More details emerge from the Wesleyan shooting.

The Gossip Girls get record deals.

Advice from college seniors.

Rihanna’s Dubai tour cancelled.

My Little Pony…the movie?

Move over Guitar Hero – DJ Hero is coming.

Lego-Bama Inauguration.

Dick Cheney can’t handle moving boxes.

Jack Black speaks for Obama? Random…

5 things to watch for during the Inauguration.

Tips for getting a better badonk.

So, it is possible for Angelina to look bad…

Get to know Taylor Momson.

Ryan Phillipe shops Ikea, too!

6 cheap ways to boost your style.

Ever had an intense desire to have a heart attack? Someone heard your prayers.

Britney forced to change her naughty song title.

The best most disturbing version of Beyonce’s Single Ladies yet.

Hugh Jackman: the real Joe Six Pack?

Taylor Momson is not rexy, she’s just skinny!

Americans have terrible taste in movies.

Sarah Palin confirmed an SNL visit. Watch out, Tina.

McCain is gets a second chance on Letterman.

Cosmo’s hottest men on earth. (Editor’s Note: WHERE IS PIVEN?!)

5 things men buy to overcompensate make us think they are too cool for school.

Where in the world are the Jolie Pitts?

Gossip Girl heads to college.

Pumpkin Picking: the ultimate (celebrity) fall activity.

Paris Hilton lookin’ really good. (I know, I can’t believe it either!)

Mark Wahlberg hates SNL.

Tampons to go!

Shocker: Froot Loops is not good for you!

This week was a doozy. We found out that John Edwards is an evil man-whore, pedophilia is totally fine as long as you are talking about a celebrity, and, contrary to popular belief, shopping actually makes women cry.

But not many people seemed to notice all that with the Olympics goin’ on.

It is hard to pay attention to anything when Michael Phelps is all over the news, breaking world records and being all around sexy. He even sorta makes me forget all about the darker side of the games. Drinking doesn’t hurt, either.

All this Olympic watching, though, has totally sucked up our back-to-school packing time. It is impossible to concentrate on that To Do List when all these gorgeous men are popping up on our TVs. There is just so much to do and remember before we get back to the dorms. Ugh; we can only imagine what incoming freshmen are dealing with. (Even worse…we wish we were incoming freshmen again.)

What we wouldn’t give to have those random hookups again. To hunt for men in class. To flirt with unsuspecting males for free drinks. To spend all day watching bad TV. To get cheap birth control from the University Health Service.

Ah. Must. Snap. Out. Of. It.

Well, since it’s the weekend, we can at least hit the town like we are still freshmen (only with better ID’s)…