Ladies, I’m sure you’ll agree with me: one of the most important aspects in any serious relationship is the sex. There’s no denying the physical and emotional needs for it, so what happens when you’re not getting any?  I had never anticipated being in a sexless relationship, so it came as a shock when my guy had a confession: he valued love and intimacy over the physical act of sex.

Right.

Naturally, it was a blow to my self-esteem. Was it me? Was I not sexy enough? Did the thought of me naked make his manhood shrivel with disgust?

This is where the ever-important “honesty” came in. I expressed my self-doubt to him, and he explained how he’d come out of a really bad long-term relationship and he wanted commitment, not just wild nights. Being the amazing, understanding girlfriend I am (yeah right), I supported his needs for an emotional connection.

It drove me crazy. I had no idea how to handle this situation. We were ridiculously into each other… just not literally. And after a while, it started to suck. Again…not in the way I wanted. What’s a girl to do? Well, buy a battery-operated buddy, to start.

After a while, though, I realized maybe we were (gasp!) better off sex free! How could I ever think that? For one, we had no need to worry about condoms or me missing my period. And we were really enjoying one another in a way I had never really known before. I even began to think that maybe sex was overrated.

Yes, I too thought I was losing my mind.

But as we spent more and more time together – without all the physical stuff – I realized that this was the real thing. There are so many more important aspects to our relationship. We have 6-year age gap, so we’re learning how to manage a real relationship outside of college, which I’ve found to be harder than dating someone on campus. It also taught me that intimacy doesn’t come from sex, it comes from being happy with what you have.

Would I recommend a sexless relationship? They’re not for everybody. Am I happy? Absolutely. What about you? Have any of you been in sex-free relationships?