We’re back with another edition of G.W.W.E. (Guys We Wanna Eff)!

Ladies, do you like a good nibble during a makeout sesh? Do you get off on the idea of escaping from the perils of public life into seclusion with your hunk? Do you get hot for precariously messy coifs? If you said ‘yes!’ to all of these questions, and can stand the sight of blood without fainting, Robert Pattinson may be the boy-toy for you.

At 23, Pattinson has set the world ablaze with his vacant, erotic stare that communicates the only emotion I ever need to know: ‘I want to eff the sh*t out of you.’ The hottie shot to fame last fall  for his film role as bloodsucking, sexy vampire Eddie Cullen in the Twilight series. Ever since, ladies aged 8 to 88 have been fainting in the streets at the mere sight of the British hunk, who has been known to instigate spontaneous orgasm with a single scowl.

Most recently, Robert has been making headlines in New York for the legions of girls who’ve come out to stalk him catch a glimpse as he films his new movie, Remember Me, in the Big Apple. Just last week, the effable villain was clipped by a New York taxi cab as he tried to escape the hordes of tween girls throwing themselves upon him in lust. But breathe easy ladies, he’s fine (or shall I say, he’s foyne!).

So, RP, I confess: your devilish grin has inspired me to return to my TigerBeat roots and pin up your photos all over my walls. And refrigerator. And, well, the inside of my medicine cabinet. No facade in my home has been spared from your infinitely effable visage. When you’ve decided you’ve had enough of the tween fandom and want a real woman, come scowl in my direction.

[I’ll be the first to admit that I’m not the epitome of prim and proper- heck, who really is nowadays? But looking around at the misguided youths of today *ahem drinking buddies*, I’m starting to think that Miss Manners might have been onto something.

While you may never need to know how to greet a duke or how to tell which fork is REALLY the oyster fork, knowing how to deal with people whom owe you money, how much to tip, and how to address the ever annoying licorice-in-teeth conundrum without being rude might actually come in handy in the real world. I'm not trying to be your mother - oh goodness, no - I'm just here to help you out of those little etiquette dilemmas. So here goes: a quick lesson in etiquette. The sh*t you might actually need to know.]

I know that times are tough. The economy is in the dumper and our wallets are just getting emptier and emptier. These days it seems like I can’t turn a corner or walk into a bar without having to pay somebody something. Though I know it’s hard to choose between blowing your last dollars on another pitcher of beer or tipping the bartender, as a one-time waitress, I would never ever suggest skimping on tips. These service providers work hard (usually on a tiny salaries) and their paychecks rely heavily on your tips.

The other day, I was appalled when after ordering a heap-load of Chinese food, a “friend” of mine flicked the delivery guy a quarter and closed the door. A quarter. As in twenty-five cents. I literally had to chase down the guy and shove a few dollars at him. When I confronted her, she said she wasn’t sure how much to tip. I called bullsh*t, but it got me wondering if this is a real problem for a lot of people. So in case you were wondering, here is a tipping cheat sheet on who to tip and how much to tip them.

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