Got a question? Email Tuffy Luv at TuffyLuv@collegecandy.com and get that shiz answered right.

Dear Tuffy Luv,

I dated this guy who I thought was it for 2 years, but I ultimately ended it because he moved away and our relationship became strained and our communications broke down. We planned on seeing where things would go when he came back, but before that happened, we got into a big fight about past things that I thought were non-issues.

We stopped talking for almost a year, but then right before the summer started I began thinking about him more and more. and then ran into him while at his neighbor’s place. We texted each other that day and said that we’re both over all the issues that started the fight. It has been a week since then, and I can’t stop thinking about him. It has caused me to have a lack of sleep, and a lot of stress.

What should I do?

Thanks,
Julie Read More »

Following in the footsteps of VH1’s The Pick Up Artist, comes a similar You-Suck-At-Dating-So-Let’s-Fix-Your-Flaws-Before-You-Start-Throwing-Birthday-Parties-For-Your-Cats show. This time, we watch as GIRLS get some harsh reality about what we do that turn off the MEN. Hosted by the ever beautiful and brutally honest Steve Ward, a master matchmaker and easy-on-the-eyes male, this show follows eight single ladies looking for love as they journey through a “Tough Love Boot Camp.”

Each episode will revolve around one theme and include a Dating 101 class, a field exercise (a date!), and end with a group therapy session where one girl is chosen for doing the worst. Unlike The Pick Up Artist, nobody gets booted off, but the worst contestant will get an embarrassing critique during therapy. This is good news for us viewers because we get to learn some lessons along with the girls (finally, a reality show that’s actually useful!), but thankfully don’t have to do it on national TV!

With issues ranging from trust, intimacy, communication, ex-boyfriends, and the infamous text-aholism, Steve works with these ladies to break their bad habits in hopes of finding The One. Each girl has a classic case of Chase-A-Guy-Away-itis and is nicknamed for their main issue. I’m sure we can all find one girl we relate to the most, so I challenge you to follow your sistah’s progress. Learn some lessons along with your favorite gal and root for her to find love. So, which girl are you? Read More »

Virginity: you either have it, lost it, or in the process of giving it away. (Editor’s Note: If that’s they case, maybe you should focus more on that and stop surfing the internet. You don’t want to offend your partner.) And for most, it is as valued as a relatively sacred part of us – one that you don’t just give to anyone. Take Natalie Dylan, for instance. She ain’t givin it up to any ol boy – she’s givin it up to the highest bidder. That’s right, this lovely lady is in the process of auctioning off her virginity online for upwards of 3.8 million dollars! Let’s be honest – that’s enough money to make any girl twice about keeping her V card. But think a third time, and most of us in our right mind would never do such a thing. But why?

Why is our purity worth an incalculable amount when people used to sell their souls on Ebay for twenty bucks? (I swear it’s true, Ebay started prohibiting it a few years ago).

Many of my close friends are virgins, but they all have varying reasons for their decision. My friend Jenny, for instance, decided not to have sex until she graduated high school. She wanted to wait out of respect for her parents, in addition to various religious reasons. Once she got to college, however, she found that those reasons weren’t as important to her as they once were. Read More »

Once upon a time, I cared a whole lot about my number of sexual partners. I remember hearing a girl in high school tell me she had slept with 5 people, 5 whole people, and I remember thinking, ‘WHOA!!! What a slut! I’m never going to have sex with that many people! Ever!” But, you see, that was when I was religious and very into the idea of marriage…and the idea of waiting for the ‘right one’.

So, I waited for the right one. Two years later, after we’d finally had sex, I knew he wasn’t really the one for me. It was like pushing the Go button on our sexual relationship facilitated him finally showing me who he really was. I maintained some faith and made another guy who was ‘the one’ wait. He broke up with me the day after I finally slept with him; four months into our relationship.

I started to really doubt there was a ‘ONE’ for me. But I still really wanted sex. I longed for it. I didn’t want to be tangled up in emotions anymore. I didn’t want to be a part of the pursuit of my perfect match anymore. I didn’t want to be in love. I didn’t want any of THAT anymore. I just wanted to still have sex. You know why? Cause I thought sex felt really good. Read More »

I’ve been dating for longer than I’d like to admit, and I’ve had my fair share of the good, the bad and the ugly. Over the course of the years, I’ve learned that there are certain subjects that give guys the heebie jeebies and make them run for the hills, no matter how beautiful, smart, talented and desirable you are. So in response to my fellow CC writer, I decided to go into a bit more depth on things not to discuss on a first date…

5. Money: Sure, it’s what makes the world go ’round and as young people, we often have money woes, but it’s a touchy subject that is best to avoid early on. Money can be a point of contention even in the strongest of relationships, so it’s a good idea to keep it out of the picture (aside from the whole payment of the date issue) in the beginning of things.

4. Your Current Drama: Whether it’s a crazy roommate situation, family turmoil, a health problem or as mentioned above, money issues, that’s the last thing a guy wants to hear about when he’s just trying to figure out if he wants to take you out for date number two. While it’s easy to want to vent about what’s stressing us out, save the drama for yo momma or your best friend, or anyone else who knows you well enough to understand your frustrations and help you through them, dumping it on some poor unsuspecting guy will have him dumping you. Read More »