What the hell is a 1099?!

Last week was a pretty big week for me in grown-up world. Not only did I learn a valuable lesson about why you don’t take your shoes off in bars, but I also filed out my taxes all by myself. And by all by myself, I mean with the help of an accountant who probably now thinks that my IQ borders somewhere in the high twenties.

Up until last week I thought filing taxes was as simple as creating a fake Facebook profile to stalk exes (okay…one-night stands). I fill out a slip of paper with my name, social security number, yearly earnings, bra size, favorite movies, and my vote on what color M&Ms should include next. Bada bing,  bada boom, I’m a functioning member of society.

But no. This process makes writing a 19 page paper on the causes and effects of “I only smoke when I’m drunk” look incredibly easy. First I had to fill out a million pieces of paper, then I had to track down W2′s, W4′s, 1099s, 13 Chinese take-out menus, and Colt 45s. And it’s not like I stored them all in one place.  Why would I ever do anything that would make my life less of a daily episode of Real World/Road Rules Challenge. Some were at home in Florida, some were at my grandmother’s NYC apt., some were buried 6 feet under cement in a “what? We’re making a graduation time capsule and I can choose one thing to put in? Okay, here’s some official, legal, looking documents that I doubt I’ll ever need” time capsule on the Syracuse campus. Read More »

Let's all take a moment of silence for Snookie's skin tone.

As you may or may not know, there’s a lot going down in Washington right now in regards to our health and bodies. Not only is there major debate about Obama’s health care plan, but Capitol Hill has been buzzin’ about Botox. Namely, the idea to put a tax (nicknamed “Bo-tax”) on it and other cosmetic surgeries.

That has since been vetoed (probably after all 4 casts of The Real Housewives/Joan Rivers threatened a sit-in at the White House) in favor of a new idea: adding a 10% tax to indoor tanning.

The main idea behind the new plan is for the government to make it more difficult for you to feed your potentially cancerous addictions (much like cigarettes) by doing what the government does best: taxing.

Needless to say, orange people nationwide are up in (leathery) arms! Read More »

Overall, this is sad, but in a couple of weeks I’ll be getting nearly a G in tax returns.  Yeah, that’s a crapload of money.  But when I look back at all the hours I worked in 2008, it also makes me realize… I made jack sh*t.  Still, this hefty lump sum couldn’t come at a better time for me, as I’m watching my credit card debt grow, next month’s rent is looming on the horizon, and summer (aka a full-time waitressing gig) can’t come quick enough.

In reality, I’d love to take my refund check and spend it in one go at the mall, especially since warm weather means I have to chuck my so-worn-they-belong-in-the-What-Not-to-Wear-dumpster sweater boots, and I don’t have ANY cute flip flops to wear in their place.  But, since I’ve been struggling all winter, I am going to use this money wisely.  And by use “wisely,” I don’t necessarily mean put it back into the bank.  We all deserve to splurge every now and then, and here are some of the best guilty pleasures your tax refund can buy.

1.  Upgrade your phone.

Am I the only campus coed who has never known the joys of an iPhone or Blackberry?  I recently lost my cell in a drunken stupor, and, though I had been waiting for the summer to upgrade, I figured it’s now or never.  Best buy of my life.  I got a refurbished 16-gig iPhone for under $250.  And it’s not just a phone– I can check the weather without getting out of bed or waiting for Weather.com to load on my slow-ass computer, I can check my email for last minute class cancellations while on my way to a lecture, and once I figure out these apps, I’m pretty sure I can load a calorie counter onto my phone to use in the dining hall.  How did I live without this baby? Read More »

We at CollegeCandy.com are firm believers that every woman needs a vibrator.
Here’s why:

1. You learn your body, what you like and what you don’t like.
2. Masturbation is good for your health.
3. Everyone needs a little stress release at the end of (or during) a long day.
4. A vibrator won’t get you preggers when you feel the sudden need for a Big O.
5. They feel good. Really good.

Convinced? Great, because Babeland is giving everyone a chance to nab a vibrator tax-free today! We get taxed for everything from our books to our clothes, and those sex fiends over at Babeland don’t think we should get taxed on our orgasms.

Hop on over to their website and choose your new BFF from their giant supply. Is the pure wand the toy for you? Or are you more of a Gigi kinda gal?

Maybe you’re both!
Stock up now before the day is over and your self-induced orgasms are taxed once more. We know we will definitely be adding this to our  Tax Refund Shopping List…

Ok, so April 15th (Tax Day) isn’t everyone’s favorite day, but it is for those of us with a refund coming. Hollaaaa.

Personally, I have some big money coming my way. At first I was just planning on making it rain, but then I realized that spring is coming and there are lots of magnificent things out there that I can spend this new dinero on. Below are just a few of the things I’m drooling over right now.

Shop on, Tax Refundees. And if you’ve got your eye on a must-have Tax Refund splurge, share it in the comments. We’ve got money to burn, baby!

Chuck Bass is getting fat.

Mischa Barton claws her way back to fame.

A guide to makeup brushes.

Get a freaking room, Speidi!

Need to file taxes?

Sad ending for Angels pitcher.

The candidates went out with grace in last night’s final presidential debate. McCain pulled himself together after his meandering, unsure performance last week and Obama kept his cool. Meanwhile, Joe the Plumber lost none of his usual candor and confidence in his first appearance in front of a national TV audience. There ya go, Joe, doggonit! I mean, wait. Who’s Joe?

Joe the Plumber (possibly related to Joe Six-Pack) left the debate looking good – or at least looking important. Whoever this guy is, the candidates sure care a lot about him.

Joe began to take the stage when the debate turned to finicky economic issues – in other words, are these cranky, vote-grubbing politicians actually going to do anything for us, the average American citizen who plans on buying their own business?

Obama’s run-in with Joe bit him in the butt when McCain called him out on his tax proposals; previously, whenever McCain or Palin tried to bust the Democratic candidates on taxes, they had a strong parry: “95% of Americans won’t see a dollar of raised taxes.” Joe the Plumber gave McCain some ammo – here, some dude who just wants to pursue the American dream will, in fact, be affected by the Obama tax plan. Read More »

Whether she was talking about this nation’s plethora of hot guys, or everyone’s favorite group of drinks, at 9:10PM this evening, Sarah Palin inadvertently gave CC a new descriptive phrase to throw around the office at every possible moment.

We knew something good would come out of tonight’s debate.

I never have dealt well with “going” to work or “answering” to a boss. I know it sounds rather hopeless, but I have an entrepreneur-esque mind and I set out to never “go” to work or “answer” to anyone I didn’t want to answer to. And so far, I’ve achieved that goal.

I work 100% freelance. I make my own schedule. Some days I don’t work at all. I sleep in when I want to. I go out ’til 7 am if I want to. Hell, I take off to California if I want to. There are no rules, really, and many a friend have drooled their envy all over my face without taking a minute to really understand how NOT easy working for yourself can be. If you’re considering pursuing this lifestyle, but you’re not sure if it’s for you, maybe I can be of some help.

MOTIVATION

You’ve gotta be able to be self-motivated. You’ve got to make money and build your career REGARDLESS of the fact that there’s an X-Files marathon on channel 17. Read More »

With the infamous Iowa caucus and the first Primaries (in New Hampshire, if you haven’t been paying much attention) out of the way, the 2008 election is on. Not that it wasn’t really on before – I couldn’t open a web page or turn on the radio without hearing something about Obama, Hillary or Huckabee – but we have officially entered a new phase. And things are about to get serious.

Welcome to Primary Season, the time when we get out and vote for the candidate we want representing our party in the run for the Oval Office. This might seem completely boring/unimportant- ”who the hell is this Barack Obama character, anyway” to you, but it is quite the opposite.

There are currently a slew of Democratic and Republican candidates traipsing across the country in attempts to become our next President. Only one of each will have the opportunity to go for the gold. And only one will actually take it.

And, might I remind you, the man or woman who finally moves into the White House in 2008 is completely up to us. Yes, even you.

I know that discussing politics is not the top priority of many college students. What with more important topics like class, partying and reality TV, who even has the time? But it should be; especially now. Read More »