Proposition 8 was overturned, and now we have to see that lesbian comedienne Ellen Degeneres as the new face of JCPenney? Where on EARTH will I shop now? Ladies, we’ve got to do something about this. Let’s protest that crazy talk show host so that her homosexuality doesn’t taint all our kids’ back-to-school clothes and our Christmas shopping.

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Surprise, surprise: Thursday’s season five premiere of Jersey Shore collected a million viewers less than the first episode of last season, when the cast was in Italy. Some people argue that they’re sick of watching these same eight people, I argue that there’s too many extraneous characters to keep track of, especially if you’ve just tuned in…seriously, everyone looks incredibly similar!

Don’t worry, this will clear everything up. Meet all the extra people that keep stealing the airtime away from Sammi Sweetheart, The Situation, Snooki and the rest of the original cast. Once viewers are all up to speed, these guidettes and gorillas will remain on the air as long as the Kardashians do!

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The days after Christmas that lead up to New Year’s are some of the most exciting fun-filled dreadful days for a single girl (let’s be honest). New Year’s is swiftly approaching and I find it particularly irksome that so much importance is spent on a holiday that is really only fun for the few of us that are over 21 and in a relationship (I belong in neither group). New Year’s usually amounts to a toast of sparkling cider and a swift move to bed  after the year’s begun. But even if I am a Debbie Downer about this particular holiday, I am still a girl who deep, deep, deep, deep down somewhere in my heart enjoys the romanticism of the holiday.

Here’s a list of Top New Year’s Eve Kisses for the like-minded single girl. Read More »

I’ll admit it: I’m an addict. It’s a horrible habit that, after so many years, I just can’t kick. It’s available, it’s affordable and, hey, it makes me feel good about myself. And even though it’s probably damaging for me in the long run, I just can’t stop.

Yeah, I’m a consumer of the Kardashian culture. I watch the shows (the originals, the spin-offs and Dancing With The Stars when one is competing), I read the interviews, I follow the obnoxious tweets. And recently, people like Daniel Craig, Jonah Hill and Barbara Walters are calling me out on my fascination with the most overexposed and yet untalented people on television, the Kardashians. Read More »

It’s the most wonderful time of the year, when gorgeous models prance around in next to nothing on network television…yes, I’m talking about the Victoria Secret Annual Fashion Show! Instead of getting insecure and feeling badly about myself while watching abnormally beautiful people on CBS this upcoming Tuesday night, I’ve decided to embrace the female parade in a few ways. Read More »

One of the best parts of fall TV is the fall Halloween specials. Apparently almost every.single.show. on TV is going to be doing a Halloween episode this fall. Maybe there will even be a Hoarders where the woman’s house is filled with candy corn and pumpkin seeds. Just kidding, her house will probably be filled with dead animals (cliche hoarder).

If you want to get in the Halloween spirit with your favorite shows, check out this sneak peak of upcoming Halloween episodes.

Not even Carrie herself wants to go back!

Carrie Bradshaw is an icon. Her lifestyle is completely unattainable (you show me a columnist for a New York paper who has a closet full of Manolos, and I’ll shave my eyebrows). She’s the most fashionable woman in New York, and she’s not even real. Don’t tell me you have never looked at a wacky dress and thought, “That’s SO Carrie.”

She’s an aspiration. You know you’ll never have her closet or her men or her friends who always seem to always have time to grab lunch with her despite their real jobs. She’s pure fiction, but I still love her. And let me be clear, I know she’s self-centered. I know she only talks about herself when Miranda’s mom dies or when Charlotte learns that she can’t get pregnant, but her whole aura is still fabulous.

And now she’s going to be ruined.

The CW is as close to closing a deal to create The Carrie Diaries as Carrie was to marrying Aiden. The Carrie Diaries is Candace Bushnell’s prequel to Sex and the City and follows Carrie through her senior year of high school. Read More »

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Last fall, I raced back to my dorm every Wednesday night to join in the “Glee” weekly viewing party in my friend’s room. Although we would regularly hang out and watch television, and at least sit and later discuss our other favorite shows, we would all drop whatever we were doing (even if it was a 12-page paper due the next day) and set aside special time to get together to watch the sensation that is “Glee.”

Fox’s quirky musical actually released its pilot the summer before, and a bunch of my friends told me it was more than worth watching. The pilot was amazing, and definitely had me interested, but after watching a few episodes when the season started in the fall, I was hooked. “Glee” provides the fun of musicals with the brilliance of sitcoms that I thought had died amid the “reality TV” craze.

Seriously, have you seen what’s on television these days? I can feel my brain cells dying just knowing shows like these exist (start at the 11 second mark). Read More »

There are some things you learn in life (and in textbooks) that you never forget.

We went to the moon in 1969.
Plants live by converting sunlight into energy through the process of photosynthesis.
Cows have four stomachs.

All of those things are important to know if you want to pass that middle school test, but when it comes to the real stuff – the life lessons – textbooks don’t hold a candle to TV. Yes, I’m serious.

TV – even the crappiest of the crappy reality shows – has taught me some invaluable lessons about life and the world. Things you can’t get from a 2 hour Intro to Biology lecture or a 4-credit History of English course. Below are a few of the greatest lessons I’ve learned from my nights spent on the couch, chips and salsa in hand. Read More »