Every week, CC and John bring you some of the weirdest, funniest, and saddest things he hears on his college campus. And we know he’s not the only one who hears this stuff. Join the Overheard revolution! Leave your own overheard convos in the comments or send ‘em over!

(Girl, raising hand in class.)

Girl: Wait, so … some languages don’t have vowels? That’s IMPOSSIBLE! How are you supposed to pronounce them? Do you have to guess? I can’t believe that! That’s so stupid! *scribbles furiously in notebook*

(Professor, teaching a class.)

Prof: Heaven is hard to describe. I’ve seen plenty of evocative depictions of Hell, but I’ve never seen a truly compelling vision of Heaven.

Student, interrupting: May I suggest one?

Prof: No. I want to talk about something else.

(Two guys, getting into their car.)

Guy: You ever notice that every time we go to make candles, one of us cheats on his girlfriend? Read More »

Mandy Moore is married.

Obama wants to help students.

Chris Brown pulls out of Teen Choice Awards.

Lookin’ for a new look? How about 80’s eyes?

Shooting spree in Alabama kills 11.

Annalynne McCord drives as well as she acts.

Spring handbags!

Katie Holmes has lady hair!

Octomom coming to her senses?

5 argument tactics that never work.

Life changing beauty products.

[Every week, CC and John bring you some of the weirdest, funniest, saddest things he hears on his college campus. Join the Overheard revolution!

Leave your own overheard convos in the comments or send 'em over!.]

“So I was going to go to the package store, and then I thought, hey, you know what, Fruit by the Foot. That ever happen to you?”

“It’s been a hairy week. Pubic hair, mostly.”

“I’m furious! This is terrible! The whole place smells like… boys! I’m gonna have to make, like, 20 bags of popcorn to get the stink out!”

(A teacher.)

“I love all my students. They’re just the cutest little puppies. Now, my puppies, let’s talk about sex.”

“I’d go to church if they had, like, communion eclairs or something. Or communion steak.”

“Or communion free money.”

“… and I was like, oh, my God, my nephew is eight years old and he’s wearing a huge hat with a shark fin on it. He’s one of those kids.”

“We should get more interns. They’re like human-shaped trash disposals.” Read More »

If you’re a fan of scary movies, you may be hard pressed to choose your favorite. But oh. my. lord; the worst scary movies of all time have turned into jokey, pop culture icons.

The trailers of these films look promising, and then the movies crash and burn. Big time. And they become the laughingstock of twelve year old kids everywhere who thought they were being daring by watching that movie that mommy and daddy told them not to.

But, wait. That movie was a joke.

In the spirit of Halloween, my friends and I were recently trying to list the best scary movies of all time, but in doing so, we ended up creating a list of the 5 worst. It seems like those were easier to come up with because usually there’s no argument; they are unanimously bad. These movies don’t send chills down your spine or make you jump when someone comes up behind you. These not-so-scary movies make you laugh. Hard.

In no particular order: Read More »

Happy Sweetest Day, ladies. Time to snuggle up with that sweet person in your life and tell one another how much you lurve eachother with some candy and flowers. Or, for those single ladies out there, time to snuggle up with a little cookie dough before hitting the mall to show yourself a little sweetness.

Whatever you choose to do today, here are a few sweets to celebrate with. Starting with the sweetest kiss.

Chuck Bass is the ultimate womanizer.

Looks like redheads are having all the fun.

Marcia Brady has tried anal sex??

10 things your student bag should never be missing.

Heidi Klum loves her milk.

Will Sarah Palin be on SNL tonight? Only time will tell.

How to settle your debt with the roomie.

What insult should be the new “douchebag“?

Do you volunteer your time for your favorite cause? Volunteer to work on the presidential campaign? Pass out pamphlets for women’s rights? Throw paint on people sporting fur coats?

I know I do some of those things. I am a huge supporter of animals’ rights, but even I think that PETA is a bit extreme when it comes to getting their point across. And it appears that some of their members are taking that extremism even further.

PETA intern, Jennifer Thornburg, Cutout Dissection.com convinced federal courts to change her name to support Cut Out Dissection Month in October.

Now, I don’t know if it’s fame, pure insanity, or a real dedication to the cause, but this girl is making a bold statement. This is originality and creativity at its finest. All in the “name” of community service!

So why did this 19 year old intern do this? She wanted to raise awareness about the six million animals that are killed for dissection each year. The animals suffer painful deaths. She hopes to raise awareness amongst students and teachers to say no to dissection, and yes to alternative ways of anatomy.

Around PETA and to her fellow interns, she is known as simply Cut Out, but her parents still call her Jenny. She loves introducing herself as Cutout Dissection.com because it engages people in conversation about dissection efforts, thus leading to ways they can get involved and help the cause.

Although, I can’t help but wonder what strangers think when she introduces herself at the bar:

“Hey, pretty lady. I’m Jon.”

“Hi Jon. I’m Cutout Dissection.com.”

“What?”

Tell me what do you think: is this amazing dedication or just plain crazy?

So, apparently the Wall Street crisis is hurting people in more ways than we thought. We’ve discovered yet another desperate person trying to sell sex to pay off debt.

Remember that crazy, desperate college grad student from Sacramento who tried to sell her virginity to pay for her student loans (I guess working and saving is just not as profitable)?

Well, looks like she inspired someone because after Johnny No Name blew away the severance pay he was offered when he was let go from his investment banking firm position, he decided to move on to selling his gay virginity online — because whoring yourself out is the must have job of the year.

What is gay virginity, anyway? According to him, it’s a hand job and/or blow job, but absolutely no anal (at least not part of this specific deal), because he’s not gay. Sure, keep telling yourself that.

The real comedy comes when he swears to the bidders he is “HOT” and looks like Adam Brody. Well Johnny, if you’re so “HOT,” maybe you should try to model your way out of debt instead of selling a hand and blow job.

…Just a suggestion.

It may or may not shock you, but where there is one desperate person there is of course a few more; currently Johnny No Name has a high bid of $11,000.

You gotta loves those brothels in Nevada and Rhode Island, thanks to them this is all perfectly legal. I wonder if Mr. No Name’s plane ticket from New York to Nevada is included in the bid?

This is just another piece of evidence that shows how far people will go for money and sex. Would you sell your body to pay off thousands of dollars of student loans?

Ok, maybe not good, but according to a study by Beckley Foundation’s Global Cannabis Commission (I know! How do I get a job there?!), weed isn’t nearly as dangerous as all those Boones Farms you’ve been chugging.

“Historically there have only been two deaths worldwide attributed to cannabis, whereas alcohol and tobacco together are responsible for an estimated 150,000 deaths per annum in the UK alone.”

In fact, the only thing that makes pot a dangerous drug stems (haha, stems) from the fact that it isn’t legal: the crime that surrounds it, all that crazy sh*t people are lacing it with these days, etc. By making pot legal, people would be able to regulate it and keep it safe.

Not to mention stimulate the economy and create more jobs: people to grow it, people to sell it, people to regulate it, people to supply all the stoned kids with enough Cheez Its and Twinkies to get through the day…

Seriously, marijuana could keep this country from a depression! (And if it doesn’t, it could make the depression more bearable…or hilarious!)

Down with that dangerous alcohol!

Bring on the cannabis!

[Every week, CC and John will bring you some of the wierdest, funniest, saddest things he hears on his college campus.  Join the Overheard revolution!  Leave your own overheard convos in the comments.]

“Is that your phone?”

“Yeah.”

“You have a pink phone?”

“Mmhm.”

“Is it, like, your girlfriend’s phone?”"

“Nope.”

“Seriously?”

“Yup.”

Found in a dining hall, on a piece of paper shoved into a napkin dispenser:

“Students! Rise up! Class riot today, 3:00 in the courtyard. Refreshments will be served.”

Two in the morning – a pair of legs is poking out of a broken window. Two guys in striped hipster hoodies are standing nearby, craning their necks to look in.

“No, no,” say the legs. “This isn’t going to work. I’ll still be locked out, I’ll just be locked out inside.”

Ten or so sweaty people in t-shirts and tank tops are clustered around a cooler. One guy lifts the top off the cooler and dumps some colored powder in.

“What was that?” asks one, confused.

“Nothing,” says the dumper. “Just drink the Kool-aid.”

There’s a commotion outside, in the hallway. I poke my head out. A man is sprinting down the hallway with his sweater unzipped, a rhinestone necklace bouncing on his exposed chest hair, and his mouth wrapped tightly around a beer bottle. Read More »

I used to joke that I could measure the amount of fun I had at a party by how many bruises I woke up with the next day. I’m not trying to sound sadistic, but I bruise easily and am incredibly clumsy; I party hard, and I fall even harder. I haven’t even been too out of control in the past few weeks, yet my legs are still littered with black and blue marks that seem to have appeared out of nowhere.

I’ve seen a lot of drunken injuries in my day. Some are funny; some not so much. You really shouldn’t need to wear hard hats or protective armor to a party, so here’s a brief list of some potentially painful injuries, and how to avoid them.

Injury: Cigarette burns.

Avoid them by: Not drunkenly smoking your cigs all the way through the band; not giving someone with a lit cigarette your hand; not putting the wrong side of your lit cigarette into your mouth.

Injury: First, second, or third degree burns.

Avoid them by: Being conscious of where the bonfire pit is at a keg party on a cool autumn night; not attempting to walk through said pit in an effort to reunite with your friends after peeing in the woods.

Injury: Stitches on your scalp.

Avoid them by: Not jumping up and down on your lofted bed and cracking your head open on the ceiling; not falling out of a lofted bed after sloppy, drunken, sex, and cracking your head open on your f*ck buddy’s desk.

Injury: A shiner the color of an eggplant.

Avoid it by: Not chugging straight Bacardi and proceeding to faceplant your nightstand. These actions may or may not also have a negative effect on the nightstand, which may or may not break apart from the impact of your face. Read More »