You’ve finally moved out of the dorms, and it just so happens that your new diggs are the perfect place to throw a party. No RA’s, no quiet hours, no cramming 50 people into your tiny dorm and trying to have a dance party. Sweet!

Throwing a party might seem like a no-brainer. Still, you have make sure all of your bases are covered, or you’ll find people trickling out before midnight, hoping to catch another bigger, better party before the sun comes up and the night is a complete bust.

If you want to throw the party of the year–the one people are still talking about at graduation, the one people are still talking about at the reunion–just take heed of these simple cardinal rules.

1. Spread the Word Like Wildfire.

Don’t just mention it to your lab partner. Don’t put up an away message saying “Party tonight! Come on over!” There’s plenty of parties to choose from on campus, so you want yours to be the one everyone’s talking about.

Create a Facebook event. Make fliers and wallpaper your apartment complex. Interrupt your Criminology lecture by screaming, “Let’s F–KING RAGE!” Okay, that one might be going to far, but figure out what methods of advertising will work best for you, and do ‘em twice.

2. Find a Gimmick.

Like I said, there’s probably a lot of options on campus on a Saturday night, whether it’s another party or a great bar special. A gimmick will not only attract partygoers, but it will help them remember your party. The “gimmick” can be anything from a crazy theme party to a simple keg party (seriously, throw the word “keg” in there, and people will flock, arms outstretched and tongues hanging out, like a scene from Night of the Living Dead). Toga parties, Pimps and Hoes parties, and Graffiti parties all sound more interesting than “Party in 5C – BYOB.” Am I right?

You can also think of random things to celebrate to get people talking. It’s also a good way to guilt trip guests into “stopping by,” at which point, they will see how much fun your party is and immediately blow off whatever party they were en route to in the first place. Twenty-first birthdays are a classic example. Everyone has to stop by to wish you well. My twenty-first was so successful that I’ve had one every year since, and the “2nd Annual 21st Birthday Bash” and “3rd Annual 21st Birthday Bash” were also smashing.

3. “Entertainment” Does Not Mean Your IPod on a Speaker.

Music is essential, but there’s more to a party than your Flo Rida megamix blaring for six hours straight. Setting up different “activities” will keep people interested, and make more people float through the party, and mingle, and… oh yeah, drink more. Set up beer pong in the backyard and flip cup in your kitchen. Spring for an ice luge so your guests don’t get bored waiting for their turn at beer pong. Announce a shotgun contest, a kegstand contest, or some other ridiculous competition just after you’ve hit full capacity and the buzz starts to creep in.

It’s also a good idea to have a low-key game going on when the party starts to alleviate any awkward “I’m-the-first-person-here-and-this-isn’t-really-a-party” vibes when the very first partiers trickle in to an empty house. I suggest a card game like Kings. Everyone can play, everyone drinks a lot, and by the time you’ve all done your second or third waterfall, you’ll slam your cups on the table and look up to see that somehow a few dozen bodies have appeared in your living room, and the party is officially ON.

4. Don’t Spend All of Your Efforts on Booze.

Yes, people will be coming to your party to drink. But just because you’ve stocked your liquor cabinet doesn’t mean your work is done. When people drink, they get hungry. So plan on supplying some food. If it’s an all-day party, have a barbecue or order some sandwich platters. If it’s a typical Saturday Night banger, stock up on carbs and starches in the form of potato chips, tortilla chips, and pretzels. Ordering a couple of sheet pizzas or a few dozen wings will never be unappreciated. If you are providing liquor, grab some mixers. Even if you aren’t providing liquor, it’s nice to have juice or soda on hand for your guests.

While you’re stocking up on munchies, run through the paper goods aisle of the grocery store, and buy a surplus of solo cups, paper towels, garbage bags, and toilet paper. Who knows how many people will run through your bathroom throughout the course of the evening, and you definitely don’t want drunk people using your bath towels when they can’t find toilet paper. Likewise, you want paper towels on hand for spilled beer, whether you soak it up during the party or the next morning.

If you are particularly meticulous, you might make sure that your medicine cabinet is stocked with bandages, in case of drunken injuries, or even rubber gloves, in case of vomit.

5. When You Think You Have Enough Booze, Buy More.

The cardinal rule of throwing a party is always overestimate when it comes to alcohol. When the well runs dry, the party’s over. If you are throwing a keg party, consider the beer measurements:

A “keg” is actually a half-barrel, and holds 15.5 gallons of beer. A quarter-barrel (usually referred to as a half-keg) is less than three 30-racks of beer. So, if you have one half-barrel at your party, you’ll get about 124 US pints, or 16 oz. beers, out of it. That will feed about 20 people 6 beers each.

While it’s not necessarily your responsibility to provide all of the alcohol for all of your guests, you may also want to consider picking up some liquor for the non-beer drinkers, or just to shake things up a bit once the party starts raging. Pizza is a win-win in the food category, and jungle juice will never do you wrong when it comes to stocking up on liquor.

Depending on how much alcohol you want to provide personally, you can always charge for cups, or ask for donations to help fund the shindig. But, even if you’re weary about splurging on a few kegs, or making your own mini-bar, just remember: if anything’s leftover, you can always drink it later.

7 a.m.: Wake up. Still drunk from the bar last night? Mayyyybe.

9 a.m.: Arrive at the football stadium; crack your first beer.

9 a.m.-Noon: Tailgate your face off. Tailgating activities may or may not include: Beer pong, funneling, shotgunning, and general raging.

Noon: Kickoff. You’re highly buzzed, but still careful not to spill your overpriced stadium beer as you shake your foam finger at the other team.

7 p.m.: You pass out. Hey, it was a long day, man.

Now that’s what I call a waste of a Saturday night. I know that rallying for almost 12 hours straight can take its toll. Especially when you’re running on a few hours of sleep after a killer Friday night. But if you pace yourself, and plan your evening effectively, there’s no reason that you can’t take in both the football game and a killer kegger (or two).

1. Don’t Chug, Chill.

Get too drunk too quickly, and you’re likely to pass out before halftime, let alone make it till midnight. Tailgating festivities often require heavy drinking, so if you find yourself partaking in a shotgun contest, follow the beer with a water. Spreading out your alcohol intake will allow you to last longer. Afterall, following a tailgate with a party is like a party marathon. And don’t they tell marathon runners to pace themselves so they can make it to the finish line? Oh, the things college kids could learn from athletes.

2. Counteract with Caffeine.

Pound a Redbull on the way to the game, or start your bar night with a vodka and Redbull. Still chilly in your student section hoodie? Bring a thermos of coffee to the tailgate…then spike it with Bailey’s. Yum! Even if you’re really tired, however, monitor your caffeine intake. One or two cups of coffee or one energy drink should get you through the day.

3. Keep the Adrenaline Pumping.

If the excitement level declines, you’re energy is bound to follow suit. Your adrenaline is rushing as you cheer on your football team, and then you lose momentum in the downtime between the game and the party. Arrange a rowdy post-game dinner of wings and pizza with your fellow tailgaters, so you can recount all the great plays. It’ll keep you pumped, and you won’t even realize how much time has passed between your first beer and your last shot. Then, when you get to the party, keep yourself going by chatting up a hottie or signing up to be on the first beer pong team.

4. Steam Up Your Second Wind.

You’ve been up for hours, hanging out in the cold (and possibly rainy) weather. Beer is seeping out your pours. Take a long, hot, steamy shower. The hot water will wake you up and make you feel clean and ready to go again. Besides, staying fresh and clean might also help stave off the germs that’ll take their toll in flu form come Monday. AND you can always chug a beer in between shampooing and conditioning.

5. Powernap…Before it’s Too Late.

Positive you’re not going to make it? Throw in the towel early, and salvage the rest of your night. Taking a nap at 5 or 6 leaves plenty of time to sober up, recharge, and get ready to rage. If you keep drinking and try to make it to the post-party kickoff, you might crash at 9 or 10, only to sleep through the night and kick yourself in the a.m.

Sure, the champagne was five bucks a bottle (Andre!) and most everyone was either making out or hugging the toilet, but I still felt quite classy in my white dress and uh, red Solo cup of champagne.

It got me to thinking about the wide world outside of beer. Which led me to discover the “world’s first canned wine.”

Thanks to a Buenos Aires distributor, Iron Wine is introducing this fabulous new twist on tipsy. Bottoms up!

Who wouldn’t love another fun way to drink wine? After all, repetitive Franzia rounds of slap the bag can fizzle the fun. Now you can shotgun the vino!

Unfortunately, despite the brag roll on the can that claims you can just crack open and chug-a-lug, I’ve heard it actually has a bit of a tinny taste if you don’t pour it into a glass.

How bout you chickies try it out and let me know what you think? I’d do it myself, but I’m still sleeping off the champagne hangover.

Beware, not all booze is created equal.