College Candy

And we hate the thought of Speidi children.

Wanna win some sexy toys?

Just dance, Katie Holmes!

Irritating moves dudes make on Facebook.

Scary celebrity dolls.

The Britney comeback continues.

The E! Network is done with the Pratts.

Mmm. Smell like a brand new book.

Low alcohol wine. Good or bad idea?

Nick Lachey and Vanessa Minnillo are dunzo.

I’d rather die than move…

The most obnoxious karaoke songs of all time.

We have a newfound love and respect for Al Roker.

Guys look hotter with a little ink.

10 things your dad taught you about sex.

Sweat proof makeup for summer!

Palin’s people want Letterman fired?

Macho movie men in humiliating costumes.

Anyone else forget that it was Monday yesterday? I spent my day BBQing with friends (or eating whatever they BBQed while I sat on the couch watching tv) only to come home, turn on my TV and realize I was halfway through The Hills. I was devastated (”SPENCER IS SUPPOSED TO APOLOGIZE TONIGHT!!”), but then I realized that MTV was showing the episode 12 more times over the course of the evening.

When I finally did get to watch it, though, I was a little disappointed. I’ve said this before, but I know this show isn’t really real. I think anyone with half a brain and access to Us Weekly would know that. But I hate when MTV is careless with their editing, making it completely impossible for viewers to suspend their common sense and believe that this all might be real.

Case in point: Heidi gets engaged one night and asks Steph (presumably the next day) to invite Lauren. At the same time, Audrina and Lo have already received actual invitations. One might say, “Well, Lauren, that could have been shot months later.” Well, other people, I call bullsh*t, because then they pan back to Heidi and Lauren both talking to Steph about losing her job like it was only yesterday. I don’t know much about weddings (beyond the fact that I probably won’t have one until I’m 40), but I do know that it takes months to plan one and invitations do not just come out the next day.

But whatever. That’s not the point of this post. Read More »

Upon meeting Heidi’s dad on last night’s episode of The Hills, I expected a little more from MTV. For instance, I expected a scene out of some sort of Western movie where Mr. Montag walks through swinging saloon doors, gives Spencer a look and then does some fancy moves with the gun in his holster as a tumbleweed blows by.

Instead I got some BS brunch at a Hollywood eatery where Spencer tripped over his words as he attempted to impress the Cowboy. Words that Heidi’s dad most definitely did not understand. So, Cowboy Montag, if you are reading this right now, I’d like to take this opportunity to translate that mumbo jumbo that came out of Pretty Boy Pratt’s mouth so maybe you can stop this wedding before it happens. Oh wait…. Well, at least you’ll know what he was talking about. Read More »

So, we all know who Carrie Prejean is.
And I’m pretty sure we’re all sick of her.

But just in case you weren’t completely and utterly tired of Miss California (yes, she is still Miss CA) and her shenanigans, we came up with 5 new ideas for her to try to keep herself in the limelight for just a liiittle bit longer. If none of these work, perhaps bunking up with Spencer Pratt would help. We can’t seem to get rid of him no matter how hard we try.

1) Create her own line of Prejean Panties (bras not included). Evidently, Prejean think bras, or any tops, are overrated. At least, she likes posing without them. While Prejean said herself, “I am not perfect,” we imagine she will soon follow that up with, “But I can make your butt look that way!”

2) Start her own blingin’ jewelry line on QVC. She obviously doesn’t have enough shiny, glittery, oversized, tacky ice already. So why not start her own line? If she makes those hoops just a little bit longer, they may even cover her exposed chest! Read More »

Lord knows Jay Z isn’t going to like this…

Bethenny Frankel wants to do DWTS!

Why does anyone care if Adam Lambert is gay?

4 healthy foods that cost less than a dollar.

White House Correspondent Dinner red carpet fashion.

Get the best letters of recommendation!

After watching some weird 80’s flashback episode of Gossip Girl, I was hoping for something a little more…er… modern entertaining when it came to The Hills last night. And besides that weird sequins headband thingy that Steph wore (and that I also wore in 1994 to a dance recital) MTV came through for me once again.

Unlike last week’s episode where nothing really happened, there was a whole lot of action last night. And everyone was at work! This is only the 2nd time we’ve seen anyone working this season. The cast has been too busy jet-setting to get anything done and I really sorta forgot that people in L.A. even have jobs. I figured they just celebrated birthday parties, went clubbing and stayed in fancy resorts in Hawaii year round.

Anyways, people were working. And people, lots of people, were getting the boot. Read More »

Tonight was a pretty stellar night. First, I worked out next to a total hottie on the elliptical (but didn’t muster up the courage in my sweaty ‘beater to say anything), then I came home and watched an AMAZING episode of Gossip Girl while eating an ice cream sandwich, and then Spencer and Heidi went to therapy.

When I die, I hope heaven is this good.

A lot of little things happened on tonight’s episode of The Hills. There was the budding romance between Audrina and Brody, or, more likely, MTV trying to make it seem like some big thing that will ultimately end with nothing ever happening. There was Stephanie being a giant moron at People’s Revolution where we learn she can’t answer phones and she doodles when people yell at her (probably because she can’t turn to coke and heroin anymore).

But those were only an appetizer to the delicious drama that was served up next. Read More »

Spencer Pratt tries to out Tweet Ashton Kutcher.

Turn your bed into a bong!

So, who’s at Coachella?

How to bribe a bouncer.

Degree does perfume.

Is that…Lady Gaga?