The Tucker Max Double Standard

tucker max thumbMy opinion of Tucker Max is complex. While I can’t say I agree with his choice of lifestyle,  I did read his book, I Hope They Serve Beer in Hell, recommended it to others and have it listed as one of my favorite books on Facebook. To be honest, I thought it was hysterical and could see myself writing a similar book. If one more person says I should be “the female Tucker Max,” I’m going to have to start rethinking my life choices.

But after I have seen writers on CollegeCandy post in a Tucker Max-esque fashion and get bashed for it, I have been turned me off to the idea of writing my own book altogether.  And the comments on CollegeCandy’s recent post on Tucker Max only added fuel to the flame, as readers uncharacteristically turned the other cheek to his antics. The writer’s opinion was that Max and his antics are misogynistic and simply not funny. But the majority of the comments on the post begged to differ.

“I read every single story on the Tucker Max website about 4 years ago…and they were hilarious to me. And I’m a girl with self-respect who would never want to be someone featured in a story like that, but I don’t feel bad for those women. It was their decision to sleep with him and he happened to get some great stories out of it. I understand that a lot of people don’t appreciate smut humor..but obviously a lot of people do (including A LOT of girls considering that at least half his fan base consists of them).” Read More »

Having Sex Does Not Make Us Slutty

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I like sex. A lot. And while I consider myself to be fairly sexually experienced, I can count my sexual partners on one hand, and the vast majority of my experiences were with someone I was in a long-term relationship with. I am not a slut.

I’ve been seeing the word “slut” thrown around so much lately and I find it totally misleading. According to the Oxford English Dictionary, a slut is “a slovenly or promiscuous woman” — in other words, a dirty woman who has sex with a multitude of different partners.

I’ve noticed that there are a few CollegeCandy commenters who target our writers as sluts because they’re sharing their experiences. To those people, I say – have an open mind. Like everything else in this life, everyone has different sexual needs. Some people feel that sex should be shared between two people after marriage, and a person should only have one partner their entire life. Others feel that having one sexual partner for life is impractical and unfulfilling. I challenge you to believe that both are okay. Read More »

Dude! Why I Sometimes Wish I Was a Guy

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It was a feeling that started with the Ocean’s 11 movie franchise, and then Judd Apatow came along and just knocked it into next week: sometimes I just wish I was part of the boy’s club. I want to drink martinis or beer and talk about chicks and make dirty jokes with my friends all day!

Okay, I’m kidding. Well, half kidding, anyway. It does sound like fun.  But more to the point, it got me thinking about gender roles in a broader sense (because why don’t I like girl’s club movies, a la SATC and Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants, in the same way?) and I reached the same conclusion: “damn, sometimes I wish I was a guy!”

Women’s roles have changed a lot in recent generations, and for that we can all be very, very grateful.  But there are certain things that get me all hot and bothered in the penis envy department. Let’s start with the simple ones: Read More »

Oh The People You’ll Meet: The Frat House Groupie

fraternitygroupies.jpg So, the thing about most of the annoying people on campus is that, most of the time, you can get away from them. Either you pass the class and move on, you simply ignore their sermons, or they generally exit your life just as quickly as they came.

Not all of them, though. Some annoying campus dwellers will be there. Always. Forever. And never go away.

Who am I talking about? Why, the  Frat House Groupie, of course!

Now, there are many girls who may seem to fall into this category that should not. These are:

1) Members of a sister sorority. It’s super common to see certain fraternities pairing up with certain sororities on campus; their bylaws/campus rules/international standards of fraternizing require that they have to make nice with the girlies and co-host events together.  Whatev.  Point is, if you’re hanging at the house one Friday night because they’re having an awesome 70s themed costume party and you see the typical group of sorority girls, those are the least of your worries.

2) Girlfriends or ex girlfriends of frat boys: These girls are expected to be there. After all, they aren’t just trolling the crowd looking for booty; this is their man’s house. Or their ex man. And they are still friends with all the boys. Read: they know people.

Now that we have that out of the way, let’s move into the girls you should be wary of. There are generally two types of Frat House Groupies: Read More »

Sexy Time: The Aftermath of Holiday Hookups

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In my last blog, I wrote about the splendors of holiday hookups. (If you haven’t read it yet, get on it!) Now that most of us have exhausted the extent of our winter break hook-ups, I thought I’d take a second look at this most treasured of holiday traditions. As it turns out, there are a few things that actually can go wrong…

The Parent Thing: Even though we’ve moved out, most of us hate the thought of our parents knowing anything about our sex lives. This proves to be a huge problem when you’re actually hooking up under their roof. Nothing makes you feel like you’re back in high school more than tip-toeing through your house with a guy in tow. If you stay at his house, on the other hand, you run the risk of being discovered by his Mom and becoming “that slut” that’s sleeping with her baby.

The Small Town Thing: No matter how big of a city you live in, you can’t deny that we live in a very, very small world. And nothing proves that more true than a hometown hookup rumor spreading like a wildfire. I swear, once one person finds out and spills the beans, it’s all over. You can bet by the end of the week anybody and everybody, from his Mom to your 8th grade woodshop teacher, will know of your little rendezvous(s). Or, if you’re like me and accidentally leave a hickey on his neck, you don’t even need anybody to say anything for the entire world to know. My bad. Read More »

Halloween Costume Ideas That Don’t Require You to Look Like a Total Whore

halloween1.jpgI cannot lie – I am that girl who has used Halloween as an excuse to completely hooch it up.

My best friend even has a Top 10 Melissa Tramp Outfits, and there are easily three Halloween costumes on there. (Editor’s Note: So 70% of those outfits were a normal day? Awesome.)

So, in order to keep myself off any Tramp lists this year, I decided to seek out non-slutty alternatives to my typical Halloween looks. After all, I’d much rather be recognized for my creativity than my boobs on October 31st this year.

Shocking, I know. Read More »

Hey, I’ve Seen You Naked…Nice Weather We’re Having

worried-girl.jpgJust because you’ve finally hooked up with someone, doesn’t mean anything has been solidified or any questions have been answered. In fact, the love sesh may have raised even more questions: was it good? Was it just a fling, or were there feelings involved? Is it going to happen again? Should you regret it? Does he regret it? Can you go back in time and pretend it never happened?

Depending on the relationship you had with the guy before the hook-up; the scenarios in which you’ll interact after the hook-up; and how much discussion you had before, during, and after the hook-up, the first “reunion” can be totally smooth, or completely cringe-worthy. And, for the record, the first reunion does not include your first words the morning after when both of you are still in bed…naked…and possiby still drunk.

How do you deal? If your first meeting with your last fling falls into one of the following categories, you need to work on your post-play approach.

1. The Awkward Aversion

You don’t know how he feels, and if it means avoiding rejection, you’re fine not knowing. You may respond to his presence by interrupting someone else’s conversation to avoid having to talk to him, fumbling with your phone to appear busy, or simply leaving the room. This will come off as either immature or disinterested. If he does like you and you blatantly ignore him, he’ll think you regret it. Unlike girls who want what they can’t have, guys are more likely to give up if you’ve bruised their ego. If you do like him, I suggest developing a different method. Read More »

MR. RIGHT Isn’t Gonna Care About My ‘Number’

Once upon a time, I cared a whole lot about my number of sexual partners. I remember hearing a girl in high school tell me she had slept with 5 people, 5 whole people, and I remember thinking, ‘WHOA!!! What a slut! I’m never going to have sex with that many people! Ever!” But, you see, that was when I was religious and very into the idea of marriage…and the idea of waiting for the ‘right one’.

So, I waited for the right one. Two years later, after we’d finally had sex, I knew he wasn’t really the one for me. It was like pushing the Go button on our sexual relationship facilitated him finally showing me who he really was. I maintained some faith and made another guy who was ‘the one’ wait. He broke up with me the day after I finally slept with him; four months into our relationship.

I started to really doubt there was a ‘ONE’ for me. But I still really wanted sex. I longed for it. I didn’t want to be tangled up in emotions anymore. I didn’t want to be a part of the pursuit of my perfect match anymore. I didn’t want to be in love. I didn’t want any of THAT anymore. I just wanted to still have sex. You know why? Cause I thought sex felt really good. Read More »

Juicy Campus: What Do Your Classmates Really Think of You?

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Let’s face it: We LOVE to gossip. We gossip about friends and we gossip about foes. Such idle talk allows us to convey information quickly, although not always accurately. This being said, it is no surprise that the website Juicy Campus has been increasing in popularity since it was founded on August 1, 2007.

When my friends first introduced me to Juicy Campus, I wrote it off as another place for people to share their college exploits online. But I quickly realized that this site was different; I actually knew the people that were being discussed! Friends, classmates, hookups—no one was free from the wrath of this critical group. Let’s just put it this way, if the “Burn Book” from Mean Girls was published online for all to see and comment on, I would imagine it would look similar to Juicy Campus.

The site was created by Mark Ivester, a Duke University Alum, with “the simple mission of enabling online anonymous free speech on college campuses.” (Editor’s Note: That’s a nice way to refer to sh*t talking!) There are currently 64 colleges listed on the site, including many prestigious institutions such as Harvard, UPenn, and Brown. The topics on the site range from the innocent (“Best Frat on Campus”) to the scandalous (“Sex with Professors”). Each post gets a rating ranging from 0% Juicy to 100% Juicy, so the juicier the gossip, the better the rating. Read More »

Hallmates from Hell, Part 1

sorority-cuties-spanking.jpgWe’ve all been there: the noisy hallmate, the rude hallmate, the one that leaves the bathroom messy or is playing loud music during exam week. But this past year all the forces of evil converged on one hall and ended up giving me the truly infernal hallmate experience. Read on, and pray you never have as bad luck as I did!

Things didn’t seem to be getting off on a good foot when I discovered myself and my boyfriend, also on the same hall, were completely surrounded by freshmen. We were juniors, with a buttload of junior independent work to get done in the course of the year, and we didn’t have as much patience for freshmen shenanigans as in the past. But still, we vowed to be good sports. The freshmen started things off with a bang by constantly converging in the hall right in front of my door to chatter loudly about inane subjects. On weekend nights, the music coming out of their rooms shook the floors, no matter how many times we asked them to turn it down.

The girls decided to label me as a spoil-sport because of this polite request, and insisted on giving me dirty looks in the bathroom. They continually stole the chalk from my chalkboard, left dirty dishes in the sink of the kitchen, and had atrocious hygiene when it came to disposing of sanitary items. That, however, was only the beginning. Read More »