Why does it matter how many people someone has had sex with?

In the world of journalism, that, my friends, is called a question lede. I’m supposed to spend the rest of this article trying to answer that question, but honestly I can’t make any promises. You see, that question has been in my mind for a while now, and I can’t seem to figure it out. Why do people care about someone’s “magic number,” and why is a person’s morality level judged by how many sexual partners they’ve had?

Historically speaking, it’s understandable why chastity and virginity were important. Without any kind of protection, getting pregnant or catching a disease was very much a reality. Virginity was maintained until marriage because no one wanted to catch a disease from their future spouse. Which is fair enough, really.

But those reasons are mainly invalid in modern times; we have condoms to save us from diseased genitals and unwanted fetuses. So long as sex is protected, it really shouldn’t matter how many people have been involved. Sex with multiple partners (not necessarily at the same time…) is often frowned upon as being immoral and looked at as being a “sin of the flesh” – but what is so immoral about it? No one is getting hurt and no one is being damaged. So long as the people involved are consenting and protected, there really is nothing immoral about it. Read More »

It wasn’t until I stopped having sex that I realized how sexualized everything has become. Every TV show, every movie, every magazine picture, and every song is some way related to sex. To quote Superbad, “You know what kinds of foods are shaped like dicks? The BEST kinds.” It’s true, phallic (and yonic) symbols are everywhere (and a lot more noticeable when you’re not getting laid) – thanks a lot for that, Freud.

I’m going through what some may call a dry spell. While that’s half-true, I’d like to say it’s more of a self-imposed period of celibacy. Spending the last month and a half in my hometown (where there are ZERO prospects, by the way) and slowly-but-surely losing faith in the male species has lead me to decide that making a conscious decision to take a break from sex will save me not only from sleeping around but also from making any spur-of-the-moment bad decisions.

Well, ladies and gentlemen, it turns out that going without is not quite as easy as I first expected. Due to my current living situation, it hasn’t only been sex that’s been put on the back burner, but also masturbation and any other kind of physical intimacy (except for those nights when my best friend Emma lets me spoon her… that’s nice). Read More »

Just in case you thought that guy was lying when he revealed he had slept with more people than you, a recent study by the federal government shows that men still have more sexual partners than women.

The nationwide survey found “29 percent of American men report having 15 or more female sexual partners in a lifetime, while only 9 percent of women report having sex with 15 or more men”. A rough translation? The average amount of lifetime sexual partners for guys is 7, while the average for women is 4. Read More »

When I was a virgin, and apparently a huge (and at that moment tipsy) bitch, I called one of my best friends a slut. And it wasn’t a friendly “Hey, Slut!” but more like “Hey, you’re kind of a slut.” Heinous, I know. But at that moment, in my pre-sex virginal delusion, I had no idea. No idea what it was like to have sex, to not find the right person, to experience something amazing and really want to try it again.

Of course, now I understand. I understand why she was so angry and why I was so out of line. Now that my number far exceeds hers (and it has for a while), I wonder what—besides my obvious sexual frustration—made me think I had any right to judge her number.

I know my friends could rightly call me a slut, and in a way they wouldn’t be wrong. I have done my fair share of sleeping around and I can’t deny it. The funny thing is, I judge, or have judged people on their own sexual statistics. Read More »

Must be a misprint, right? Actually, no. Turns out, a new study shows that female cheetahs are sluts. Yep, according to the article, “new research shows nearly half of their litters are made up of cubs with different fathers.” That’s pretty impressive work. Of course, all this sex obviously comes at a price, as researchers claim that the cheating cheetahs find themselves more exposed not only to predators as they seek out new partners, but to diseases as well. Sort of makes me feel better that humans aren’t the only creatures that can be punished for enjoying life’s sexual pleasures more often then perhaps we should be.

For me, this brings up an interesting question. Diseases notwithstanding (and I know it’s hard to completely disregard that consequence), would girl sleep around more if it were more socially acceptable? In my opinion, the chief reason that most girls aren’t as “slutty” as their male counterparts is just that: the word slut, and other such derogatory terms.

Everyone knows at this point about the sick double standard that differentiates guys and girls and their respective sexual habits. Guys who get around receive accolades from their friends, and pick up reputations as players and general badasses (note: this is not always the case, as I’m now carrying around a reputation of being a bit of a slut myself). But if a girl sleeps around, and people find out about it, the girl is usually labeled as a slut or whore, and she gets made fun of incessantly behind her back by both guys and her fellow girls (way to stick together, ladies). Read More »