Ever hear the story of the ugly duckling? No? Let me refresh you then. The Ugly Duckling is quite simple a story about an ugly duck. Nobody wanted the ugly duck. Not the mother, not the brothers, not the other birds, not even the gross geese. So the poor ugly duckling ran away from his home to live by himself. At the pond where he made his new home, he would longingly stare at the swans, wishing he could look as majestic and beautiful as them. Until one day, after spending months in a chicken coop and then escaping almost being cooked alive, he returned to the pond and saw his reflection. He was finally beautiful. He was a swan… What a bunch of bull s***.

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I just spent 15 minutes trying to figure out something smart to say about this, but the pink camouflage is too distracting.

…Also the correlation between a weapon of death and women who have “the caring heart and tenderness of good wives, mothers, sisters, and daughters.” That’s distracting too.

Here are two things I know to be true; Penelope Cruz is hot, and helping family members succeed in life is awesome.

Here are two more things I know to be true; just because one family member is talented, doesn’t mean everyone else in that family got the gene, and two sisters making out—no matter how good-looking they are, is majority creepy.

The UK magazine The Sun is reporting that in an attempt to get famous fast, Penelope Cruz’s brother, Eduardo Cruz (who will now be know as “Sketchy Cruz”), has put his two sisters in his new music video—making out.

In the video, Penelope and Monica play sexy sound-dub artists who are putting the finishing touches on a lesbian porn tape. Something about the porn, plus Sketchy Cruz’s typical pop music sound, gets these two so riled up that they can’t help acting out their sexual tension.

Now matter how hard I wish I was, I’m not making this up.

But wait! The story gets even weirder. Read More »

The Veronicas: Hook Me Up

Today’s as good a day as any to post a cheesy video, right? Sometimes I love music like this, it puts a smile on my face. You too? Get it here!

I don’t know if any of you saw The Hills this week, but if you did manage to catch it, did you notice something unusual?

There was an entire commercial break dedicated to Erin Fetherston’s new line debuting at Target on November 18th! Talk about creating a buzz and “targeting” (sorry, I had to) your demographic!

That said, I may or may not be leaving the city and heading to my parents house in Pennsylvania this weekend. I may or may not be doing so to do a little pre-Black Friday shopping.

This may or may not involve a trip to a (huge) Target store in Delaware in order to land a few pieces from the new line.

Don’t call me pathetic! First of all, it’s smart so don’t hate. Two, if you know anything about New York City you know that Targets do exist (in the Bronx and Queens…no thanks) but like many urban superstores, they are so picked through that there’s no way I’d find anything. Especially in my size.

Why am I making this seemingly useless trip? Well, have you seen the line? It’s absolutely adorable. But not in a little girl way. It’s really just effortless and playful…exactly my style. Read More »

Tegan and Sarah: The Con

Check out the twin duo’s video for their single “The Con”. Or download it here!