While Halloween now is more closely associated with finding a (slutty) costume and drinking Halloween inspired beverages, as a kid, there was nothing better than going door to door loading up on enough candy to last you till the 4th of July.Only problem is, my mom – the smart woman that she is – knew her life would be torturous through July if she let her three hyper children keep that much sugar around.

So every year, my two older brothers and I would have to dump all of our coveted, prized candy into the middle of the table. My mother then carefully separated the candy into piles – Milky Ways in one pile, Twix in another, Candy Corn in another, and so on. She then handed a bucket to each of us and, one by one, we would go around taking our pick and filling our buckets.

Once they were filled, the rest of the candy went to inner-city kids whose neighborhoods were too dangerous to trick-or-treat in (which now I see was a very noble thing but at the time I couldn’t understand why they deserved my candy gold. After all, I spent three long hours in the cold with clown makeup on my face, saying stupid poems at people’s doors while they filled my bag up with all that deliciousness). Read More »

If I look out my living room window I can see American Apparel. When I peruse my favorite websites, I am bombarded with the girls only partially dressed in American Apparel clothes. When I need a white tank top because I spilled salsa on mine, I head to the nearest American Apparel.

In other words, I know American Apparel.

Their stores are chock full of ridiculous things I would never wear, but they also happen to carry some seriously awesome essentials. You may have to pick through the sparkly unitards to find em, but they are most definitely worth the work. Don’t know what to look for? That’s why I am here.

I give you: The Best Things (EVER) at American Apparel. Read More »

I’m not a big make-up girl. I mean, I don’t really leave the house without a little bit of blush and eyeliner and tinted lip balm, but any kind of heavy concealer or shadow looks stupid on me, and I always, always, always get that shit in my eyes. No matter what. Mascara is also my enemy.

Thank god I have long enough eyelashes, because I just can’t bare the old stinging sensation when it somehow manages (and it always does) to get into my contacts.

But for all my naturalistic ways, I can’t say I’d be happy with using Skittles and Crystal Light to make myself pretty. Thank God I have the freedom to go to the drugstore. The inmates at the Charlotte County Jail aren’t so lucky. They’ve gotta improvise.

“We get some hair grease stuff and put it on our lips.” An inmate recently told reporters, “The ink pens that I have, we use as the eyeliner. This is coffee, the eye shadow. We use the glitter from cards, so thank goodness people send cards with glitter on them.” Read More »