I am three finals away from freedom. (At least that’s what my Facebook says.)

After months and months of bemoaning and belaboring senior year, the fall semester is almost complete. Half of my senior year is over. My lasts semester taking a full course load is over.  It’s the end of an era, the beginning of something new. It’s what I’ve been counting down to since October. I’ve spent more time than I’d like to admit ranting about how I could  not wait until the semester was over, how I needed a break, how I was tired of my professors, how I needed more free time and fewer responsibilities and how I was absolutely certain that this semester was just never going to end.

But now, now it’s very close to ending, and what I hadn’t seemed to realize was that it wasn’t so much my last fall semester of college that I wanted to end, but rather all of the work that accompanied it.

You see, I tried my best to strike a balance. But somewhere along the way the stress of senior year started overwhelming the sentimentality of senior year. It was less about enjoying the experience and more about powering through to the end of the experience. The senioritis started kicking in, and I started freaking out. I was trapped in a of must-get-things-done-now mind frame, worrying about my senior thesis (I don’t know why. It’s not due to April), my grad school applications (Don’t even know if I want to go to graduate school), and my grades (Still important. But now that the papers are done it doesn’t really seem as stress worthy). I spent a good chunk of the semester thinking about what comes next, and while it made sense at the time, that is not how I want to spend the latter half of my senior year. Read More »

I love the first week back after Thanksgiving break.

No scratch that, I hate it, actually. But what I do like is what that week represents. It’s the beginning of the end. The start of the finish. You’re over the hump. The semester is almost over. You’ve finally reached those last few dreadful weeks. And okay, maybe that doesn’t seem like something to be happy about, maybe you want to pull your hair out right now? Maybe you’re stressed? Sure, but just think, in a couple of weeks it will all be over.

How can you be sure that there’s a light at the end of the tunnel? Here are just a few signs that the semester is almost over.

10. You’ll do anything to avoid your homework. Okay. Time to get serious. You have a lot to get done these less few weeks. Time to buckle down and start working. No distractions. No Facebook. No phones. Reading time. But wait…you have been meaning to reorganize your desk. And your bookshelf. And…you get the idea.

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This has just been one of those weeks, the kind where I just feel like I am so exhausted that I could pass out at any moment. I had this huge paper due for my honors class, and we have to do the budget for next year for Allocations committee, and my little sister is coming to visit and yadda yadda yadda… It doesn’t even matter, you all know how those weeks go.

Well, when a week is already stressful enough, you know the last thing anyone needs is boy drama complicating things even more. And after hanging out with my ex last week, he’s clearly been messing with my head. As much as a part of me would love to banish him completely out of my life, I don’t know how soon that will happen. (And to the ladies who commented last week, thanks so much for the support, it’s really nice to know I’m not the only one! If I ever figure anything out, I will let you know immediately!) Instead, I spend my time thinking about him, about me, about what I want, about how annoyed I am that this is what I’m thinking about.

So yeah, I needed a little release. A night to just forget about everything that was on my overflowing plate (of unappetizing things) and just have fun. And I did that last Saturday night. And I might have had a few too many drinks. When me and my girls came back to campus, my drunk self really had to pee. Conveniently enough, the train stop was right next to that older boy’s house (you know, the one who took forever to ask me out). Since he’d been texting me all night already, I just (drunk) dialed him to let me use his bathroom. Read More »

“Is it supposed to be this hard?” I whined to my mom in an email on Tuesday night. I remember in years gone by that seniors generally didn’t seem like they were having problems until the second semester, when the crunch really hits. But sure enough, Tuesday afternoon saw me sitting on the floor, looking despondently at the mess in my room while scarfing down Lucky Charms like my life depended on it.

Taking 20 credits, working two jobs, and writing your thesis doesn’t leave for a whole lot of free time, and that’s a pretty hard thing to adjust to. I usually like to procrastinate – I work better with a gun to my head, it seems. But now I have to work in advance, because I don’t have time to do things the way I normally do.

This weekend, I don’t even have time to drink. What is my world coming to?

As for lessons learned these past two weeks or so, I realized the value of backing your sh*t up like your life depends on it. My thesis chapter was due on Monday. I didn’t finish it until Tuesday. Now, because I have an older version of OpenOffice (a free version of Microsoft Office, essentially), when my computer decided to spazz out, I lost 11 out of 12 pages.

Cue comfort food binging. Read More »