The Cure For Camel Toe and 10 Celebs Who Need It

I wouldn’t exactly say it’s a coincidence that these new Camelflage panties came out just as the number of camel toes seems to be rising at an exponential rate. They’re everywhere! At the MTV movie awards, standing next to me on the subway – heck, at this point, I wouldn’t be surprised if I saw a few on the soccer field at the World Cup this Saturday.

And it doesn’t take a rocket scientist to figure out what’s to blame for all this camel toe chaos. It’s those freakin’ rompers and jumpsuits everyone seems to love so much! One could easily take a cheap shot at Lady Gaga and blame her for popularizing these vag-hugging-suits that are now plaguing Miley, Xtina, Rihanna, Katy Perry etc. but I will do no such thing! I think everyone’s forgetting the days of Britney’s red catsuit from the “Oops I Did it Again” video. Why not point a finger in that pleathery direction?

After spending the last 45 minutes of my life looking at pictures of celebrity’s camel toes, it’s really starting to make me self-conscious. Does the plastic jumpsuit I keep in my closet for those very special occasions (read: Halloween and weddings) similarly reveal a definable outline of my lady parts? Or how about those jeggings I throw on when I can’t seem to fit into my skinny jeans? Do they too expose a frontal wedgie (A.K.A. a fredgie)?

Maybe it wouldn’t hurt to invest in a pair of camelflaging panties. And while I’m at it, perhaps I should pick up a few pairs for these revealing Hollywood ladies. I’m pretty sure I’d get some sort of Nobel Prize for my contribution to society. Read More »


The Love List: Bangs, Elections and Little Knowles

love1.jpgI love to love things. It’s true. So much so that I used to say “Love You” on my voicemail – until my friends instructed me that not only is it not true (“Do you LOVE your Dr’s office who calls to confirm your appointment?”), but that it was also a tad creepy to the strangers calling to leave messages on my phone.

So I changed it. And focused my love on other things. A now – for your benefit – I will bring you a weekly Love List. On all things I love. Because if I love them – well then obviously you may love them too. And there was once a song that said what the world needs now is love sweet love. So sweet love I will bring to thee.

My love list for October 4th, 2008:

1. The word Adore. I don’t know why, but I LOVE this word. Lately I’ve replaced the word “love” with “adore.” As in, “I Adore pay day,” or “I absolutely ADORE that Marc Jacobs bag (but not adoring the not-so-adorable price tag),” or “I don’t care if Jeremy Piven is a shmuck – girls have been drawn to them for ages – why stop now? And, therefore, I adore him.” Read More »