College Candy

Ahh summer time. The heat is blistering, the Natty Lite is chilled and the pool beckons. For those of us not taking summer classes, these three months are a glorious break from homework, studying and fluorescent lighting. Yes, the whole summer yawns out blue skies and cut-offs until late August and it’s hard to imagine ever going back to school.

Except, I do imagine it. I catch myself worrying about non-existent assignments and responsibilities that won’t resume until September. But even more, I constantly find myself spacing out at work, reminiscing about all the good stuff that comes along with college. Mostly the whole not-bored-at-work-9-to-5 thing.

And I miss it!

Meal Plans: While I’m lucky enough not to be taking classes this summer, I do have to work — which means I’m stuck in a college town all summer long without the benefit of visiting home, and therefore the benefit of home cookin’. My freshman year, I ate dining hall food. My sophomore year, my sorority dues included a meal plan. This summer, with my sorority house closed and the dining halls freshmen-infested, I’m armed only with my apartment’s kitchen and whatever the hell I find when I Google “easy, cheap, healthy recipes” and pudding. Do I enjoy learning to cook? Absolutely. Would I prefer a cook to prepare my meals? Uh, hell yes. Plus, there’s no clean up if you’re not the one using all the dishes… Read More »

I have never thought of myself as a “sorority girl.” Like many people, when I thought of the term “sorority girl” I didn’t have a whole lot of positive connotations. I thought they were fake, perky, skanky, High School queen bees, who did a lot of partying and a lot of drugs.

Okay, so I guess I let Hollywood feed me that stereotype.

However, once I started freshman year I started meeting some great girls (who were none of those stereotypical adjectives) and who were also in sororities. The contrast baffled me, so I decided to investigate.

Sororities are pretty big on my campus and something like 35% of girls go Greek. That fact and all the nice girls I had met led me to sign myself up for the 2 week long process of rush. My floor friends all signed up too, but I was still pretty iffy about the idea. I told a few home friends and their reaction was…well less than enthusiastic. I got responses like; “Are you serious?” “Why would you do that to yourself?” and “You are not a sorority girl!” Even my mom, who went Greek in college, said that it might not be for me. These people were the people that knew me best, so I thought that they were probably right, and I prepared to pull my name off the list of about 700 girls. Read More »

When I am not out slutting it up, I tend to spend my evenings alone watching TV, reading books and – to relieve a little stress – playing out some super sexy scenarios in my head. I crawl into bed, get under the covers with my favorite toy and imagine myself in the place I’d rather be; the man I’d rather be with.

I find sexual fantasies to be both extremely liberating and enlightening. By opening myself up to any possibility – mostly things I would never do in the flesh – I learn a lot about myself and what turns me on. I can act out entire scenarios in my head and prepare myself for new situations that may arise sometime down the road. And, of course, I get to do something a little naughty with people I would never have the opportunity to be with in real life.

Like the dad of the kids I babysit for. I know that fantasy is as cliché as they come, but there is something so sexy and forbidden about that bond between babysitter and dad. He is sexy, smart, funny, and adorable with his kids. I know it’s so wrong, but I can’t help but wonder what it would be like to have him drive me home, kiss me, then take advantage of me in the back of his Mercedes. Read More »

When I was pledging my sorority Freshman year – for 10 freaking weeks – all I could think about was the day it would all end; I would be a full-fledged member of the house and I wouldn’t have to get the older girls ice cream at 3am, carry cigarettes around for them just in case they might need one while they were out on campus, or have to sleep on the floor of a very cold sorority house every weekend. I was absolutely miserable, but I always knew that there was a bright light at the end of the tunnel (read: date parties and a private cook!) and it would all be worth it in the end.

It may seem crazy to put yourself through hell to join a group, but there is a purpose to pledge term: group bonding and appreciation as you work towards something. I worked hard with my pledge class to succeed at many (mostly ridiculous) tasks, which eventually ended with a very large and exciting payoff.

Payoff being the operative word. Because why else would someone slave away like a dog for weeks without any sort of payoff – unless, of course, they were into all that S&M shit?

Maybe we should ask the people over at Princeton. One of the residential colleges over there recently started a new “program” (service, really) for seniors working on their theses. Obviously, writing a thesis is super duper hard (which is why I decided not to do one, naturally) so someone thought it would be a great idea to offer those thesis-ites a little help. Read More »