The air is crisp, the dorms are abuzz with “I’m going home!” and my suitemate and I are—feverish. Literally.

What started off as the both of us coughing slightly like dainty ladies a week ago has morphed into some kind of psycho illness that left me hacking and feverish, making me miss a.) Kelly Cutrone giving an inspirational speech during this leadership workshop I was supposed to attend and b.) A sikk (but not sick like me) tailgate before the Yale-Princeton game.

Here’s my question: Why isn’t Mommy here to deliver me ice water and bring me up dinner from the kitchen to my room? Answer: Because I’m a freaking adult now! And I need to suck it up! Or else I’ll turn into, like, Lindsay Lohan or something and wallow in my own existence until bodyguards come and carry me everywhere I need to be.

So as a mature woman (pah, let’s be honest), I have been attempting to take care of myself as best as possible. After getting the whining, calls to my mother for some much needed sympathy and more whining, of course. I have been sleeping. I have been stealing grapefruit and oranges like crazy from the dining halls. I have been drinking lots of water (clear pee is the goal, you guys). I have been skipping class (…I don’t wanna infect other people).

And none of it is really helping.

The one thing that I found that is true is this: my illnesses last longer in college. And I think this has to do with the dining hall system vs. having a kitchen downstairs in your house where your mom makes food. The dining hall is a five minute trek in the cold away from my dorm room. That, in combination with the fact that it’s already dark outside, our dining halls have been serving excessive amounts of squash lately, and having a fever destroys your appetite, means that I have not been eating a lot. Which is good for my freshman fifteen, but terrible for the whole “getting healthy” thing.

It also doesn’t help that I’m in close (very close) quarters with another diseased person who keeps passing her germs to my side of the room. Part of me wants to Clorox the room every day…but a bigger and sicker part of me doesn’t want to get out of bed and muster up the energy to do so.

Regardless of all that, I’m slowly healing. Painfully slowly.  The coughs are beginning to sound a little less morbid and now my voice is raspy, so I kind of sound like Miley Cyrus. And that’s pretty cool. Plus, I’m seeing my mom in 3 days, which should jump start this healing process instantaneously. She’s already promised to have the soup and movies ready, which means I’ll be healthy as an ox (no, I don’t get that cliche either) by the time Thanksgiving dinner rolls around.

The flu sucks. There, I’ve gone and said it; plain and simple. It makes you feel gross, look gross and keeps you in bed all day (in a very different way than you’d want). Usually I’d be looking for any excuse to cuddle up with my favorite movie and relapse into a diet of soup and saltines, but not when it’s for weeks on end and makes you feel just plain shoddy.

It’s no fun having to constantly worry about keeping yourself in check and healthy (especially when you’re packed into college dorms and apartments like germ-infested sardines), so here are some simple and easy ways to integrate healthy actions into your daily life.

1. Wash your hands. Yes, I do sound like I’m your second grade teacher, but seriously. Just think about everything you touch throughout the day and how many germs are just lurking on your hands. Stick a little bottle of Purell on your key chain or in your handbag and you’re good to go!

2. Drink Water. Obviously water is key to staying healthy, but most of us don’t drink nearly enough as we should. Dehydration gives you body aches and headaches, so stay on top of it. Plus, water is phenomenal on its own for its bajillion health benefits. I mean, while preventing the flu you could be losing weight and improving your skin, among other things.

3. Vitamin C. If you don’t chug gallons of grapefruit juice (like myself), consider easy ways to slip some Vitamin C into your diet. My favorite way is to juice half of a lemon or lime (tip: microwave it – not kidding – or roll it around before you slice it up, it makes it juicier) and put it into a glass of ice water.

4. Sleep! As if I need another excuse to wake up at 2pm on a Sunday… A body that’s fatigued is significantly more susceptible to becoming ill than one who’s gotten lots of rest. Make sure you slip in those cat-naps between classes and go to bed early every once in a while, it all adds up.

5. Chill out on the alcohol and coffee. I can’t believe I even typed those words out, coming from a senior in college, but it’s true. Despite the fact that I’m currently nursing a venti hazelnut iced coffee from Starbucks, I know that caffeine is a major factor in dehydration. For every cup of coffee, make sure you consciously drink extra water, otherwise you’re just upping your chances of getting sick. As for alcohol itself, despite the late nights and random hookups it can lead to (and raise your chances of getting sick even more), it is also a dehydrating agent (hellooo, hangovers). Stay away from these two drinks if you’re trying to keep your head above water as finals week rapidly approaches.

6. Get a flu shot. I’m not a fan of needles at all, but my ten minutes of freaking out before is certainly worth the days and weeks of possibly getting sick down the road. Most university health centers offer flu shots to their students (sometimes even for free!). Though if your school doesn’t, many pharmacies offer them cheaply.

Just remember that doing little things throughout the day can help you stay healthy. Though some of these points may sound like common sense, they’re actions we often neglect to take. Paying a little more attention now could spare you weeks of discomfort and miserable social life in weeks to come.

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Life is full of difficult decisions. Do we work out or watch ’16 and Pregnant’? 9 am classes or class on Friday? Dollar beers or study for the exam that’s worth 30% of our grade?

And here’s another one. Yeah, it’s not pretty, but it’s more fun to think about this than actually start the reading that’s due tomorrow….

Would You Rather come down with the stomach flu the night of your absolute favorite band’s concert (to which you have front row seats) OR get a weird, unidentifiable rash covering most of your body the day before your week long summer trip to the beach?

Things to consider: front row freaking seats, barfing in public, itchy blisters in a bikini

What do you do?

No worries, there are tips to help you sick folk (and those of you who are just really tired and can’t stand the thought of putting on full makeup for an hour lecture). A few makeup tricks will have you looking less contagious and more flirtatious in no time.

Just try not to vom or cough on anyone or you’ll ruin the illusion.

Flash forward to now, and I still want to take care of him. Everything from helping him with his laundry to more serious stuff like going to therapy. Matt and I have been through a lot of tough times, and I’m glad to say that we’re still together and still going strong. We have our weak moments just like everyone else, but one of the true signs of a real relationship is staying with each other through the bad times, not just the good. Anybody can go with you to the party, but a man who really loves you will hold your hair while you’re puking.

Relationships have to be built on trust and love, and if that’s not there, then someone in the relationship is bound to be unhappy. You should want to be each other’s strengths when the other seems to be running out. You should want to lean on the other person when you can’t go it alone. And there’s nothing better than knowing you’ve got all of that if you ever need it.

If I didn’t have Matt around I’d probably have been a mess when my parents moved across the country. But no matter how much I miss them, it’s hard to feel like my family left me when I have him around.

I just know that no matter what it is, I will be there for him and he’ll be there for me. If he has to take a pill every day for the rest of his life, I’ll be there with a glass of water. If it gets to the point where we want to start a family I know he’ll be in the delivery room with me while I’m screaming my head off (and probably yelling at him for doing that to me).  I love him and I’ll do just about anything to keep him healthy and happy. When you are in a relationship, it really shows your partner’s character when they stick with you during the really crappy times. It’s nice to not to have to go through the hard days alone.

I'm getting nauseous just looking at this spread...

Unlike the rest of the world, Thanksgiving is my least-favorite holiday. I know, I know—the food, the laziness, the time off from work, the family (well . . . maybe that’s not such a plus)—what’s not to love?

For starters, I am a near vegetarian (I say “near” only because I will eat meat if other people prepare it for me) and I just plain dislike the taste of meat. So while the turkey is the main event for almost everyone I know, it kind of makes me wrinkle my nose. No, thank you.

I’m not above tolerating a meal I don’t like for one day out of the year, but the smell of Thanksgiving food cooking actually makes me feel slightly nauseous. This isn’t just because of the turkey—it’s a long story. (Warning: If you are of the weak stomach, I’d recommend you stop reading now.)

In seventh grade, my family hosted an exchange student from Germany for a couple of weeks in the fall, and we thought it would be fun to make a “practice” Thanksgiving dinner to share with her while she was there so she could experience a new holiday.

I was psyched because I loved Thanksgiving food at the time, and even though my stomach felt a little funny early in the day, I ignored it so I could eat as much of my dad’s delicious Thanksgiving food as possible. This, it turned out, was a terrible mistake. My stomach started feeling worse and worse as the day wore on, and finally I decided to try to down some Pepto-Bismol. I managed to only taste it before my stomach had had enough and proceeded to empty its entire contents… all over the dining-room table. I can’t even explain how traumatizing this was. It’s bad enough to get sick in a place where you don’t have to stare at everything you ate earlier, but to have everyone see what you ate earlier, well, it was quite distressing.

I was really sick for a couple of days, and ever since then, the appeal of Thanksgiving has just been lost to me. I try to hide in my room when the aromas of stuffed turkey, gravy, potatoes, and cranberries drift nearby, but even a stray whiff makes me feel ill. So for the last few years, I’ve just tried to avoid Thanksgiving altogether—a couple of years ago, I went camping with my boyfriend over Thanksgiving weekend, and the following year we prepared a lamb biryani Indian dish. This year, I’m thankfully dating a vegetarian, so he also has no interest in the traditional Thanksgiving spread. We plan to make roasted-vegetable lasagna, and for that, I truly can feel thankful.

FML.

You roll out from underneath your covers to turn off your alarm clock. You’ve got a very busy day ahead of you: three classes, a group meeting and a date with your roommates to catch up on Glee from the past three weeks. Everything has been so busy lately you haven’t had time to eat a meal, let alone get your weekly dose of Finn. If you’re not sleeping, you’re in class, and if you’re not there you’re in the library, oftentimes well past midnight.

And it’s finally catching up to you.

As you try to rouse yourself out of bed, you feel it. Your head hurts, you can’t swallow and your whole body just feels achy. You walk to the bathroom to wash up, hoping it’s just one of those “I slept with my mouth open” deals; it will go away in a few minutes.

Only it doesn’t. In fact, bending over the sink to splash some water on your face makes you dizzy and angers the little men pounding hammers against the inside of your skull. It’s official: you’re sick.

“Oh god. Could it be Swine Flu??”

You crawl back to your room and sit down at your computer. You enter your symptoms into WebMD figure out your diagnosis/rule out any deadly diseases. You learn that you either have the flu… or meningitis. Either way, you need to take your temperature, which you cannot do since you don’t have a thermometer. Maybe you can just sleep it off?

Before getting back into bed, you send a quick email your professors/group members/roommates to let them know that you are sick. You do not mention the word “flu”; you don’t need anyone sending you to the Swine Flu quarantine, thankyouverymuch.

Your body is really hurting now so you shut your computer and climb back into bed. You’re thirsty, you’re achy and, dammit, you want your mom. So you call her. Yeah, she’s over 6 hours away, but at least she’ll tell you what to do… and feel bad for you.

And feel bad she does. She tells you to drink lots of fluids, get lots of rest and call her when you wake up. Even though you knew all of those things, just talking to her makes you feel a little better. You hang up, roll over and go back to sleep.

When you wake up a few hours later you’re feeling worse. You try to drink some water but you can’t swallow. And forget eating; even the thought of a piece of toast makes your stomach churn. You debate going to the health center; those “doctors” a joke and that requires getting dressed and walking across campus. But what other choice do you have? You call your mom.

After getting a sufficient amount of pity and love from mama (“Oh honey, you know I’d bring you soup if I was there.”), you decide to go to the doctor. You pull on your biggest sweats, put your hair up in a ponytail, throw on your glasses and head out. You look like crap and you know it, but you don’t care. As unflattering as those men’s sweatpants are, you still feel a hell of a lot worse than you look. As you walk past other students laughing on their way to class you silently curse the world, asking the guy upstairs why you have to be sick. And why is the health center so far away? And why does everything hurt so badly?

Eventually you make it, sign in and sit down in the room full of coughing students, closing your eyes in hopes it will make your headache go away. 45 minutes and two phone calls to mom later, the doctor calls you in. She spends 6 minutes examining you – which includes questions on your sexual history for some reason – then tells you it’s the flu, there’s nothing she can do and you just need lots of fluid and lots of rest. Then she places her gloved hand on the small of your back and pushes you out of her office so she can let the next sickling in.

You call your mom again on the way home to whine a little more. Then again when you’re back in bed. Then again when your roommate brings you chicken soup that isn’t nearly as good as hers. Then you turn off the phone, dive under your covers and fall asleep. At 7 p.m. Missing yet another week of Glee.

Yeah, we’ve all been there.
There is nothing quite like being sick to make you hate your life and miss your mommy.

As college students, we are constantly inundated with new knowledge. It can be useful, thought-provoking, or crammed into our head on a Starbucks-fueled binge several hours before an exam. However, very rarely do we question the validity of all this new knowledge (unless you take philosophy classes, then you’ll question away).

That’s where College Candy comes in. We’re not going to debate whether or not the Theory of Relativity actually exists (a disappointment, I know, but I’m a communications major and stopped taking science classes after Baby Bio fresh year). However, we are here to thoroughly investigate the most widespread college knowledge (no, not rhyming): the myth.

This week, I’ve been busy with preparations for my 21^st birthday party on Saturday (FINALLY). Amidst trying to find a free party bus and a hot pink dress right after everyone’s Fall colors came out, I began to stress about the optimal level of intoxication I’m aiming for (somewhere in between taking over the DJ booth and being escorted out of the club). I don’t want to be too drunk, but I know I’ll be surrounded by people trying very hard to get me very wasted. I thought to myself, “Well, I’ll start with a few rounds of shots, then downgrade to flip cup and beer pong to mellow myself out.”

There it is, the golden rule. Liquor before beer and you’re in the clear! The thing is, I know this isn’t true, I knew on my 16^th birthday that this “rule” was BS. The amount of alcohol you drink—not the type and not the order in which you drink it—determines how drunk you get.

But how has this myth persisted for so long if so much scientific evidence proves it’s false? Well, for me at least, personal experience holds much more weight than whatever the people in lab coats have to say. And my personal experience has taught me that beer before liquor almost always leaves me sicker. So why the huge disagreement between the scientists and the drunk people? Let’s examine this logically.

If you start the night out with a shot and a few mixed drinks, you’re well aware that you need to pace yourself (most of the time). You space out your Long Island Iced Teas evenly, or perhaps drink water in between them (OK, I’ve never actually done that). Once the bottles run out, you mosey on over to the keg to enjoy some quality Natty Lite. You continue drinking at the same rate you were before, and spend the rest of the night being witty and charming before making out with that hot lacrosse player you beat at beer pong.

But what if that equation were reversed? Science tells us that you and the lacrosse player still would have been good to go, seeing as how your 12 oz. beer contains the same amount as your 1.5 oz. shot of liquor. Unfortunately for you, the liquor is absorbed much more quickly than the beer (especially if it’s mixed with anything carbonated).

So if you start out filling up your Solo cup every 5 minutes with beer, you’ll probably continue that pace when you switch to mixed drinks…and end up drinking way too much, way too fast. Goodbye #42; the only thing you’ll be kissing tonight is your toilet.

Come Saturday, I will feel free to accept shots from various people at any point in the evening, regardless of how many keg stands I may or may not have already done. The key to my new drinking plan? Have my mom help me keep track of how much I’ve drank (yeah, she’s comin’ to the party!) and switch to water for a while if I feel myself crashing and burning.

The liquor before beer myth is definitely, definitely false, so drink away and in any order (just pace yourself!).

So finally it is spring…well, at least the snow is sort of melting here, and the temperature is starting to average above freezing during the day. This is the time to be outside on the slushy grass or walking around campus, right?

Well, I wish. It seems like spring at college, I am realizing, is the time of the cold, the headache, the sore throat, and the contagious undergrads.

I’ve noticed everyone here is getting sick. I’m told it’s because I’ve never lived with so many people before, and that we’re all staying inside so much. Basically, germs are running wild. So drink your orange juice for Vitamin C and avoid sneezing classmates. Not that any of that really worked out well for me. And I must say, I’ve learned a very important lesson: taking care of yourself when you’re sick at college is the worst.

Despite feeling like death-slightly-warmed-over, I still have to get up and go to class, or at least go downstairs to get food. Unlike home, I don’t get chicken noodle soup and crackers (served to me in bed), but whatever is on the menu. All the way downstairs. Nope, there is no change in food or service just because I’m ill.

I have to get my own water, walk all the way down the hall to go to the bathroom, and share my room with a healthy person who is avoiding me like I have the plague. Which, thankfully, I don’t. Just a cold, and sore throat, and sinus headache and fever.

Even if I were home, with my family waiting on me hand and food, this week would’ve sucked. But at college, it’s even worse: I have to deal with it myself. I have to get myself to the health center if I think I need it, I have to walk to the pharmacy in town if I need a prescription, and I have to deal with the fact that everyone else on campus is dealing with this too, so no one is there to help me.

All that responsibility and independence I have loved at college has just become a nuisance.

Sure, I’m getting better. Somewhere between watching episodes of  House and making up fake diagnoses I began to recover. And I am grateful, because now I know that being sick is work here. It’s not a day-off or a sick day from school where you can just chill and relish in your bacteria. Life doesn’t stop when you get sick in college.

I guess that whole “college independence” isn’t so great when all you want to do is depend on getting better. There is nothing like a cold to make every college kid wish they were back home with mom.