself am not a fan of said show, I do recognize the attempt to say things in a way that have never been said before on TV. Text in the City, on the other hand, is a bland regurgitation of womens’ self-help guides from the 50′s updated with the idioms of the new millennium (at least, sort of updated).

At Text in the City, you will learn the “10 Secret Things Every Man Wants.” Wow, really? Great! I have an idea, Text in the City; why don’t you write the blandest, most annoying possible things (for instance, booking a spa day for yourself so you can leave him alone at #1 on the list) in the most mediocre way possible (“We love excitement, and we are not just talking about in the bedroom.”)? That would be cool. Wow, Text in the City, you’re the most awesome thing ever! Read More »

Every year, some of us are guilty of giving sh*tty presents. Maybe we forget a relative until the last second, maybe we really don’t like someone but feel obligated to buy something, or maybe we’re just selfish bastards who don’t like to spend money, but whatever the case, every year during this time, truly crappy gifts are wrapped and set under the tree or beside the menorah.

And then there are those of us who receive those crap gifts. Opening a package and instantly realizing A) this person doesn’t know us at all or B) this is the stupidest thing someone has ever wasted tape on is always a hard emotion to conceal, but because our mothers taught us to be polite, we do our best. We smile through the pain and secretly hope the receipt is still in the box.

Not quite sure if what you’re about to seal with a bow is a crap gift? Let CollegeCandy give you a few hints.

• Scented Candles: You’re not in junior high anymore, so this gift is no longer acceptable. Confused 12-year-old boys give the girls they think might be their girlfriends scented candles because they’re cheap and noncommittal. If you’re an adult, presenting someone with scented candles is the perfect way to start letting them know you don’t care.

• Clothes That Are Way Too Big: Look, when in doubt, buy a size smaller. No one likes opening a gift box and pulling out a sweater that looks like it could house a moose. Holding up a giant article of clothing not only makes us immediately feel fat, but decide everyone else thinks we’re fat too. Total. Depression. Read More »