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Remember being 12 years old? Fresh out of the shelter of elementary school and into the big bad world of sex, drugs and rock n’ roll in middle school? There was so much to learn, so much to experience aaaand…so much awkwardness. And it all started with “the talk.”

You know what talk I’m talking about. The one where your mom (or even worse, dad) sits you down and then doesn’t know what to say for about five minutes. So there’s this super awkward lead-in and in your 12-year-old mind you’re saying, “What the hell? I just want some chicken nuggets.” And then it hits you. Your mom is talking about sex. Your mom is talking about sex! To you! WTF. You just had your first sex ed class like, two months ago. You hardly even know what all of this means! Stop, Mom, just stop.

But she didn’t stop. You had to suffer through a stilted and shameful speech about the birds and the bees and how you should wait until you love someone and how sometimes you will have really strong feelings for another person but if you act on those feelings you will get pregnant. And die. Blah blah blah. Read More »

Oysters, chocolate, and green M&Ms chili. No, I’m not listing off ingredients for a (seemingly disgusting) recipe; I’m listing off well-known aphrodisiacs, AKA foods that allegedly get you in the mood to get freaky with yo bad self (and your partner).

Well, get excited peeps, because there are a few new frisky foods to add to that list.

The Food Research International journal has recently published research saying that saffron and ginseng also boost sexual performance.

The professor behind the research said these natural aphrodisiacs theoretically enhance performance and libido and, because they are simply common spices, are safe to experiment with. Unlike alcohol, another aphrodisiac (the effects of which we’ve all experienced, am I right?), saffron and ginseng will not cause judgment impairment (the effects of which we’ve all unfortunately experienced, am I right?), meaning this is a fun and safe way to literally spice up your love life. Read More »

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I’m gonna make a bold statement here:

Role playing is ESSENTIAL in any long-term, monogamous relationship.

And it’s just plain fun in any other situation.

Role playing allows us to live out our fantasies in a comfortable, safe situation, and adds some much needed variety to our sex lives. But as fun as it is to be someone else for a bit, it can also be really nerve-racking. We’re not all professional actors, and pretending to be someone else, especially when you’re naked and vulnerable, can be hard.

If you’ve never done it before, do it. And if you’re not sure how, here are my answers to a few questions you probably have:

Q. How do I tell my partner I want to role-play with seeming like I’m bored with him/her?

A. “I’ve always thought it would be really hot to sleep with a professor. Can I call you Dr. ______ tonight?” Most partners will be happy to help you fulfill your fantasies.

Q. What are some good role play scenarios to try?

A. Anything that turns you on. My favorites are situations where one person has to talk the other into sex because it’s “forbidden.” Something like teacher/student or boss/employee can be really hot, and you can alternate who does the convincing (i.e. naughty student or pervy professor). Read More »

[It's pretty obvious that the average CollegeCandy reader has some very strong opinions. Opinions that she likes to share with everyone on the site. We love a strong woman (unless she happens to be charging at us with her fists raised), so we thought we'd give her a real forum to discuss her thoughts, feelings, and perspectives. Every Friday I'll be featuring a hot topic (like chivalry!) and leaving it up to you, the readers, to duke it out. So, read it and get your debate on in the comments section below!]

Sexting always seemed like a no brainer to me – don’t send naked pictures of yourself out into the world unless you want everybody to see them (see the smarts a college education buys!) – but it seems like the line has gotten blurrier and blurrier and now I’m not sure what to think.

Ok, let’s start with the obvious. We have all learned (from those drunken Facebook photos) that once something is out there, you can never really take it back, and sexting has the same issues. Even if it’s just words and not pics of your naughty bits, the last thing you want is for your BF’s pals to get hold of his phone and see (or god forbid, send) that stuff. Not to mention the whole, “what happens if you two break up and he’s still got all that stuff” issue. Read More »

Last week I gave some pointers about how we girls can kick ass in the bedroom. This week, it’s the boys’ turn. My boyfriend is, by far, the best sex/oral I’ve ever had, and for a while I was actually freaked out that he would spoil me for life. To solve that issue, I had him write a guide on how to please to a woman (that I could assign as homework to any future boyfriends).

Since I don’t see myself dating anyone else any time soon (this Natasha Bedingfield song is totally my life right now), I’ve decided to share it with all of you so that someone will benefit from all this hard work.. So here it is, courtesy of Mr. Amazing himself, and edited with some careful consideration by yours truly.

Lesson One: Oral Stimulation

Kelly Says: Oral stimulation is ALL about the clitoris. Know it, love it, lavish it.

The Boy’s Guide:

1. Stimulate the area with your tongue, but do not apply direct contact to the magic spot until the end. Most women are too sensitive for direct contact right away, and the longer you tease her, the better she will feel in the end.

2. IMPORTANT: feel out what she likes. Pay attention to her bodily responses to various types of strokes and methods. It’s really not that difficult if you focus on her pleasure, rather than waiting for your own. Read More »

I’m just gonna say it, I’m good in bed. I might be a little arrogant about it, but a big part of good sex is confidence, so I think it’s OK to be a bit smug. A lot of girls are insecure about their performance in the bedroom, but there’s really no reason to be. Being good in bed is much simpler then you think. Here are some tips from an expert:

Enjoy Yourself. If it’s good for you, it’ll be good for your partner. Knowing what you like and how to ask for it takes the stress of figuring it out off your partner so you’re both free to relax and enjoy. Don’t know what you like? Start masturbating.

Try New Things. It’s always good to break the routine. Trying new positions, places, toys, etc. might help you both discover a new favorite.

Be Dirty. Don’t hold back and don’t worry about your manners. Read More »

It’s no secret among my friends that I like being treated aggressively in the bedroom, but sometimes, I feel like I’m the only girl I know who likes getting roughed up. Perhaps that’s because my sexual propensities really are that rare, but more likely, it’s because a taboo against BDSM still exists.

Rachel Kramer Bussel, who recently wrote on The Frisky about a newly discovered desire to be choked during sex, notes that “Women, especially feminists, aren’t supposed to say they like rough sex … [There's a] misconception that consensual BDSM is a precursor to violence.” That’s something I know all too well. Last year, I blogged about an instance of rough sex on my website, Sex and the Ivy. While my entries often receive mixed reviews (because some disagree with my decision to write publicly about my sex life), I was surprised by the number of commenters who were outraged by this piece. Some of the reactions included: Read More »

Upon some recent discussion with my guy friends, I’ve come to realize that we girls may just be a little bit “too close.” I happen to be one of those people blessed with an intimate group of girlfriends, and therefore we talk about everything from the specific color name of our nail polish to the exact millisecond of how long our most recent sack session lasted.

However, upon stepping back a bit and really paying attention to what I was saying, I’ve begun to wonder if there is such thing as too much information sharing. Even if it never gets back to your guy, is it alright to share everything? Below are the key things that, looking back, I’m thinking should just remain between a lady and her man. Read More »