California has always been my dream place to live with its warm weather, hot surfer dudes and that laid back, livin’ the life attitude.  But as of today, my view on the seemingly perfect Cali location has truly changed.  Thanks to the really messed up California Supreme Court Prop 8 decision banning same sex marriages, I started to realize the darkness that lies behind all that sunshine.

There are, in fact, a lot of effed up things about the place that isn’t quite as laid back as I once presumed:

1. You can never escape those dangerous earthquakes that occur a little too often. I don’t know about you, but I like my ground to remain stable, thankyouverymuch. Another thing I like: living without the fear of wildfires burning me to a crisp as I sleep.

2. I can barely watch The Real Housewives of the OC without cringing, and cant imagine having to see these women (and the millions of others just like them in Cali) in real life.  I might freak out, melt down, and have to get Botox to regain any sense of normalcy.

3. Seeing famous people every day might be cool, but knowing that some of the world’s most obnoxious and utterly ridiculous celebrities call that state home kind of turns me off.  I might just gag if I have to see Heidi or Spencer one more time on TV or in a magazine. Seeing them in person? Well, I think I’ll stay on the opposite side of the country.

4. California traffic is known to be ridiculous, and coming from the fast paced New York City lifestyle, I’m not sure that would quite work for me.

5. Most importantly, I’d probably miss my Ugg boots, my mittens, my scarf and ear muffs (oh, and states where gay couples can be married).  And who can turn down a good snowball fight?  Looks like I’ll be spraying on the tan and staying on the East Coast for a while.

Life isn’t black and white. As much as we wish we simply loved or hated things, there is often that whole annoying gray area in the middle. Like how we love the idea of a monokini, but we just don’t know if we can pull it off. Or how we love making money babysitting, but hate giving up a Saturday night. Damn you, gray area; you make decision-making that much more complicated!]

Anyone who knows me knows not to call on Tuesday nights. Not only is it Biggest Loser night, but it also happens to be the best night of my week because of one thing only: The Real Housewives. I don’t care if they are from Orange County, Hot-lanta or New York, I can’t get enough of these women.

Yet now that The Real Housewives of New Jersey are on the (polluted) horizon, I’m starting to feel a little confused inside about my love for couture catfights and $16,000 handbags.

Yes, ladies, I’m torn. It’s time to break it all down. Read More »

Because our usual I Love Money recapper is enjoying a summer vacay (lucky biatch), I was commissioned to watch and recap the most recent episode of the show. Now, I would just like to say that I watch a LOT of bad TV. A lot. My DVR currently holds too many episodes of What Not To Wear, some reruns of The Real Housewives of Orange County, Engaged and Underage and, of course, True Life, I’m a Staten Island Girl.

Yet, knowing all of that, I am still really embarrassed to have watched the trash also known as, I Love Money.

This show is trashier than The Real World, I Love New York and From G’s to Gents (yes, I have watched one episode of that train wreck) combined. I mean, seriously? Is VH1 for real with this show? There are just a bunch of REALLY dumb, really trashy people living in a house together…and having sex with other people in the room. And the names? Whiteboy? The Entertainer? DESTINEY?

I don’t know if I am watching TV or visiting a strip club.

I am not quite sure of the premise of the show, but I assume it is for all these freaks to try and win some money. And on last night’s episode, that somehow included making themselves cry with the aid of onions, cayenne pepper (that some moron RUBBED INTO HER EYES) and even some girl asking a dude to smack her in the face while her teammate tried (so hard) to be upset that she was away from her son.

Yeah. Seriously. Read More »