Comprehensive sex education is proved to work. It acknowledges that since some students will start having sex in high school (or earlier) that they might as well know how to do so safely. The national median of high school students having sex is 34.5 percent. In New York, where students receive progressive sex education the rate is 32 percent, while in Arizona, a state with conservative sex education, 35 per cent of students are sexually active.

Earlier this month, the Centre for Disease Control and Prevention released a study showing that the percentage of public schools teaching key topics related to sexual education did not increase in any of the 45 states surveyed. The study didn’t ask why schools were not teaching the topics, just what topics they were teaching. There are 11 recommended sex education categories, ranging from information about HIV/AIDS to the benefits of staying abstinent.

So where are teens turning for their sex ed information? For many it’s the internet. You know, that thing for porn. A survey done by a resident at the University of Western Ontario showed 40 percent of teens thought the internet was a more useful way to get information about sex ed than talking to their parents. The problem is, especially for teenage boys, that there is a lot of overly sexist information (take Tucker Max for instance) that is replacing good sex ed.

But, it doesn’t have to be this way. In my hometown of Calgary there’s a new program called WiseGuyz targeted specifically at teenage boys to both teach an updated version of sex ed while also teaching about healthy relationships and non-destructive masculinity. It’s an open forum for teenage boys to talk openly, with the facilitators recognizing that Grade 9 guys “consume a lot of pornography.” I think it’s a fresh approach that should be used an example.

What do you think? How should sexual education be taught in school?

Leah is just waiting on a piece of paper to say she has her Bachelor of Journalism from Ryerson University in Toronto. When she’s not working on the Ryerson Review of Journalism she’s baking tasty cupcakes and hunting for a job (hopefully that pays). Follow her @Elleandbee.

You know what talk I’m talking about. The one where your mom (or even worse, dad) sits you down and then doesn’t know what to say for about five minutes. So there’s this super awkward lead-in and in your 12-year-old mind you’re saying, “What the hell? I just want some chicken nuggets.” And then it hits you. Your mom is talking about sex. Your mom is talking about sex! To you! WTF. You just had your first sex ed class like, two months ago. You hardly even know what all of this means! Stop, Mom, just stop.

But she didn’t stop. You had to suffer through a stilted and shameful speech about the birds and the bees and how you should wait until you love someone and how sometimes you will have really strong feelings for another person but if you act on those feelings you will get pregnant. And die. Blah blah blah.

So after all of this terribleness, you most likely walked away and completely forgot everything that was said (if you even had the courtesy to listen in the first place.) Right? From what I remember, this moment was only a flicker in my early teenage years that was sufficiently awkward and then deftly ignored by all parties involved.

I mean, why do parents think that middle/high school kids are going to listen to ANYTHING they say? If this technique worked, 16 and Pregnant wouldn’t exist. But alas, it does, showing parents across the world that kids basically give “the talk” the finger and toss their v-cards at 14.

But I guess everyone has to get the talk at some point in their lives because it makes parents feel like they are doing their job. Even Bieber has a story to tell about this one. It’s just a part of growing up–without the talk, some kids might not even know about the magical world of sex in the first place, and how terrible would that be? Knowledge is power, mom and dad!

How did your mom or dad approach giving you “the talk?” Were you scarred for life afterwards? Was it the most awkward moment of your life? Tell us all the horrific details!

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What’s a political campaign without sex? A McCain campaign ad once accused Obama of trying to pass a bill incorporating sex ed into kindergarten classrooms. Of course, Obama doesn’t even need to utter the “s” word when McCain’s running mate, Sarah Palin, has the poster family for the need for sex education.

Maybe Palin’s daughter should’ve been given a sex ed lecture in kindergarten. Maybe, in the wake of the Gloucester school girls and celebrity teen momdom, we should consider revamping our sex ed policies, rather than letting Ellen Paige serve as an instructor when Juno comes out on DVD. I took sex ed. And now, I have sex. Sometimes quite freely.

There’s still a lot that I don’t know, and some stuff I know now that I wish I’d learned in sixth grade sex ed class:

-Sex is NOT synonymous with love. It can be, but it isn’t always. Sex is synonymous with physical attraction, hormones, and judgment (note that I didn’t specify “good” or “bad” judgment).

-Sex changes everything. It can burn bridges, create awkward situations, and ruin friendships. However, it can also take a relationship to the next level, or allow you to see your partner in a completely different light. It can be good, it can be bad, but either way, once you’ve crossed that line… there’s no going back.

-Sex can be fun. Why don’t they talk about Kama Sutra, tantra, sex toys, or kinky fantasies in sex ed? It’s all “have sex and get pregnant,” or “have sex and get herpes” talk. But if you’re safe and consenting, sex can turn into an amusement park with all of the different rides it has to offer.

-Sex doesn’t always work. There’s sloppy sex. There’s the sex that just isn’t going to end in mutual orgasms. There’s sex that you thought you wanted to have, until it happens. Shake it off — we can’t all be stars in a Brad Pitt love scene.

-Sex can be good for your health. The endorphins released when a female orgasms acts as a powerful painkiller*. Cramping from killer PMS? Mild exercise (like sex) can help ease the pain as well.

-Sexually active does NOT mean slutty (or stupid!). Did you know that women with college degrees are more likely to enjoy giving and receiving oral sex than high school drop outs*? How about that women with PhD’s are twice as likely to seek a one-night-stand than those who stopped at the Bachelors*?

I still feel like I’m coming up short here, ladies. All of our sex ed regimes were different– what did your teachers neglect to inform you during 5th period Health Class?

*Facts courtesy of The Sex E-Zine. Learn all you wanted to know (and a lot you didn’t want to know) about knocking boots here!

[This story was originally posted by Kathryn S.]

Get it? Got it? Good. Want some more? Don’t worry, there are plenty more faves where this came from.

Before I get to this week’s Glee-cap, I’d like to point out something about myself:  I’m a little bit psychic.  I mean, if you’ve read my recap of last week’s alcohol-related episode (and if you haven’t, WHAT ARE YOU WAITING FOR?)  you’ll recall that I brought two nonalcoholic issues into my discussion of the episode:  the idea that teaching sexual abstinence may not be the best idea, and the idea that bisexuality is a hugely misunderstood concept.  This week, both of these issues came in to the forefront.

Really, I should have my own reality show or something. But I digress…

“Sexy” marked the return of two of our favorite guest stars: John Stamos and Gwyneth Palthrow. It also reintroduced us to Emma, who hasn’t had much screen time recently.  She’s taken over the celibacy club, which now includes only Rachel and Quinn.  Emma feels very strongly about the need for a celibacy club.  She’s obviously a proponent of abstinence-only sex ed (and life in general), which is incidentally something that Holly Holiday finds ridiculous and dangerous.  The kids at McKinley obviously need to be made aware of sex and the consequences it presents.  I mean, Brittany legit thought she was preggers because she saw a “stork” outside her window.  If you thought Finn believing that he got Quinn pregnant in a hot tub was the most ridiculous thing they could come up with, you were wrong.

So Holly decides to subvert the issue of sex ed: she’s going to teach them about the dangers of unprotected sex in a way that is neither unrealistic or preachy:  she’s going to do it through song.  So she performs a number, manages to whip up the crowd so the performance looks juuuuuust a little bit like an orgy, then proceeds to tell the kids that “every time you have sex with someone, you have sex with everyone else they’ve had sex with.”  Genius.

Elsewhere, Sue tells the Warblers that the new Directions are trying to sexify their performances, and Blaine decides that his team needs to inject some (much needed) sex appeal into their numbers as well.  They try (you know there’s nothing sexier than a foam party), and while Blaine has got the sexy thing DOOOOWWWWNNN, Kurt just isn’t getting it.   Much like Rachel, who couldn’t write an emotionally connected song without experiencing life, Kurt can’t harness his inner sex appeal because his sexual interest, experience, and understanding are all lacking. That’s not only understandable, but also totally realistic for most students who don’t fit into the “normal” heterosexual box. It’s not like media forms are going out of their way to teach people about “unconventional” sex lives;  how many times have you seen Cosmo run an article on how to please your woman in bed?  What about the lack of articles on how to date another guy in Maxim?

Speaking of unconventional sex, Santana and Brittany have been continuing their affair throughout their various hetero relationships.   Apparently it’s not cheating if “the plumbing is different” – but to that I say “why?”  Isn’t the fact that two girls hooking up is considered a joke, insignificant, or something to simply gloss over, just mocking the concept of lesbianism?

Which brings me to another point: what exactly is bisexuality?  I think the reason that so many people discount its validity is because it really is such nebulous territory.  I think what Holly Holiday has to say about it is very true:  “it’s not always about who you’re attracted to, it’s who you fall in love with.”  But that’s just my opinion, and when it comes to bisexuality, there are a million different viewpoints.

Because it’s so difficult to understand sexuality, and because sex is too complex and powerful a thing to not understand fully, Blaine goes to Kurt’s father and tells him to make Kurt more aware of how things work.  It’s truly touching to see Burt Hummel’s absolutely unwavering acceptance of his son. Burt is more or less the gold standard of parenting here:  he doesn’t begrudge the fact that Kurt is going to have sex with another man at some point, but he doesn’t encourage him rush into it, either. He does what I believe parents should do: make sure their children know that sex almost never ends with the action itself.  He urges Kurt to wait until he’s older, but tells him that if he feels ready earlier, he shouldn’t face the issue alone.

Something else that was incredibly touching?  Santana’s reaction to her feelings for Brittany.   Naya pretty much ripped my heart out when she sang “Landslide,” and we finally got a glimpse into something we had almost no proof of up until this point: Santana’s heart.

Finally, Holly gives in and allows Will to teach her a thing or two about romance (UM, where do I sign up for that class?) It’s touching that both Holly and Santana decide to give emotional relationships a try.  Both are scared, guarded, and reluctant to embrace vulnerability. It’s something – whether you’re a guy or a girl, straight, gay, or bi – we’ve all felt once or twice, and something I definitely clung to as the show drew to a close.

Best lines:
“I thought I could surprise you when I dropped him off…I’m pretty sure he’s a boy” – Brittany

“Sex it’s just like hugging – only wetter” – Holly

“We watch the Housewives shows….which are SO racy” – Emma

“If I wanna see Kim Kardashian be classy, I’ll watch E!” – Puck

Best performance:
“Landslide.”  It was a perfect choice for Brittana’s changing relationship: it’s a song about introspection, and change, and loving someone enough to build a world around him or her.  It’s a song about the most significant person in your life – Santana and Brittany certainly have built their high school lives around one another….but what does that mean on an emotional level?

Maybe it was the first sign that I was destined to be a sex columnist, but all I knew at that time was that I was fascinated with sex. I was young, so I had no desire to actually have sex, but the idea of it – he puts his penis where!? – was totally intriguing to me.  Years of absorbing all the information I could – thank you Loveline and Savage Love – I became the kid all the other kids came to with their sex questions. Not that I had any actual experience at that point, but having religiously listened to various old people talk about sex, I kinda knew what I was talking about.

Being from Canada, I was lucky enough to receive comprehensive sex education from my school from grade four to grade nine… even if sometimes my teachers didn’t know completely what they were talking about (seriously, grade nine gym teacher, it’s not called the prostrate gland). It makes me sad to know that abstinence-only sex ed is being taught at most schools in the US.

Reading the comments from my article last week, it became pretty clear to me that the basics of safe sex is a blurry area for some people because they just didn’t have anyone to teach them. So, here it is ladies and gents, a basic, honest guide to safe sex. Not from some old sexual health nurse or a creepy gym teacher, but from a sex columnist who still gets some on a semi-regular basis:

Oh, and because some of you missed out on this special day in sex ed, I feel you need to see this before reading on. It’s like a rite of passage — and the video I had to watch was even worse.
Anyways, some things to remember:

Condoms – like a raincoat protects from the rain… only backwards:

• Not all condoms are the same. Think about upgrading to Magnums or Magnus XLs if they’re constantly breaking, falling off, or your partner says that they’re too tight (guarantee it’ll boost his ego, too).
• There are other alternatives for people who are sensitive to latex. Durex makes a great brand called Advanti that’s made of polyurethane and is just as safe as regular latex condoms. Hell, some people even claim they’re better than latex when it comes to letting you feel everything (I’d have to agree).
• Condoms are also very important for anal sex. You might not get pregnant, but you can sure as hell get HIV.
• Never ever ever wear two condoms at once. The friction between layers can lead to breakage. And you don’t want that.
• Sometimes they’ll fall off (if that’s the case, try upgrading to a bigger size), but remember to just stay calm.
• The condom doesn’t have to go on right before he penetrates you. Some men lose their erections when the condom arrives, so fool around for a few minutes after it’s on. It’ll take the pressure off of him, and integrating it into your foreplay will make it seem like a lot less of a chore.
• This is one of my favorite tricks, and it’s always been very well received. And look, someone wrote a tutorial on it!
• Condoms are 85-98% effective against pregnancy, and there is some debate over how effective they are at preventing STIs. But, since nothing else will protect against them, better wrap those willies.

The pill and other hormonal methods – take the pill/needle/patch and trust it’ll work:

• Unlike condoms, you have to visit a doctor to be prescribed birth control.
• Listen to your doctor. Start when he or she tells you to, and if you’re on the pill, take it around the same time every day. Hormone levels fluctuate throughout the day, so taking it at the same time insures one of those eggs won’t slip out of your ovaries.
• If taken properly, hormonal methods can be up to 99.7% effective. So make sure you follow the instructions!

Spermicides – like nazis, but for sperm… and it goes in your vag:

• Come in sponges, foams or gels and can be bought from the drug store.
• Shouldn’t be used as the sole method of birth control, and doesn’t protect against STIs.
• Read the instructions. Some spermicides can interact badly with condoms, leading to breakage. And again, we don’t want that.

Pulling out – messy fun times:

• New studies have found that pulling out is almost as effective as condoms when it comes to preventing pregnancy. Partake at your own risk.
• Will not protect against STIs, so this is only really an option for monogamous, tested couples.
• Can actually be kinda fun, in that it’s messy and just a little bit kinky.

Condoms, with a back-up plan – the “a lot-people-actually-do-this” taboo:

• Going condomless is tempting, but should only be considered with a long-term partner.
• Before ditching the “domers”, both partners should get tested and have a full-disclosure policy about their sexual pasts.
• Ladies: if you miss a pill, or somehow make a mistake with your contraception, tell your partner. He has a right to know if there’s a heightened risk of pregnancy in your future.

Sex doesn’t have to lead to diseases and pregnancy. The most important part of safe sex is to assess the risks and benefits and decide what’s right for your situation. Make smart, responsible, and informed choices — and have fun!

[For anyone who’s super curious, this site lists the failure rate for all common contraceptives. It’s good info to know.]

For my 20th birthday last year all my friends congratulated me on surviving teen pregnancy. Although we had a little chuckle, teen pregnancy is a huge issue that is only getting worse. Honestly, with shows like I Didn’t Know I Was Pregnant holding marathons every weekend I’m completely baffled as to why young girls are still getting knocked up. But they are. A lot.

Clearly these young ladies need a real lesson in Sex Ed, because whatever they’ve been taught is not sinking in. So being the baby fearing girls birth control experts that we are, CollegeCandy has put together a few rock-solid ideas to preventing teen pregnancy in this here country. If teachers and parents do things our way, teen pregnancy would be a thing of the past. And MTV would have a few time-slots to fill during the week.

1. Give them the facts.
This may seem obvious, but science has shown that teens have less of an ability to think things through and see future consequences, so it’s time to spell things out for them: Pregnancy sucks. You will get fat, you’ll act like a bitch-on-wheels, and those perky teenage boobs? Forget about them. Pregnancy can also wreak havoc on every part of your body: you’ll sprout hair in weird places, your skin will break out, your back will ache and it can even put stress on your heart and lungs. Oh, and forget about all those tasty snacks you love so much. You can’t have caffeine (which is in chocolate), nutra-sweet (see ya later, Diet Coke), un-cooked food (TTFN, sushi and lunch meat) or booze (which you shouldn’t be drinking anyway!) for 9 freaking months.

Did I mention you poop on the table when you give birth?

2. Show them their future.
If any of that doesn’t sink in, maybe it’s time to show pics of a woman’s body before and after pregnancy. I’m sure most girls would jump on a bowl of condoms if they saw all those stretch marks or realized they may never fit into their favorite skinny jeans again. On average, women should expect to gain at least 25 pounds during pregnancy, but most gain more (way more) than that, and those pounds are extremely difficult to lose when you’re taking care of a baby 24/7.

3. Give them a dose of reality.
Why not show a few episodes of Teen Mom? Watching Amber move into a dirty motel with her baby had us running to Costco for jumbo packs of Trojans.

4. Educate them.
Let’s stop with the abstinence-only education and give these girls some real information. It’s 2010 in AMERICA, for god’s sake. Even if you believe in the whole “save yourself for marriage” stuff, it’s time to arm our youth with the facts (and the condoms) so they can protect themselves.

But if I had to guess, I imagine it would go something like this:

They start off at a Build-a-Bear workshop where the brothers and friends gather to make cuddly mementos of Kevin and Danielle’s love. Inevitably, one of Kevin’s cheesier friends will make him his own wedding day Love Bug. That one will definitely take its place at the foot of Kevin and Danielle’s marital bed.

Joe and Nick have already confirmed that they’re forgoing the typical Las Vegas trip in exchange for something much cooler. I imagine they are chartering a private jet to Disney World where they will dine in style at Cinderella’s castle. For dessert, Minnie Mouse will pop out of a cake and give Kevin the Eskimo kiss of a lifetime. But no pictures guys, things could get wild (with Kevin drinking some sparkling apple juice) and it could be incriminating.

Next comes the scavenger hunt around the Magic Kingdom where Kevin and his friends have to locate all of the items on the list, including, but not limited to, one candy necklace, Ariel’s sea-shell bra, a Phil Collins C.D. and Tinkerbell’s phone number.

But the excitement isn’t over folks; Nick and Joe have one more surprise up their sleeves. The little JoBros will fly in special guest Dr. Ruth for a private sex-ed debriefing for Kevin. While the brothers have taken a vow of chastity, it’s time for Kevin to ditch the purity ring and become a man.  So earmuffs off, Kevin, you’re going to need these tips come honeymoon time.

Back in the 9th grade when I was forced to take Sex Ed from a 79 year old man with arthritic fingers (OMG they were all crooked and gross and I stared at my notebook for the duration of the class so I didn’t regurgitate my lunch), I took it for granted. I wasn’t having any sex (thanks to my poodle bangs), so I didn’t really pay attention to the wisdom that was  being imparted on me. Not that the information was very helpful anyway. Sure, I learned how to use a condom by rolling it onto a banana (which, looking back, was a very unrealistic guide in both size and shape) and figured out how my ovaries worked, but what about the real stuff?

After a recent debacle involving a leg cramp/involuntary spasm while on top during sex, I realized that I have a lot to learn. And not things like “279 ways to please your man” like Cosmo provides, but real tips, tricks and strategies for sex.

Basically, sex education for adults.
A required course for all college students.

I think a lot of people could benefit from a class like this (namely the guy that thought jack-hammering me was a good idea) with topics covering anything and everything you would need to know about doin’ it.

Here are just a few topics I’d like to see on the syllabus:

Manual Stimulation For Him: Deeper does not mean better.
Manual Stimulation for Her: Mastering the art he’s been perfecting since he was 12.
Oral Sex for Him: It’s Not a Chew Toy/Understanding The Mysterious Box
Oral Sex for Her: Wetter is better
Ride Him Like a Pony: Tips and tricks for turning him on…and keeping it in.
Road Trip: How to get it on anywhere, from the beach to the stacks.
The Fetish: Sharing your fantasies without looking like a creepster
Under The Table: The art of secret stimulation
On The Move: Changing things up without losing momentum
Dealing With Adversity: Queefs, leaks, and other unfortunate mishaps

If I have to take 2 math classes, at least let me have something useful.

Unfortunately the big O isn’t all sunshine and toe-curling euphoria that it may seem to be on the surface. Don’t let your libido fool you, orgasms can be dangerous too!

Guardian is reporting that your orgasm could increase your chance of being pregnant, knocked up, with child, up the creek without a condom… however you want to say it. Bottom line: orgasms give couples the best chance at producing a child.

Believe me, I learned my sex ed a long time ago.  Even before sex ed, I had that talk. You know how it goes, “When a man and a woman love each other very much…blah blah blah icky cringe.” That being said, I get that sex leads to babies – there was never any confusion there.

What I did not understand was that there are all sorts of muscle contractions and fertility pressures and magical testicle reserves that are tapped into upon orgasm.

The basic fertility rule here seems to be, the more orgasms women have during sex means not only more pleasure but enhanced fertility as well. Just in case you think biology is sexist and unfair, there’s an equation for men as well. The longer men last, the more healthy swimmers they will release.

Is anyone else wondering if men have known this all along, and have been finishing quickly and not making us orgasm for our own benefits? Maybe a one-minute man isn’t so bad afterall…