This week’s WTF is brought to you on behalf of Jours Après Lunes, a French lingerie design house that has just launched a couple new lines- one for tweens (!!) and one for girls in the 3-36 month age range (!!!).

While the toddler line is pretty tame, the tween collection leaves little to the imagination. From sexed up hair and long string pearls to creepily playful poses and too much makeup (one little girl even has a fake tattoo on her back), this isn’t your standard Hanes underwear.

What eight year-old needs a fancy bra? What toddler needs to have undies “just like mom’s”? Something is seriously wrong here. Let’s get these girls some underoos, stat!

Dear Mr. Thong Inventor,

I would like to preface this letter by saying that your work has made a large yet incredibly skimpy contribution to my adolescent years. And while I do believe in the nobleness of your cause, I am rather puzzled by the method to the madness of such an invention. As I hold up the tiny piece of fabric that is my underwear, several questions come to mind, such as:

Which came first: The thong, or “The Thong Song”?
The first time I heard The Thong Song, I was 11-years-old. Try explaining to a sixth grader, still under-clad with flower-print Hanes granny panties, the concept of a thong. Watching a leprechaun of a man do cartwheels on the beach doesn’t really do that good of a job of explaining the exact science behind the thong. In fact, I’m pretty sure I thought he was singing about summertime footwear up until 2001, when I realized I needed to wear this contraption to be socially acceptable.

Where the devil did you get this genius idea?
Was it a public service project? Did you see one too many VPLs (Visible Panty Lines, for you not-in-the-knows) and proclaim “I’ve had it! I’m inventing buttless underwear!” To you, Mr. Thong Inventor, going commando just wasn’t an option. Now that point I can understand, as I probably have not washed my jeans since the opening night of “Sex and the City.” And who really likes walking around with that, “I’m wearing the pant equivalent of dirty underwear” feeling all day? Yeah, neither do I. So really, Mr. T.I, you were the answer to my laundry-lazy, VPL-phobic prayers.

How the hell did you get it to catch on?
No seriously. It takes pure skill to get a woman to try on a permanent wedgie, let alone make it a long lasting trend in the sexy lingerie industry. Think about it: it’s a tiny scrap of cotton, satin, silk, or pearls (hey, I dunno what kinda stuff you’re into…) that is designed to chill between your butt cheeks all day. But women still go crazy for them! They even tease other women that don’t wear their underwear up their ass.

I remember my friend Emilie was the first of our 8th grade “group” to wear a thong. She finally caved in after much ridicule from her older sister regarding a tragically obvious VPL in a tacky polyester skirt (honestly, can you blame the older sis?). The day of her thong debut, she literally screamed in agony every time she bent down to open her locker. Even after witnessing her shriek six times before the end of third period, I still thought “Man, I gotta get me one of those!”

Even now, as a “mature” college girl, I will not be caught dead touching a pair of grannies, let alone wearing them during a hook up. You didn’t just sell them to the women of the world, you fooled guys into thinking they were the sexiest form of underwear. Yeah, I get the whole “more is better” thing when it comes to women’s asses, but that still doesn’t really explain to me why butt floss is an attractive option. You must have had to have some pretty solid endorsements to sell this baby to the masses. In this case, I think this product would even be a toughie for the OxyClean man (and that’s saying something – that guy could get me to buy anything). Was Sisqo dancing around a few lubed up beach babes really all it took?

Please find time in your busy pants-dropping schedule to get back to me as soon as possible. Seriously, we need to talk. I have a great idea for an invisible lingerie line that could really use a boost…

Yours truly,
Miss Thong Investor

[This story was originally posted by Elizabeth - UC Berkeley]

Likey? Don’t worry, there are plenty more faves where this came from.

If I know one thing it’s that girls who only shop at Victoria’s Secret for the bras/panties/sexy lingerie are really missing out. That Vicki has a lot more to offer than lacy underthings that make your boobs look huge; Victoria’s Secret is also an awesome place to stock up on clothes, shoes and beauty products. They even have jeans that give your butt some lift!

VS is truly a one-stop-shop for all your girlie needs and the best news is, you can find things within your college gal budget (i.e. under $20). Shop on, ladies. Shop on!

Henley sweaters are a casual and comfy way to keep cozy this season, and not only is this on sale for $19, but you get a free scarf with your purchase as well! Score!

Ok, so technically this set of bras isn’t under $20, but it’s 2 bras for $32, which brings each down to only $16 a pop. (That’s only $8 a boob!) Where can you find a deal like that on good quality comfy bras? Nowhere.

Lip gloss should always be in your purse and with a 5 for $20 deal on all Victoria’s Secret makeup, you can stock up on a whole bunch of items that’ll help ya look lovely. Seriously, the VS makeup is really great quality stuff and I highly recommend loading up.

Leggings are my go-to during winter months; they tuck into boots fabulously, look adorable with oversized sweaters, and for those really cold days, you can put them under your jeans.  VS has these that are 2/$20 and come in a wide array of colors. I definitely plan on stocking up (no pun intended).

No, I don’t know why this girl is wearing pajamas to go bike riding in a prairie, but I do know that when you’re looking for comfort, the Pink collection is the way to go. These pants are great for lounging in your dorm, at home during the holidays, or when you need to run out to get a Gatorade on a Saturday morning.

I happen to think that sweaters are totes cute and I always look forward to sweater weather. And this sweater is one of the reasons why. I love the turtleneck, sleeve length and button details, and at $15, you can’t go wrong.

These panties manage to pull off sweet & sexy at the same time, and the hipster and cheeky cut will do wonders for your tush. With so many cute prints/colors to choose from, I’d be hard-pressed to find a reason not to grab up multiple pairs…

Wrap tops are flattering on every figure and do a great job of accentuating your curves. Mix that perk with the fact that this cotton top will be comfortable enough to wear to lecture and sexy enough to wear for a girls’ night out and you’ve got yourself the perfect addition to your fall/winter wardrobe!

P.S. If you shop today, you can take an extra 20% off one item! Let’s all give thanks to our new BFF, Victoria!

With Halloween on the way, thing are getting sexed up, so it only seems right that we get down to discussing the bare minimum of sexy coverings – lingerie.

On one side, practically every woman I know owns at least a couple of sets of racy underpinnings, and there’s a good reason for it. Completely aside from the obvious “look sexy for sex” aspect of lingerie (let’s face it, if clothes are coming off, guys care less about the undies than what’s under them) there’s a certain mental boost that comes from wearing pretty things – even if no one else gets to see them. Like putting on a great set of heels, the right underwear can change your mood, maybe even make you want to be ballsier/flirtier/whateverer and pump up your game. And in turn, that feeling can lead to all sorts of good things, including sex.

Another bonus on the lingerie side is that brands like Victoria’s Secret and websites like figleaves have brought sexy (and wearable) lingerie into reasonable prices, so now we can all afford to have a little more “badda-bing” in our lives.  And yeah, the average guy probably couldn’t tell La Perla from Fruit of the Loom, but pretty underthings are still probably going to get his heart pounding better than the rose-printed cotton ones your grandma bought you in high school. When you look sexy, you feel sexy, and do any of us really wake up in the morning and say “I just wish I weren’t so damn sexy!” (well, maybe on a good day).

But, there are a lot of downsides to lingerie too. There’s still a pretty big disconnect between the sexy stuff and stuff you can really wear – with all the bumps and lacy bits, it almost inevitably shows under your clothes – not to mention all of the itchy-itchy, pokey-pokey. And, again like shoes, despite the meager amount of fabric involved, the really good stuff is nigh unreachable for those of us on a student budget. More than all of that though, are the implications from lingerie. For the sake of time, I’m going to ignore the “lingerie is sexist” part of the argument; it’s pretty easy to figure out and has been made other places. To me, the biggest problem comes from the lingerie industry itself – an industry that in many ways is more “size-ist” than any other segment of fashion.

I have long heard my chesty friends lament about how there just aren’t pretty bras made in their sizes, or how those that are don’t give them what they need in the support and comfort category. Meanwhile, those of us whose cups do not runneth over are faced with an overwhelming quantity of push-ups and cup additions that practically scream “you’re boobs aren’t big enough!” And all of the really high end stuff? Most of it seems to be made for girls who have so little body fat, they could practically go bra-less anyway.

What do you say? Is lingerie just the little ego boost you need? Or will you be sticking to the flesh toned undies that keep you in place and in comfort?

The stepping stone to the perfect outfit is the right underwear. With the start of the school year rapidly approaching, it is time to purge your drawers of anything ill-fitting, stained or tattered. It may be hard to part with your favorite undergarments, but there are a million reasons why you should. Like the fact that no boy wants to see you in a pair of torn up undies, or that around 80% of women wear the wrong size bra.

Be nice to your girls and go get re-fitted.

It’s a new year, and it’s important to purge the old and buy new pretty underthings.  Even if you usually steer clear of color in your wardrobe, your lingerie is the perfect place to add a little excitement without any risk.  Whether you’re going to be showing it off for someone special (or someone those beer goggles make you think is special), or are just going to be dancing in front of your own mirror, it’s a good time to pick up some new pieces.

Lingerie can make even the shyest girl feel instantly sexy, and there is literally something out there for everyone. In fact, there are lots of somethings, which means you can stock up and hold off on laundering for a little bit longer. Anyways, here are some of my favorite under-thingies – from sexy to sweet, normal to naughty – right now:

I would like to preface this letter by saying that your work has made a large yet incredibly skimpy contribution to my adolescent years. And while I do believe in the nobleness of your cause, I am rather puzzled by the method to the madness of such an invention. As I hold up the tiny piece of fabric that is my underwear, several questions come to mind, such as:

• Which came first: The thong, or “The Thong Song”?

The first time I heard the thong song, I was 11-years-old. Try explaining to a sixth grader, still under-clad with flower-print Hanes grannie panties, the concept of a thong. Watching a leprechaun of a man do cartwheels on the beach doesn’t really do that good of a job of explaining the exact science behind the thong. In fact, I’m pretty sure I thought he was singing about summertime footwear up until 2001, when I realized I needed to wear this contraption to be socially acceptable.

• Where the devil did you get this genius idea?

Was it a public service project? Did you see one too many VPLs (Visible Panty Lines, for you not-in-the-knows) and proclaim “I’ve had it! I’m inventing buttless underwear!” To you, Mr. Thong Inventor, going commando just wasn’t an option. Now that point I can understand, as I probably have not washed my jeans since the opening night of “Sex and the City.” And who really likes walking around with that “I’m wearing the pant equivalent of dirty underwear” feeling all day? Yeah, neither do I. So really, Mr. T.I, you were the answer to my laundry-lazy, VPL-phobic prayers.

• How the hell did you get it to catch on?

No seriously. It takes pure skill to get a woman to try on a permanent wedgie, let alone make it a long lasting trend in the sexy lingerie industry. Think about it: it’s a tiny scrap of cotton, satin, silk, or pearls (hey, I dunno what kinda stuff you’re into…) that is designed to chill between your butt cheeks all day. But women still go crazy for them! They even tease other women that don’t wear their underwear up their ass.

I remember my friend Emilie was the first of our 8th grade “group” to wear a thong. She finally caved in after much ridicule from her older sister regarding a tragically obvious VPL in a tacky polyester skirt (honestly, can you blame the older sis?). The day of her thong debut, she literally screamed in agony every time she bent down to open her locker. Even after witnessing her shriek six times before the end of third period, I still thought “Man, I gotta get me one of those!”

Even now, as a “mature” college girl, I will not be caught dead touching a pair of grannies, let alone wearing them during a hook up. You didn’t just sell them to the women of the world, you fooled guys into thinking they were the sexiest form of underwear. Yeah, I get the whole “more is better” thing when it comes to women’s asses, but that still doesn’t really explain to me why butt floss is an attractive option. You must have had to have some pretty solid endorsements to sell this baby to the masses. In this case, I think this product would even be a toughie for the OxyClean man (and that’s saying something – that guy can get me to buy anything). Was Sisqo dancing around a few lubed up beach babes really all it took?

Please find time in your busy pants-dropping schedule to get back to me as soon as possible. Seriously, we need to talk. I have a great idea for an invisible lingerie line that could really use a boost…

Yours truly,

Miss Thong Investor

[photo from www.environmentaltalk.com]