We’re back with another edition of G.W.W.E. (Guys We Wanna Eff)!

Ladies, do you like a good nibble during a makeout sesh? Do you get off on the idea of escaping from the perils of public life into seclusion with your hunk? Do you get hot for precariously messy coifs? If you said ‘yes!’ to all of these questions, and can stand the sight of blood without fainting, Robert Pattinson may be the boy-toy for you.

At 23, Pattinson has set the world ablaze with his vacant, erotic stare that communicates the only emotion I ever need to know: ‘I want to eff the sh*t out of you.’ The hottie shot to fame last fall  for his film role as bloodsucking, sexy vampire Eddie Cullen in the Twilight series. Ever since, ladies aged 8 to 88 have been fainting in the streets at the mere sight of the British hunk, who has been known to instigate spontaneous orgasm with a single scowl.

Most recently, Robert has been making headlines in New York for the legions of girls who’ve come out to stalk him catch a glimpse as he films his new movie, Remember Me, in the Big Apple. Just last week, the effable villain was clipped by a New York taxi cab as he tried to escape the hordes of tween girls throwing themselves upon him in lust. But breathe easy ladies, he’s fine (or shall I say, he’s foyne!).

So, RP, I confess: your devilish grin has inspired me to return to my TigerBeat roots and pin up your photos all over my walls. And refrigerator. And, well, the inside of my medicine cabinet. No facade in my home has been spared from your infinitely effable visage. When you’ve decided you’ve had enough of the tween fandom and want a real woman, come scowl in my direction.

• A pair of married strippers are the latest predators to get busted on myspace.

• Scarlett Johannson ‘Waits’ till May to release new cover album.

• Be Afraid. Be Very Afraid. Tom Cruise talks about his beliefs.

• Coachella is going East Coast.

• How to land a guy in 30 days.

• Everyone hates Jessica Simpson.

• Natalie Portman loves cruelty-free shoes.

As predicted, since yesterday’s blog about Allison Stokke, it’s evident that her unwanted Internet popularity won’t be diminishing anytime soon.

We already know that she’s a gorgeous soon-to-be high school graduate with an amazing athletic talent. And we also know that she really wishes all of this attention – the Myspace pages, the newspaper articles, the blog comments – everything that is now surrounding her, would just go away.

What we didn’t know was that the men in Allison’s life are also being affected by her sudden stardom. And since it looks like her wish to go back to being just a normal teenager isn’t gonna come true (especially with bloggers like me on the loose) let’s discuss this matter.

Being that Allison Stokke’s father, Allan Stokke, just happens to be a pretty well-known criminal defense attorney, he’s having an especially hard time with this, because he obviously wants to track down and crush every single guy who says something sexual about his daughter. Even though he hasn’t brought anyone down in the face of justice, that isn’t stopping him from scouring the Internet blogs and message boards every day, in an attempt to filter out actual and potential stalkers.

He said, “I’m probably more sensitive to these things because of the cases I’ve seen over the years,” he said. “I’m concerned that something negative could develop from it.”

Allan will undoubtedly do everything in his power to make sure nothing from the blogging world enters into his family’s reality, and that these douchebags stay as far away from Allison as possible.

Speaking of douchebags, there seems to be one in particular who is actually allowed near Allison. Many pictures have surfaced of Allison and a guy who appears to be her lucky boyfriend. Well, lucky because he gets to date her, but unlucky since he is now the butt of many cyber-world jokes and, of course, these jealous blogger fans have decided that he is in fact a douchebag, and Allison must be rid of him immediately.

The Douchebag is certainly not a rare breed of male, as we have all come into contact with douchebags in some form or another. Whether he has unsuccessfully hit on you or your friend, or you’ve dated one, or you’ve watched one at a nightclub from afar because you dare not get too close to him and his “grinding” moves, a douchebag is typically a guy who makes it obvious right off the bat that he tries way too hard to be trendy, say the right things, hang out with the cool kids and yet, he normally ends up being “that guy” who you just make fun of to your friends anyway. Wearing sunglasses at night or globbing more product into his hair than a woman would ever dream of, a douchebag lacks an heir of natural confidence and comes off looking….goofy.

So, is Allison Stokke’s boyfriend a douchebag? Bastardly.com lets you decide for yourself, with six pages of Allison and her very lucky and unlucky mystery man.

For more pictures of hot chicks with douchebags, check out a very helpful website called (surprise, surprise) Hotchickswithdouchebags.com. Don’t let this happen to you.

Allison Stokke