Whether you are making a Thanksgiving dinner with your friends at school or helping your parents with the big Turkey Day Dinner, don’t worry. I’ve got some easy recipes that are so delicious that your family and friends will gobble it up in a matter of minutes! You can sit back (in your elastic waistband pants) and just take alllll the credit for a delicious meal.

Main Course:

Stuffed Chicken Breast with Stuffing -This is a dish I made up on my own one day when I was craving stuffed chicken and let me tell you, it is delicious! It has all the goodness of a Thanksgiving meal wrapped up in one piece of stuffed chicken. Don’t believe me? Try it for yourself!

What you need:

• One package of boneless chicken breasts
• One package of Craisins dried cranberries
• One box of Stove Top turkey or chicken flavor stuffing
• Toothpicks
• McCormick Chicken Gravy packet

Directions:

1. Cook the stuffing according to boxed directions. Add Craisins and stir. Set aside.
2. Make the gravy package as directed by the package. Set aside.
3. Meanwhile, use a meat tenderizer to flatten the chicken breasts. Once flat, scoop one ice cream-scoop-sized spoonful onto the chicken breast. Use the spoon to flatten the stuffing across the breast. Then, start at the left side and roll the chicken, and secure with a toothpick.
4. Place chicken breasts in a glass or ceramic casserole dish. Top with Gravy mix.
5. Bake in oven at 350 degrees for about 25 minutes, or until chicken is cooked throughout.

Twice-Baked Sweet Potatoes with Marshmallow Topping -This is a side dish I’ve adapted from my infamous twice-baked potato recipe, which I usually make with white potatoes and top with cheddar cheese and bacon. But since it is fall, I’ve decided to take a new twist on this favorite dish!

What you need:

• Sweet potatoes (buy as many sweet potatoes as the number of people you are feeding)
• Butter
• Milk
• Ground cinnamon
• Crushed pecans
• Brown sugar
• Bag of mini-marshmallows

Directions:

1. Cook the sweet potatoes. You can either bake them in the oven or cheat like I do by nuking them in the microwave. If you do the microwave technique, poke holes in the sweet potato, cover with a paper towel, put in the microwave and cook until soft.
2. Once cooked, slice the sweet potatoes in half. Using a spoon, scoop out the inside of the potato and put into a large bowl. Set the potato “shell” to the side.
3. Using a handheld mixer, add butter and milk to the bowl of sweet potato filling. Add however much you need to get the consistency of mashed potatoes. Sprinkle in a dash of cinnamon to taste.
4. Meanwhile, combine 1/2 cup of brown sugar with the bag of chopped pecans.
5. Add the brown sugar combination to the sweet potato mixture.
6. Using a spoon, divvy up the sweet potato mixture among the sweet potato shells. Top with mini marshmallows.
7. Bake in over at 350 degrees until golden brown.

Bacon Pan-seared Brussel Sprouts - My stepmom made this dish for a regular dinner one night, but it was so delicious that it is worthy of being of Thanksgiving staple. Green vegetables are a great pair to sweet potatoes. And I should mention that the flavor in this dish is out of this world.

What you need:

• Bacon, ½ package
• 1 bag of frozen brussel sprouts

Directions:

1. Cook the bacon as directed by package. Cook until crunchy.
2. Meanwhile, defrost the brussel sprouts by boiling them in a pot of water.
3. Slice each brussel sprout in half, then dump them in the pan used to make the bacon, leaving the bacon grease in the pan. (The bacon grease gives it the flavor!)
4. Sear the brussel sprouts until browned.

Sweet Treats

Pumpkin Pie Pudding – My roommate introduced me to this recipe earlier this month, when she made a big batch of it for us. With this pudding comes all the best flavors you know and love from a traditional pumpkin pie, only this recipe takes hardly any time and you don’t have to worry about burning it! This recipe is simple and cheap to make.

What you need:

• 1 box of vanilla instant pudding
• 1 can of Libby’s pumpkin puree
• Mini graham cracker pie shells
• 1 can evaporated milk
• Cinnamon
• Brown sugar

Directions:

1. Make the pudding as the box states. Instead of using regular milk, use evaporated milk.
2. Add some brown sugar and cinnamon to taste.
3. If you are looking for extra points to wow them, present each serving in a mini graham cracker pie shell, and top with whipped cream and a dash of nutmeg!

Acorn Cookies -I forget where I came across this recipe, so I am sorry I cannot give the source the credit due, because these are adorable! These little treats resemble acorns, perfect for the fall season.

What you need:

• Bag of mini chocolate chips
• Mini round Nutter Butter cookie sandwiches
• Bag of Hershey’s Kisses

Directions:

1. Melt ½ of the chocolate chips in the microwave, stirring every few seconds.
2. Dip the flat end of the Kiss into melted chocolate and place a Nutter Butter on top.
3. Dip a mini chocolate chip in the melted chocolate and stick it on top of the cookie to resemble the stem.
4. Set aside to dry.

I hope you enjoy these recipes that have become favorites in my family. Happy Thanksgiving!

Thanksgiving brings together three of my favorite things

Here’s a guide to help you navigate spending time family time – with a family that’s not yours.

First things first, always bring a hostess gift. No, I’m not saying you have to spend big bucks on buying the hostess a new pair of diamond earrings, but something thoughtful is a must. Hostess gifts are the best way to say “thanks for letting me crash at your place, eat your food, and be comfy all weekend – instead of spending time cold, alone, and hungry in my dorm,” but with more class. A nice candle or a bottle of nice(r) wine is always a safe choice, but being a little bit creative can go a long way. Try places like Williams Sonoma or HomeGoods for cute, original ideas.

Every host(ess) is different. Some people insist on making sure you’re the most comfortable you can be, while others literally mean “make yourself at home.” Going with the flow is key. Where your comfort level lies and where their hosting abilities lie may have a bit of a variance, but make sure that you have a concession. And no matter how comfortable you feel, watch what you say. It is their household after all.

Helping out in the kitchen? Make sure that what you’re doing really is help. Many cooks like to have their space when it comes to food prep, especially considering Thanksgiving may be one of the biggest meals of the year to prepare. Busy yourself with a task that you know you’re good at, whether it’s washing dishes, chopping onions, or setting the table; even doing the tiniest chores can be a big help. However, if your help is flat-out rejected, don’t push, be helpful elsewhere.

Remember that every family is different. They all have different values, different traditions and different family compositions. Be open-minded and embrace their way of celebrating! And leave the judgment at home. Remember, every family has that crazy aunt or the grandfather who says inappropriate things. Even Especially on the holiday.

The Dos And Don’ts Of Thanksgiving Break: Brittany teaches us how not to make Thanksgiving weekend as regrettable as that one night freshman year when you decided Patron shots were a good idea. Comment on your favorite part of Thanksgiving and WIN A BIG PRIZE!

Your Thanksgiving Break Packing List: Don’t forget your fat pants (most people do.) And your bar outfit for Wednesday. Really, it’s soooo important for your high school social standing to pack right.

5 Things To Know About Being Home For Thanksgiving Break: College life is great, but there are some really amazing things about being at home again.  Here are some of the best.

Thanksgiving Dinner Will Wreak Havoc On Your Waistline: Kind of a buzzkill, but really valuable information.  No one wants to go back to school with an extra five covering up the Freshman 15.

Intro To Cooking: Cranberry Applesauce: A sophisticated take on your favorite baby food. You’ll wow your grandmother with this simple,easy recipe.

The Black Friday Go-To Outfit: Turn the mall into a runway with this fierce yet functional ensemble. Oh, we forgot to mention in the post you should probably bring protective eyewear.

College, I Thank Thee: It’s easy to forget during finals week, but college life is pretty fan-tastic – so let’s give thanks. Where else can  you walk of shame like it’s no big deal.

I’m Not Thankful For Thanksgiving: There are people who don’t love the holiday? Who knew?!

Life After College – Holiday Anxieties: There’s a reason suicide rates spike during the holidays. LOL. But seriously.

The Perfect (And Strechy) Outfits For Your Thanksgiving Dinner: No need to unbutton your jeans at the table this year.

Vegetarian Thanksgiving? Yes, Please: Tofurkey, anyone?

Green Up Your Turkey Day: So that next year you can be thankful for the ozone layer.

Thanksgiving Part Deux: Best ways to liven leftovers.  Ever.

The Weekly Ten: The Little Things I’m Thankful For: It’s the little, simple things in life that we need to be thankful for this Thanksgiving.  For me, it could be simple as a clear, quiet street for me to walk on Sunday morning back to my dorm in my Jessica Simpson pumps.

Packing Light: A Few Basics To Get You Through Thanksgiving Break: How to pack lightly this Thanksgiving Break, because who knows what size maternity pants you’re going to need to pack on your way back to college…

Morning After: Mommy Has a Thanksgiving Message: Ok, we get it – the day before giving thanks is the biggest party day of the year.  Thanks be to ‘not seeing my Mom on the walk of shame that morning.’

Intro to Cooking: Thanksgiving at College!: If you’re too far from home this Thanksgiving and you’re sticking to off-campus-housing living, don’t fret!  There is hope in a world where you can create your own Thanksgiving Feast. Bon Appetite!”

Ten Things to NOT Bring Up at Thanksgiving Dinner: Ok, your life aint’ a Glee episode.  It’s not going to cut to the next scene after you say something like this.

Thanksgiving Dinner Will Wreak Havoc on Your Waistline: Ok, Panera Bread does it, it’s time to count the calories on the Thanksgiving Menu this year.

Friends.
Family.
Happiness and health and blah blah blah.

Those are all great things to be thankful for, important things, yes.  But what about the not so important things, the little things that we all take for granted? Here’s what I’m thankful for this holiday season…

10. Trashy Tabloids. Reading about the problems of the rich and famous makes everything in my life seem so much less problematic. Sure, maybe I’m having boy problems, but at least my guy didn’t leave me for Angelina Jolie. And maybe I’m worried about wearing a bikini to the beach, but at least there’s no one zooming in on my butt cheeks. (At least not that I know of.) Celebrity scandal really helps me see the big picture.

9. Steve Madden’s Fall Boot Collection. Whenever I’m having a bad day, I just head over to Steve Madden’s website and stare at some shoes. Laugh if you want, but it totally works. They’re like works of art, I swear. And even though I’ve put myself on a boot buying ban until after the holidays, I still enjoy purusing the styles. And you will too.

8. Chocolate. I’m sorry; do you really need an explanation for this one? I didn’t think so.

7. Iced Caramel Macchiatos. Yes, I know they are overpriced and if ordered correctly can contain more calories than a Big Mac. But I love them and their ability to combine the perfect amount of sweetness and bitterness, to retain the taste of coffee while still allowing me to enjoy the caramel flavor. They feed my caffeine addiction, and for that I am eternally grateful. And the cute guys that work at the local Starbucks don’t hurt either.

6. Thirsty Thursday. An excuse to start the weekend a day early? I’ll take it. Drink specials? Yes please.  A reason not to feel like a couch potato when by Saturday night I’m in sweats watching reality TV and writing The Weekly Ten?  Perfection.

5. Reality TV. By now I think it’s been pretty well established that if women and a television genre could wed, CollegeCandy and reality TV would be on their honeymoon already. But I still had to take a moment and give thanks for the likes of Kim Kardashian and Pauly D. My life would be a whole lot less interesting without them.

4. Wikipedia. Professors always talk about the unreliability of Wikipedia, and maybe that’s true on some accounts.  But whether I can’t remember the name of that actress who played opposite Freddy Prince Jr. in She’s All That (Rachel Leigh Cook) or want a quick plot synopsis on one of Shakespeare’s greatest works, Wikipedia is always there for me. Take that professor!

3. Facebook. The ultimate method of procrastination. The perfect tool for stalking. The place where you can go to find out exactly what happened the night before. A great way to stay in touch. The social networking site that got me off MySpace!  Without Mark Zuckerberg and co., I’d be friendless.

2. Class Cancellations. Last week, my class was unexpectedly canceled. I’d been working on a big paper all weekend, and was less than prepared for my classes that day. And also not entirely sure I’d be able to make it through them without falling asleep halfway through the presentation I was supposed to be giving. Minutes before my alarm went off, my Blackberry beeped. Class was canceled. I hit the snooze button and caught up on my sleep. And it was beautiful.

1. CollegeCandy. The ultimate source for all things college. I stumbled upon this site way before I started writing here and I haven’t been able to keep away since. Why would I? Whether I need guy advice (God, how great is The Dude?!) or a silly distraction or an awesome playlist, CollegyCandy has me covered. And for that I am thankful.

What about you girls? What are you thankful for this Thanksgiving?

[Check out Jenn's other musings-in-the-form-of-a-list here.]

Every Thanksgiving break my suitcase is overflowing with too many shoes and too many outfit options. “Why do I think I need ten sweaters for a five-day break?” I ask myself as I break a sweat lugging my suitcase to the car (then again as I throw the contents of my bag around my childhood room wishing I had actually planned out an outfit rather than just throwing in shirts and dresses I liked and thought I might wear. UGH.).

No longer, girlies.

This year I am packing smart and I’m here to help you do the same. Below, four outfit ideas (Thanksgiving Day, Thanksgiving Dinner, Black Wednesday and Black Friday) that allow you to mix and match as little clothing as possible to get you through the glorious holiday weekend. Not only will this revolutionize the packing process, but will keep you from being “that girl who filled up the trunk so no one else’s stuff would fit” for the drive home and leave you plenty extra space for all the loot you’ll bring back with you on Sunday.

[Click on any image to start the gallery!]

So instead of throwing your entire closet full of clothes into your trunk this Thanksgiving break, try to come up with outfits like these that incorporate basics. Then throw in the other essentials (we’ve got them broken down for you right here). Pack right and you’ll have plenty-o-space for mom’s famous cookies and any other loot you pick up during your weekend at home.

Why should you plan out your packing now?

Because unless you are driving home alone, chances are you have limited packing room. (Do you really want to spend even more money for your overweight suitcase at the airport?) Packing smart helps you to maximize bag room, in order to a) bring home more laundry, b) return to campus with more leftovers and c) return to campus with an entirely new wardrobe.

Are we on the same page now? Here is a guide to items you should pack:

Clothing : Assemble clean outfit options for the first few days before you go home so you’re not scrambling to wash something (or forced to steal something from mom’s closet) before you head out with your high school buds on Thanksgiving eve. I’d take options for Thanksgiving eve, the Thanksgiving eat-a-thon, and Black Friday. By the weekend, you’ll either have a whole new batch of clothing (thanks to mom) or you can re-work what you’ve already got for what will most likely be major couch time.

In order to truly save space, pack smart. I recommend versatile items like leggings and long cardigans to:

1) Maximize eating capacity – the stretchier the clothes, the better.
2) Maximize space - not only are leggings small in a suitcase, but they can be worn dressy or casual, so you can pack fewer items, mix and match the pieces, and get more wear out of all of them.
3) Maximize your Black Friday shopping time – Layering leggings, a tank and a sweater means you can avoid those brutal lines for the dressing room and try everything on right there in the middle of the store!

Down time: This weekend is a break from school, so if you’re lucky enough not to have too much work, take advantage of your down time. Bring your laptop, load up your iPod, grab the stack of magazines you haven’t had time to read,  or (gasp!) a book to read for pleasure. A book is a great distraction from your annoying siblings/cousins/great aunt and it’s an awesome opportunity to start checking off  books on our  list of novels you should read.

School work: I know, the last thing you want to be thinking about during the holidays is school. Unfortunately Thanksgiving is followed by crunch time, and you don’t want to have five assignments to do right when you get back. Bring a couple of your lighter assignments (literally, lighter – you don’t need some 10-pound textbook breaking your back as you run through the airport) home and try to get a little ahead bit ahead before your exams. It’s not only smart planning, but it’s also a great excuse to get away from your parents’ nagging questions.

What not to pack:  Leave behind shampoo, conditioner, your hair dryer, and any other bulky items someone will have at home. They are a waste of space — especially if you want your parents to stock you up on toiletries before you head back.  Remember, you’re going home, not to the moon. If you forget anything big, your parents will be so happy to have you home, they’ll be more than happy to buy it.

Oh, and don’t waste any precious room with those running shoes/workout clothes. It’s an admirable goal, but be honest with yourself – you will not be hitting the gym this weekend.

[Come back later this week for Thanksgiving weekend outfit ideas!]

Whoever said Thanksgiving was a time for family harmony obviously never met the Van Der Woodsen family. I mean, my god, how insanely brilliant was that Thanksgiving feast! It was like the best 7 minutes of Gossip Girl ever. From Vanessa yelling at her uber annoying mom, to Jenny and Erik (“I think your sweet potatoes are bland.” BURN!), to all that extramarital affair business down at the other end of the table, I was jumping off my futon! And to have Jason Derulo playing in the background as it all went down?

I almost died.

And the episode just kept getting better and better.  The only sore spot was that awful puppy-dog look Dan kept giving Vanessa.  Mr. Humphrey, a quick word of advice: do not get involved with that one again. Not only will you risk that awesome friendship, but you will have girls around the country shielding their eyes and yelling “Stop!” whenever you and Vanessa kiss onscreen.

I know – she’s gotten a lot cuter and her fashion choices have definitely improved this season, but I’m still not lovin’ her. It’s bad enough she gets to roll around naked with Chuck Bass in real life; don’t make me steal my other TV boyfriend in Gossip Girl life.

But enough about those two; the real drama award of the day goes, once again, to Serena Van Der Woodsen.  WTF is up with this girl? She’s making it incredibly difficult for me to like her anymore. (I’m pretty sure her wardrobe is the only reason I’m holding on.) It’s like she’s trying to make the worst decisions of all time. OK, I get it. Tripp is sexy, but hooking up with a married man is something I’ve been frowning on lately (especially since I started studying Clinton and Lewinsky in my journalism class). And does she have any idea how ridiculous it would look if some Congressman left his wife and his career for an 18-year-old girl who never went to college?! Although, seeing as she’s still sporting those awful press-on nails, it doesn’t seem like Serena understands ridiculous anymore.

If only Lily had known what she was inviting into her home when she invited Maureen’s woman’s intuition over for Thanksgiving.  That is one crazy wife…she’ll do anything to keep her man.  And that means running away with him, blackmailing with make-out elevator videos, and maybe hitting Serena in a car?  But we’ll find that out next week.

Maybe Serena should just stick to college boys… you know, like poor Nate Archibald.  Instead she’s treating Nate like nothing almost happened last week, hooking up with his cousin (in a freaking elevator) and running away with him instead. Maybe Nate should have told her his feelings without his shirt on…

Oh sorry; got carried away there for a moment. Anyways, this episode left me with a lot of burning questions and they all better be answered fast:

Where was Lily when she was supposed to be engaging in some mother-daughter bonding?
What does Erik have up his sleeve to ruin Queen Bee Jenny?
What on earth is in that damn letter from Doctor Van Der Woodsen?
And how on earth could Lily Van Der Woodsen-Bass-Humphrey (whatever her name is…) be wearing the same jacket at Tripp’s wife? This is the UES, after all.

We better get some answers soon.  Otherwise, there will be some serious Christmas drama on the horizon.

You know you love them.
XOXO.
GGR (Gossip Girl Recapper)

PS. DOROTA IS PREGNANT!  HOW CUTE IS THAT!!!!

Peppermint Mochas are BACK!

I woke up full this morning, my stomach is hanging out over my pajama pants and I have 24 emails in my inbox advertising Black Friday deals at various online stores.

Yup, it’s officially Holiday Season!

While Halloween is my all-time favorite holiday of the year, there is something about the time from Thanksgiving to New Year’s that makes me blissfully happy. Sure, it could be the sheer amount of sugar that is pumping through my bloodstream right now (I ate pumpkin pie and brownies and cookies and apple crisp for dessert last night), but everything about this time of year makes me wanna run and dance and sing… and shop. Seriously, the people making those commercials should get a raise because they work on me every. single. time.

I know I’m not the only one out there who ate until they wanted to barf last night is head-over-heels in love with the holiday season, so this week I asked the CollegeCandy writers to share their favorite things about this time of year.

What do you love most about the holidays (and yes, “getting presents” is a totally acceptable answer).

Ricki – University of Michigan: The holiday music.  It is impossible to get in my car without becoming cheerful.

Ness – Sheridan: My favorite thing about the holiday season is sleeping until (after) noon, and not feeling guilty for missing class. Ah, how I love you Christmas break.

Nina – Michigan State University: I actually really love buying presents for other people. I don’t care that I’m spending inordinate amounts of money when it comes to people I love!

Teresa – UCSD: Hearing cheesy holiday music at the mall. It never gets old!

Kendra  – University of Pittsburgh: My favorite thing about the holiday season is having marathon movie binges with my older sister. There’s nothing better than being rooted to the couch and watching Disney classics, several seasons of Weeds, and every Zac Efron movie ever made while my parents bustle around getting the house ready for guests.

Elizabeth – UC Berkeley: My favorite thing about the holidays is listening to Bing Crosby’s “A White Christmas” without people thinking I’m crazy.

Sarabeth – University of Texas: My favorite thing is the amazing desserts that come out around this time. Eggnog milkshake? Peppermint brownies? Yes please!

Jackelyn – San Francisco State University: Honestly? My favorite thing is knowing that we get ridiculously long and deserving breaks off from school. Oh, that and all the gorgeous lights that everyone puts up!

Thu – USC: Knowing that I will soon wipe everything that I have learned (if anything) over the past few months from my mind and not have to think about school for a while.

Alex K – Lakehead University: My favorite thing about the holidays are holiday movies! Elf, The Santa Clause, even those claymation specials from like 100 years ago! I love it all!

Zahra – Northwestern University: I love that holiday season, for me, is the best of both worlds since I’m from Miami: presents, Christmas music, holiday food, etc. AND an uninterrupted month of lying on the beach.

Carly – Grinnell: I love being with my family around the holidays! Call me old-fashioned, but that warm, fuzzy feeling of being near them makes me so happy.

Lauren – University of Michigan: Mariah Carey’s “All I Want For Christmas Is you” on replay. For 6 weeks straight.

Brithny – Duke: Shopping for clothes that won’t fit until February, but OK with it because dinner feasts provide a legit excuse to pull out the elastic-banded sweatpants for now.

Leah – Ryerson University: Seeing my family for the first time in four months is definitely the highlight for me!

Erica – Kent State University:  Eggnog, hands down.

Katie – Michigan State University:  Sleep. I’m dead serious. I could care less about the food and presents – sleep is what makes my holidays so precious.

Maddie – Tufts: Cranberry bliss bars from Starbucks… sooo good. And being home to devour all my moms cooking. Better whip out the spandex…

Rosie – Duke: My favorite thing is going home to a real mall where I can go shopping all I want on my parents’ expense… and  then run back to school before they get the bill.

Kari – Florida State: I love the Christmas-Carol-only radio stations! It severely diminishes my road rage. Also, all the fun charities and parties that come with the holiday season. Getting to see adorable little kids play with fraternity boy- Santas, then later doing shots with said Santas? Sign me up!

Elise – Stanford: Red cups from Starbucks! Cinnamon flavored everything! Christmas music blasting. No classes!

Desiree – Columbia: Christmas carols are a big, big part of the season for me. As soon as Thanksgiving is over, I put on my “Merry Christmas, Baby” playlist. It’s an eclectic mix of about 120 songs, with selections from everyone from the Jackson 5 to a group playing traditional Turkish instruments. My top picks? Christmas with the Rat Pack and Little Drummer Boy by Jimi Hendrix. I crank up the jams, put on the same Santa hat I’ve had since the 4th grade, and deck the halls.

I'm getting nauseous just looking at this spread...

Unlike the rest of the world, Thanksgiving is my least-favorite holiday. I know, I know—the food, the laziness, the time off from work, the family (well . . . maybe that’s not such a plus)—what’s not to love?

For starters, I am a near vegetarian (I say “near” only because I will eat meat if other people prepare it for me) and I just plain dislike the taste of meat. So while the turkey is the main event for almost everyone I know, it kind of makes me wrinkle my nose. No, thank you.

I’m not above tolerating a meal I don’t like for one day out of the year, but the smell of Thanksgiving food cooking actually makes me feel slightly nauseous. This isn’t just because of the turkey—it’s a long story. (Warning: If you are of the weak stomach, I’d recommend you stop reading now.)

In seventh grade, my family hosted an exchange student from Germany for a couple of weeks in the fall, and we thought it would be fun to make a “practice” Thanksgiving dinner to share with her while she was there so she could experience a new holiday.

I was psyched because I loved Thanksgiving food at the time, and even though my stomach felt a little funny early in the day, I ignored it so I could eat as much of my dad’s delicious Thanksgiving food as possible. This, it turned out, was a terrible mistake. My stomach started feeling worse and worse as the day wore on, and finally I decided to try to down some Pepto-Bismol. I managed to only taste it before my stomach had had enough and proceeded to empty its entire contents… all over the dining-room table. I can’t even explain how traumatizing this was. It’s bad enough to get sick in a place where you don’t have to stare at everything you ate earlier, but to have everyone see what you ate earlier, well, it was quite distressing.

I was really sick for a couple of days, and ever since then, the appeal of Thanksgiving has just been lost to me. I try to hide in my room when the aromas of stuffed turkey, gravy, potatoes, and cranberries drift nearby, but even a stray whiff makes me feel ill. So for the last few years, I’ve just tried to avoid Thanksgiving altogether—a couple of years ago, I went camping with my boyfriend over Thanksgiving weekend, and the following year we prepared a lamb biryani Indian dish. This year, I’m thankfully dating a vegetarian, so he also has no interest in the traditional Thanksgiving spread. We plan to make roasted-vegetable lasagna, and for that, I truly can feel thankful.

Wait...you do WHAT for a living?

Thanksgiving gets increasingly more stressful for me every single year. If I’m not having nightmares about the stuffing running out before it gets passed to me, then I’m biting my nails over the fact that I’ll have to explain my career to my family sixteen times. And let’s not even get started on the fact that I’ve misplaced my expandable waistband jeans and turkey-print mumu. There’s no way I’m sitting down at that table wearing anything else. The last thing I can afford is a busted pair of pants with no buttons and a broken zipper.

I’m pretty sure my own parents can’t figure out exactly how blogging works or how I’m making money — so I have no idea how to even explain it to my grandmother. For years I thought she was computer literate, but it sadly turns out she was convinced that the Windows Paint program was actually the Internet. It certainly explains why she was adamant that my e-mails were never getting to her, but it will also make explaining blogging to her quite the challenge. Perhaps my best bet is to just replace her entire World Book 1965 collection with book covers that say “by Jenni” and tell her that I’ve been writing outdated encyclopedias since graduation.

Even worse than having to explain blogging to a 176-year-old (give or take a few decades) is having to beat around the bush when my younger relatives actually ask to see the blogs. While I’m writing for six different blogs, there is not one that’s appropriate for family members to see. If I’m not writing about one-night stands or pee pranks, then I’m giving advice to elderly men on how to date financially desperate women. And I’ve just ruled out showing this one because I know someone will tattle on me to my grandmother, which means a month from now when my siblings are opening up Chanukah envelopes with crisp 10 dollar bills, I’ll be opening a package marked hazardous that’s filled with my grandmother’s old dentures.

My anxiety ulcers aren’t just coming from having to explain my blogging career, but also from having to spend time with my extended family. When I was little, cramming 12 cousins into 2 beds seemed like a fun challenge. But now that everyone’s grown up (and gained weight) it’s more like every man for himself — if you don’t get a bed or a couch, make yourself cozy under the kitchen table. And beds are nothing compared to the fight over the remote. So help me god if anyone thinks they’re watching anything besides 30 Rock on Thursday night.

For a second I thought that maybe I was overdoing the stress and exaggerating the whole situation. But then my mom just called and gave me the annual lecture about not going out of my way to make my sister cry this year and I realized that I might be better off spending the holiday in my apt — TV remote and bed to myself.