Really angry.

And here are just 5 of the things that make my want to throw something. Like my Macbook. But I stop myself, because it’s not her fault. And she’s just so pretty and shiny and wonderful… Well, when that rainbow beachball pinwheel thing doesn’t pop up every 3 minutes.

1. Those who don’t properly utilize the BCC
Come on, people. BCC was invented for a reason and that reason was to eliminate the firestorm of emails that comes from those morons who can’t tell the difference between “reply” and “reply to all.” Don’t risk getting 150 emails (50% of which are people complaining about those who reply to all) in response to your “Sunday Funday” email invitation and just use the BCC. PLEASE.

2. Those who don’t know the difference between “Reply” and “Reply to all”
See above. You’re making lots of enemies, reply-to-all-ers. Watch your back.

3. Those who update their status 24/7
Oh, you’re eating eggs for breakfast? You’re in the shower?
Two words: nobody cares.
And really, how do you have time to do all that when you’re spending all your time telling me what you’re doing!?

4. Those who don’t IM back
You can pretend you weren’t near your phone when I texted you, but that doesn’t work in the IM world. I know you’re there. If you weren’t, your name would be gray. Or there would be a little moon next to it. Or an orange dot. But there isn’t. There’s a green dot and green means go, and go means IM me back when I IM you!

5. Those who have full conversations on Facebook walls
Maybe I’m alone in this one, but I believe strongly that Facebook walls are not for full blown conversations. That’s what Facebook messages are for. Or emails. Or, I don’t know, phones. If you want to catch up on your 7th grade choir friend’s life since middle school, perhaps you can choose a less public domain? Or one that doesn’t overwhelm my personal newsfeed every time I log on? I love you lots, but I don’t really need to know about Choir Katie’s boyfriend or where she’s spending her summer. Kthanxbai.

Grrrr.

What Internet happenings have been getting your panties in a bunch lately?

I’ll be there for you...unless you make this stupid movie

Penis Enlargements! for a month

Heidi Montag sings about getting wasted and boinking randoms

Who is going to read this?  Seriously.

Kate Beckinsale gets randomly randy…in front of her kids

Get nude, and get paid

Christopher Hitchens gets waterboarded..for 30 seconds…and freaks

Will Smith just can’t play a convincing a**hole

How to give good email

Finally.  A realistic sex scene (complete with a towel and creepy grandma picture)

Salty slab of not quite bacon —

Mocking my every taste bud?

I take comfort in the fact that I can buy a spam musubi from any 7-Eleven in Honolulu. If I need a pick-me-up or just something to fill my tummy, I head to the local convenience store and purchase this Hawaiian staple for just $1.09.

Spam is good prepared in other foods too, like next to scrambled eggs for breakfast or in fried rice for dinner. It really is the other white meat — except it’s pink.

And there is a reason why we Hawaiians love spam to such a degree that we consume more of it than any other locale in the world. (Almost 5 million cans of Spam are purchased per year). As the major Pacific port during World War II, spam was brought to the islands by the boatload mainly because it didn’t require refrigeration and it provided protein and sustenance for military personnel. For nearly 60 years now, numerous spam dishes have been invented and several continue to be special local recipes.

To be honest, though, I am only partial to spam musubi, which is really just a warm sushi. If you’re brave enough, here is my personal recipe to try it for yourself.

SPAM MUSUBI

Makes 16

Ingredients:

3 cups uncooked short- or medium-grain rice

4 cups water

4 sheets of sushi nori (seaweed in big squares)

1 12-ounce can spam

1/4 cup soy sauce

1/4 cup sugar

Water

Instructions:

1. Prepare rice.

2. Cut nori into quarters.

3. Cut spam into 16 thin, rectangular slices. In a large un-greased frying pan over medium heat, fry slices until brown and slightly crispy. Remove from heat.

4. In a small saucepan over high heat, add soy sauce and sugar; bring just to a boil, then remove from heat. Add spam slices to mixture.

5. Place spam on top of ⅓ cup of cooked rice and wrap with seaweed.

Enjoy!

The next time we log in to Myspace, let’s just hit delete. January 30 is International Delete Your Myspace Account Day. The idea was started by Bloggasm’s Simon Owens, who realized life is too short to wait for excessive banner ads to load.

Do we really need to know when the kid who sits behind us in Chemistry class celebrates his birthday? Do we really enjoy all those crappy Kelly Clarkson songs blaring from random profiles? And let’s not even get into Top 8 drama. Think of the hours we could save by not stalking our secret crushes online. Maybe we’d have time to study for that French quiz after all.

Then there’s Myspace remorse. We can’t forget that it’s not just hot boys and our best friends who check out our profiles. Remember that bleary-eyed photo from last weekend’s party– the one with all those empty PBR cans? Think about mom seeing it. Or worse, a prospective employer could find it. According to this New York Times article, job recruiters are using Myspace and Facebook as alternative background checks. Let’s start cleaning up those profiles, ladies!

Or Better yet, let’s just say no to Myspace

~CHecK oUT mY FRee WeBcaM!~

No thanks, Fembot.

Online-dating sites, while fun and successful for those in the know, can be very daunting to your average, not-so-computer-savvy individual. Getting lost in the sea of PC-murdering spam and creepy come-hithers when looking for a date online is quite simple when you don’t have a clue what to do.

What gives, internet?

Bridging the gap between the informal, formal and humorous is WooMe, an intuitive way to meet people online in a more interactive fashion.

The premise is simple: WooMe throws users right into the deep-end first, meeting one person via webcam a minute – yes, a minute. A rapid-fire chat session with each person is done with keywords picked by the user; ask them about their likes and dislikes through their default subjects to see if you’re compatible with them. After five one-minute sessions you can choose to contact the user of your interest for a dollar – yes, a dollar.

WooMe is speed-dating at its finest – but it’s not limited to flash-in-the-pan romances, either. Users can utilize WooMe’s webcam system to meet friends, travel buddies and whatnot. Seeing that it’s a beta I would recommend using it now before all the slimeballs catch on, solicit minors, get involved in a scandal that plays out on national television and ruins the fun for us well-adjusted adventurous types.

As of today WooMe works only on Pacific Time. So if you’re on the east coast (or in any other time-zone for that matter) plan on reworking your schedule to give it a proper try.

At first, I was anti-facebook and refused to put a picture up and only opened an account so that I could see what all the broohaha was about. After a few months, I looked like the creepy one with only a question mark to represent me. So, I gave in and posted my first facebook picture.

In my mind, the aspect that made facebook legitimate at first was the fact that it ONLY for college students. Somehow that justified it to me and seemed to minimize the amount of creepy old men posing as fourteen-year-olds that could be on it.

But now, The New York Times reports that Facebook is heading towards a future more similar to that of Myspace, and that sucks.

“Some of the new features, demonstrated by software developers at a Facebook event, will allow members to recommend and listen to music, insert Amazon book reviews onto their pages, play games and join charity drives, all without leaving the site.

The result is expected to be a proliferation of new tools and activities for Facebook’s 24 million active users, who have largely been limited to making online connections, sharing photos and planning events.”

Okay, cool, more features for us to use and play with while procrastinating real work. Sounds good, right?

Wellll, not so fast. With these new features comes consequences…”The move could foster some of the chaotic creativity that is more closely associated with MySpace, its larger competitor. It could also open the door to hazards like spam, and make Facebook’s identity less clear.”

Okay, not so cool, more spam and more like myspace. I definitely agree that Facebook is losing it’s identity as well. It used to be a college social networking site, and that was fabulous. But now, it is opening its doors to too much extra crap and going further from its original mission. Tear.

I say, bring back the old facebook! Here here!