If you want to escape to the glamorous side of being young, wild and free, you watch Gossip Girl. For how to be thirty, flirty and fabulous, retreat to Sex and the City. But for a generation of women trying to navigate a discouraging job market and the confusion of their twenties, there’s nothing to watch on TV. Not until now, at least. Thanks, Lena Dunham, for Girls — the best show on television for a lost flock of soon-to-be women.

I’m raving about HBO’s newest half-hour comedy (produced by Bridesmaids’ Judd Apatow) that follows four twenty-somethings who are “living the life” in NYC: Hannah is penning a memoir and hopes to become the voice of her generation, Jessa is a British bohemian who travels the world without a care or a budget, Marnie is in a perfect relationship and works at an art gallery, and Shoshanna is a virginal nerd who remains naive and enthusiastic about everything. A few of these characteristics echo those of a very successful HBO show, one whose lead character eventually wrote multiple books on love and has become the voice and fashion icon of this generation.

But be warned, Sex and the City fans: this show is nothing like Carrie Bradshaw’s search for love in the Big Apple.

In fact, these characters aren’t even really looking for that kind of thing at all — Hannah’s sadly content with a grotesque friends-with-benefits situation, while Marnie is disgusted her too-touchy-feely boyfriend. Even more so, these characters are too busy simply trying to pay skyrocketing rents with low or nonexistent paychecks, and are complaining — heavily — along the way. Why won’t Hannah’s parents just give her $1,100 a month for two more years? Don’t they want her to write that great memoir? Doesn’t a year of interning at a company mean anything in NYC? Should she just get a job at McDonald’s or should she go through life as a starving artist and fulfill her purpose?

Yes, these questions sound like they were lifted from the #firstworldproblems feed on Twitter, and since the show debuted on HBO this past Sunday, its critical acclaim has been clouded by a ton of backlash — mostly saying that the show isn’t the least bit escapist but is just a bunch of entitled white girls whining about money. Even more so, these complaining characters are played by privileged people themselves: Hannah is played by the daughter of photographer Laurie Simmons, Marnie is played by NBC anchor Brian Williams’ daughter, Jessa is portrayed by the daughter of Bad Company drummer Simon Kirke, and Shoshanna is played by playwright David Mamet’s daughter. The haters say it’s hard to watch, connect with and feel sorry for characters who are as spoiled and provided for as the actresses who play them.

And as much as I agree with the critics on the point that this show seems absolutely ridiculous, I also hate to break the news that today’s generation of graduating females appear as ridiculous and entitled as the girls of Girls. We spend our undergraduate careers searching for our passions, for a way to be unique. We party hard on Thirsty Thursdays, spend hundreds of dollars on a weekend at Coachella and consider ourselves invincible to inevitable hangovers. We adopted “YOLO” before the phrase was an acronym, because we value the pleasure of an immediate moment over the security of our futures — which is why we move back home with our parents or couch surf until creativity strikes. We are Gen Y, and we look crazy, wasteful, entitled and spoiled to every generation who walked the earth before us. We really hope we don’t have to resort to careers in fast food — we feel like we’re entitled to something better, after working our asses off for our degrees and looking up to the ladies of Sex and the City for so long now (maybe that wasn’t such a good idea after all). Because we really only do live once, and we want to experience as many highs as possible before we’re buried six feet under — whether that be trying opium tea, eating cupcakes in the bathtub or becoming the voice of our generation. This is what life looks like when young people are still trying to figure it all out how life is supposed to be.

All of this doesn’t mean that we, like this show and its lost, poor and unemployed lead character, won’t be great. In this new type of economy, coupled with the digital age, the emerging remote workforce and the decline of traditional life goals, we twenty-somethings seem to just need a little more time to get there. And though it’s no reality show or documentary, being able to finally see an incredibly accurate representation — literally, since not everyone onscreen is a size zero, for once — of our confusion on television is simultaneously awkward, comforting, hilarious and therefore, entertaining. Because now we know — we’re not the only ones going through all this.

And that’s exactly what producer Judd Apatow was going for:

“It was built to be a show that you’d have to defend or argue about — for some people, it would make them angry,” said Judd Apatow on the backlash over the past week. ”There’s funny things to hate about it, because it is about people who are self-entitled and smart and screwing up their lives. It’s supposed to be about people who are a disaster and privileged, and every time you do something about people like that, people go, ‘Why are they like that?’ Well, because that’s the point of the show. The joke of it. People go, ‘Why are men immature in your movies?’ Well, because they are immature and it’s funny to see them try to figure it out.”

The first episode of Girls is available online for the next month — watch it below and see for yourself. Warning: the episode is definitely NSFW — it is HBO, after all — so don’t have this streaming while bored in your next lecture! Until you’re back in the privacy of your dorm, watch the super safe trailer below:

Whose side are you on — is ‘Girls’ just a justification for complaining about non-problems, or is the new HBO show going to be the voice of our generation?

Ashley is a UC San Diego grad who is holding on way too tightly to a potential career in magazines and goes to Vegas all too often. She’s fascinated with celebrities and strawberry beer and doubles as a pathological texter/emailer/blogger. Feed the addiction with tweets @cashleelee. Thanks in advance.

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I turned 21 yesterday. By legal standards, I’m a grown up. But most importantly, I’m officially in the era of the twenty somethings.

Yes, I know guys. Another Carrie Bradshaw reference.

I kicked off this milestone with some serious adult-like self reflection and an SATC episode. I noticed something – Carrie Bradshaw and her three always referred to anyone under thirty with disdain. It’s not my fault that a twenty-something stole her man and one of Samantha’s summer Hampton events! But I digress.

She’s said many things about the twenty-somethings – our twenties are for having fun, messing up, getting toasted, living fully and learning plenty.

I’m kind of afraid, though. Sort of like throwback first-day-of-school-anticipation. Even though you already knew what class you’d be in and you attended the sneak-a-peek the previous week, you still had all these questions. Where will I sit? Who will I eat with at lunch? Will I ever get picked for Student of the Week? So stressful!

After I celebrated with my friends, blew out my lone birthday candle and kicked off my heels, I remembered all of my priorities. I HAVE to find an internship in the next few weeks and then do an amazing job wherever it is. And then I begin my senior year in college – definitely can’t screw that up. And after allll of that, I’ve got to find a career, not a job…preferably in mass communications. And then, after that, I have to figure out a way of paying back these student loans.

Oh, and what about my future hubby? At most of my internships, a lot of the young adults were in serious relationships or engaged. It was almost like a natural progression: college, career, marriage, kids, over. Besides the obvious problem of finding the right guy, am I really ready to get married in a few years? I’ll take “no” for $500, Alex.

You see? So many worries and I haven’t even been 21 for 72 hours. Zoinks.

Don’t get me wrong…I am ready to have fun. I want get a head start on the “before 25″ bucket list and live to write the blog post. I want to leave the East Coast for a few months and be an urban explorer of some sorts. I want to be able to write everyday and not get tired of it. I want to be healthier and happier. Heck, I just want to go out on a (real) date.

The future is daunting, that’s undeniable. But I’m 21 now. As ready as I’ll ever be, I suppose. At least I have legally-purchased liquid confidence to prep myself for the challenge. Go ahead and card me.

CollegeCandy, do you also have the “getting older” jitters?

[Lead image via Petrenko Andriy /Shutterstock]

Sex and the City ruled my life for a very long time. I’m only 22 years old, so I didn’t watch the show when it was actually on HBO (because I was 9-14 years old when the show was on TV and watching Lizzie McGuire instead), but now I have seen every episode three hundred times on DVD and have grown to love these characters as if they were my own BFFs. Carrie was always my favorite because I loved the men she dated (AIDEN!) and wish I lived her life as a fabulous writer in NYC. I would listen to her narrations and hang on every word. Whenever she’d begin a sentence, “And I couldn’t help but wonder…”, I knew words of wisdom were about to follow.

But now I have a bone to pick with Ms. Bradshaw. Looking back, she said some of the most asinine and ridiculous things that a woman can say.  I’ve watched reruns on TV and said, “Seriously, Carrie? C’mon.” I’m sure the writers wanted her to sound witty and funny (and most of the time she is!) but sometimes I just don’t get it. So I’ve compiled a list of what I think to be some of Carrie’s not-so-bright moments. Maybe you agree wholeheartedly or maybe you worship Carrie and think she can do no wrong. Take a look and decide!

I firmly believe that Candace Bushnell was thinking about little ol’ me when she created the character of Carrie Bradshaw. Loosely speaking, she has lots of what I want in life – she’s a spectacular writer, she has several books under her belt, friends, a closet to make Vogue staffers weep and a playground of men (pre-Mr. and Mrs. Big, of course). She’s fictional, but I don’t care. She’s fabulous. One of my favorite episodes of “Sex and the City” is “Ex and the City”…right before Big and Natasha’s wedding. Before gallivanting into the Central Park sunlight in her Jimmy Choos, CB dropped a quote that’s been on my mind for a while:

“Maybe some women aren’t meant to be tamed. Maybe they just need to run free ‘til they find someone just as wild to run with them.”

Pause. Does Carrie mean that it’s…okay to be single? That I’m not supposed to do the searching? That I’m just supposed to wait around until 2032 for this mystery man?

Though I should be used to it by now, I’m starting to resent the feeling of being single. Especially around Singles Awareness Day, which falls two days before my birthday. Double the fun. While everyone around me is paired off doing cutesy things on the National Mall and browsing museums and brunching on Sunday, I’m stuck at home watching SATC reruns. The amount of fun and particularly alluring things about the single life are scant, in my opinion.

And then there’s the matter of finding an equally wild component. Umm, where? Where, Carrie? I’ve searched near and far and made the profiles. Yes, I’m impatient. But where are you supposed to find a Mr. Big or an Aiden in college? I’ve heard the stories from you guys about locking eyes with fiancés in the library or bumping into them in the street. I think that I’m turning into too much of a realist to give chance a chance, though.

For once in my life, I think I disagree with Carrie. I think that running footloose and fancy-free leads to danger. It’s natural to long and to look, right? Everyone wants love. Probably 85 percent of the conversations that I have with my peers, friends and classmates revolve around the opposite sex – the smart guys in our classes, the single guys in the area, the hot guys on TV. Correct me if I’m wrong, but love is on our minds all of the time.

Or maybe I just need new things to think about.

I don’t see myself running wild like CB and her three did for years, playing the emotional slots until “the one” appeared. But I don’t have a starting point either.

CollegeCandy readers, what do you think. Should we be wild and free or actively searching for someone?

It’s not easy being gay. In a world where heterosexuality is the norm and homosexuality has often been seen as more than just a religious taboo throughout history—you know, when legitimately recognized at all, that is—the LGBT community has worked tirelessly to declare that sexual preference is not a “preference” at all; instead, the nature vs. nurture arguments now lean more toward a “I’m on the right track, baby, I was born this way” mantra. However, is it necessarily a winner-takes-all conclusion in the homosexuality debate? According to Sex and the City actress Cynthia Nixon, maybe there’s more than one way to be gay. And ton of people are pissed off about it.

I’m pissed off too, to be honest. I’m pissed off at the people who are pissed off about it. In this week’s Hot Button Issue, I invite you to read the following carefully, because a lot of vocal opinions on the Internet are getting it all just a little bit twisted…in my opinion.

Actress Cynthia Nixon, whom we know as Miranda Hobbes on Sex and the City, has always been a peculiar case study for the LGBT community: she was happily in a relationship with a man for 15 years (they even had two kids together), but she’s been dating a woman since 2004. Though her sexual orientation seemed to have made a switch, she has said in the past that she didn’t feel like she was necessarily lying to herself or hiding anything. ”I’d been with men all my life, and I’d never fallen in love with a woman,” she told The Daily Telegraph in 2007. ”But when I did, it didn’t seem so strange. I’m just a woman in love with another woman.”

Many gay activists call her midlife switch in sexual orientation disingenuous, and Nixon chose to defend her relationship by controversially stating that for her, homosexuality is a choice. She explained to the New York Times Magazine:

“I gave a speech recently, an empowerment speech to a gay audience, and it included the line ‘I’ve been straight and I’ve been gay, and gay is better.’ And they tried to get me to change it, because they said it implies that homosexuality can be a choice. And for me, it is a choice. I understand that for many people it’s not, but for me it’s a choice, and you don’t get to define my gayness for me. A certain section of our community is very concerned that it not be seen as a choice, because if it’s a choice, then we could opt out. I say it doesn’t matter if we flew here or we swam here, it matters that we are here and we are one group and let us stop trying to make a litmus test for who is considered gay and who is not.”

Opponents argue that defining Nixon’s gayness isn’t about Nixon at all; it’s about how she’s abusing her elevated platform as a celebrity with comments that can not only further confuse young people who are struggling with their sexuality in silence, but also give conservatives some free ammunition to use against the LGBT community as they continue to fight for equal civil rights. Unfortunately, this is partly true, as people who are famous for something seem to automatically become spokespeople and advocates for something else (Demi Lovato fighting eating disorders, Rihanna speaking up against domestic violence, etc.). Cynthia Nixon just wants to worry about Cynthia Nixon, but she may have given up that right when she signed on for her first big acting role.

The thing about Nixon is that she refuses to call herself bisexual; she genuinely states that she was straight before, but she’s gay now. Political blogger and gay activist John Aravosis called her out on the supposed misnomer of her sexual orientation: “It’s not a ‘choice,’ unless you consider my opting to date a guy with brown hair versus a guy with blonde hair a ‘choice.’ It’s only a choice among flavors I already like.  And if you like both flavors, men and women, you’re bisexual, you’re not gay, so please don’t tell people that you are gay, and that gay people can ‘choose’ their sexual orientation, i.e., will it out of nowhere.  Because they can’t.”

Supporters of Nixon’s views say that whether people of the LGBT community say their sexual orientation is rooted in nature or nurture, it won’t actually make a positive difference in fighting the good fight. “Ask African Americans if they think being ‘born that way’ helped during the hundreds of years they fought for equal rights, or ask women about being born that way and how that helped get the right to vote or other rights,” wrote Windy City Times editor Tracy Baim in The Huffington Post. She also pointed out that religion is also a ‘choice’ that right-wing opponents seem to recognize, but ignore that of gender or sexuality. “If they hate us, they hate us, and how we got this way just doesn’t compute in their narrow minds.”

And after seeing both sides of the Hot Button Issue and agreeing with all the good intentions on the table, I feel like these members of the LGBT community are simply arguing over technicalities at this point. If being gay means something different to Cynthia Nixon than it does to John Aravosis, then can’t both definitions exist? She isn’t attacking anyone else’s sexuality; she’s only speaking out about her own. Why attack a fellow soldier whose sword isn’t even threatening you at all? Like Tracy says, there’s a different enemy that the community might be losing sight of, because of this.

Actually, both sides seem to still have a common goal in mind: so many say that these comments will confuse young kids who are currently debating and simply trying to figure their way around what they’re feeling, but what seems to be more confusing to me, a straight person in shock of all this controversy, is how these people of the LGBT community seem to be attacking each other’s worth. Does this environment seem like a safer place than the world where one is held against a harsh heterosexual standard, a place where you won’t be judged by your sexual orientation? Even more so, maybe Nixon’s controversial comments will actually help those young people out there who actually hope to choose to be gay but didn’t know they could! Can people still explore their sexuality after being in a heterosexual relationship or two? Yes, says Cynthia Nixon, you can, and it doesn’t necessarily negate the love you had for those of the opposite sex at the time.

And if we’re gonna get technical about timelines and titles, is a virgin who has never been in a relationship still straight, even if she’s never found a man she’s been attracted to? Just a thought.

I know it’s an important conversation, but it’s not that important and worth fighting over to the point where people forget what is actually worth fighting FOR. And sadly, that greater fight is still far from over. Whether “born this way” or bred into another, Cynthia Nixon is simply saying that we are who we are, right here, right now, and that’s all that matters. That’s all that needs to be accepted, at any point. “Why can’t it be a choice? Why is that any less legitimate?” Nixon asked in the NYT interview. “It seems we’re just ceding this point to bigots who are demanding it, and I don’t think that they should define the terms of the debate.”

Who is to say who we’ll be attracted to tomorrow, and who is to blame for who you were attracted to yesterday? Whether straight, gay, bisexual, or still figuring it out, your sexual orientation is yours and yours alone, and the only person who could ever have any kind of definition on the matter is the one you love, because that person’s gender—not their opinion—might change that label.

Can homosexuality be a choice for some people? Are Cynthia Nixon’s comments completely out of line, or are John Aravosis’ blogs overstepping personal boundaries?

Ashley is a UC San Diego grad who is holding on way too tightly to a potential career in magazines and goes to Vegas all too often. She’s fascinated with celebrities and strawberry beer and doubles as a pathological texter/emailer/blogger. Feed the addiction with tweets @cashleelee. Thanks in advance.

Many women dream to walk in the Manolo Blahnik Heels of Sex & The City Star, Carrie Bradshaw. She lives a fantasy life, along with her fantasy husband, in New York City. Almost every girl’s dream, right? But Carrie’s missing a few strings in the head when it comes to fashion choices. Some of her outfits look like she got them out of a fantasy world — yep, straight out of the sky! WHAT WAS SHE THINKING? Come on Carrie, you can do better than this…

Try not to cringe after checking out some of her most horrendous outfits!

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I respect Sarah Jessica Parker a lot, both as an actress and a fashionista. As an actress because, somehow, her charisma and charm made Carrie Bradshaw – an intrinsically unlikeable character – the icon for a generation. Even though the show has been off the air for seven years, and the movies haven’t done anything to improve Sex and the City‘s legacy, women still proudly identify as being a “Carrie,” even though Carrie is kind of ridiculously self-centered and emotionally immature (Mr. Big over Aidan? Really?!). Of course I also have to respect SJP as a fashionista, because she is fearless, not afraid to mix different patterns, and is willing to embrace any aesthetic. She’s always fun to watch, and I love that in a fashionista.

black jacket – Charlotte Russe, $42.99//black pants – NY&Co, $42.95//white kitten heels – Endless, $22.95//white tank – Express, $14.99//black tank – Old Navy, $8.00//blue statement bag - Zappos, $28.00

This outfit consists of a lot of versatile basics, which I think is always a good, solid look. A black coat with a black tank layered under a white tank is striking, but simple. Combined with some pants that have subtle leather finishes, this becomes a sleek and polished look. White kitten heels are a cute and functional shoe choice (though if you’re like me, you would probably recreate this with heels at least twice as high, or perhaps a more vibrant color). SJP chose a dark blue statement bag, which is an interesting choice, and a lot less predictable than a black or white bag. This is a perfect low-maintenance aesthetic that still looks well thought out and put together.

Not even Carrie herself wants to go back!

Carrie Bradshaw is an icon. Her lifestyle is completely unattainable (you show me a columnist for a New York paper who has a closet full of Manolos, and I’ll shave my eyebrows). She’s the most fashionable woman in New York, and she’s not even real. Don’t tell me you have never looked at a wacky dress and thought, “That’s SO Carrie.”

She’s an aspiration. You know you’ll never have her closet or her men or her friends who always seem to always have time to grab lunch with her despite their real jobs. She’s pure fiction, but I still love her. And let me be clear, I know she’s self-centered. I know she only talks about herself when Miranda’s mom dies or when Charlotte learns that she can’t get pregnant, but her whole aura is still fabulous.

And now she’s going to be ruined.

The CW is as close to closing a deal to create The Carrie Diaries as Carrie was to marrying Aiden. The Carrie Diaries is Candace Bushnell’s prequel to Sex and the City and follows Carrie through her senior year of high school.

Being a huge Sex and the City fan, I read The Carrie Diaires when it came out, and it made Carrie a normal high school girl saving her virginity for the right man. WHAT? I don’t want to see Carrie on the small screen as a NORMAL, VIRGINAL girl. I want fabulous Carrie. Flawless Carrie, who seems like she never had an awkward phase. Glamorous Carrie who simply shot out of the womb wearing Manolos!

I don’t want to see her with pimples on her face wearing a Hollister hoodie. That makes her just like me. Just like everyone else. The Carrie that we know is a sexpert, not a high school senior wondering why everyone else is having sex but her. I don’t want her living in a town that isn’t New York City. It was bad enough when she went to Paris (I don’t even want to talk about Abu Dhabi).

How am I supposed to want to change lives with Carrie when she’s cramming for a Bio test? I don’t want that. I want my Fendi-toting, Big-dating, sex-writing Carrie; the one I’ll never be.

What do you guys think? Would you potentially tune in to see Carrie as a teen, or do you want to preserve the truly great Carrie HBO gave us so long ago?