So, today is World Nude Day. Yeah, we wish we knew too; this sweater is really itchy, and we are pretty sure our professor would cancel all Friday classes if we’d shown up in our birthday suits. Apparently this “holiday” was started in New Zealand to celebrate the body in its natural state and we applaud that. Everyone should love their body and want to show it off to the world!

At the same time, though, there are plenty people in this world who we’d rather not celebrate with. And we think it’s pretty obvious why. Call us haters if you will, but would you want to bump into a nude Dick Cheney, or have to compare your body to a nude Beyonce? Yeah, we didn’t think so.

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In response to yesterday’s list of 13 Truths About Women, we weren’t sure what to do. Do we respond to their “truths”? Maybe give them a little real information on women, instead of that bullsh*t they came up with?Or, do we go ahead and enlighten the world with some truths about men? Things we know to be true and think everyone should know when dealing with these….creatures.

We went with the latter. So, here they are: 13 Truths About Men That They Will Lie About Until They Die, But We Are Insightful Enough to Figure Out No Matter How Much They Deny:

(We must note, however, that, unlike men, we realize that all these truths can’t possible apply to all men. But they do show up, in some combination, in every single one.)

1. Sex Is Always a Top Priority: Guys often will try to make women believe that they are sensitive and don’t care about sex (“I want to talk!”), but that couldn’t be further from the truth. Sex is always number 1. Over sports. Over work. Over you. Over your relationship when he is in another city and a cute girl starts talking to him. Over his family. Over his health. If sex is an option, he will be taking it. And if sex is an option without a condom, he will be taking it in the 2.5 seconds it takes to rip your clothes off. No time to consider the repercussions, because those don’t matter when he can do it without the burden of a condom! Read More »