Looks like MTV has got themselves a Situation.

The fist-pumping “guidos” and “guidettes” of the overnight sensation Jersey Shore are demanding more money for a second season of GTL and hair-poufing.  But wait a sec! Is MTV actually threatening to replace them with new overly muscular guys and shiny orange girls?

The answer is yes. According to TMZ, the network has offered each star $10,000 per episode for the second season and it’s not enough for our favorite juice-heads. I can totally see why; not only are gym memberships and tanning packages expensive, but these kids made a lot of money for MTV and they know it. Now that they’re so big (even Leo DiCaprio knows what GTL is!), they are in a position of power and can demand a whole lot more.

Or so they think.
Rumor has it, if our little Guidos don’t agree to the deal MTV will be replacing them. Read More »

I want to be P. Diddy’s child.

Blonde myths debunked.

Can someone explain what is going on here?

We need to get to Forever 21 now!

What the hell are Kanye and Amber Rose wearing!?

10 situations to be in with The Situation.

From JWoww.com: “Jenni has created the ultimate in fashionable clothing. She will be reinventing the term “Sexy Sophisticated.” Not only will her line be “Edgy” and “Sexy”, but it will make people of all ages and body type feel more confident in “the scene.” This exclusive line will be limited and custom made to your body type.

I love JWoww as much as the next Guidette, especially after she fist pumped The Situation in the face, but “sexy sophisticated“? For “all ages and body types“?

WTF?

Tonight is the season finale of the Jersey Shore.

Let’s all take a moment of silence.

In preparation for this tragic ending I am beginning to practice the coping skills I learned from my therapist to use when dealing with a break-up.  Because this is a break-up. A really painful one.

You see my relationship with The Jersey Shore began like any other meaningful relationship.  I saw a preview and was interested.  I didn’t know exactly what it would offer me, but it seemed attractive enough for me to find out.  I committed to the first episode and was anxious to see how things would go, just like any first date.  By the end…I was hooked.

I am the first to admit my own psychosis…I became a stage five clinger.  I stalked The Jersey Shore by watching YouTube clips, looking for trailers, anything I could.  Our relationship blossomed as I became more and more intrigued with each character and I felt as if I actually lived in the house and could call the Duck Phone my own.  I found myself referring to the characters and constantly contributing my input to their lives.  “Did you SEE that girl The Situation brought home? Even he could do better than that!”

Read More »

Cha CHING

I promised myself I would not fall head over heels for fist pumping and barber shop outings, but as quickly as you can say “duck phone” I was couldn’t stop watching Pauly D burn coal in a gas grill.  Thus opening the doors for a new guilty pleasure to enter my life, formally known as the Jersey Shore.  I’m as confused as you are. If you asked me a month ago if I would be constructing my Guido name on Facebook, I would have told you to go smush yourself.

I’m not the only one smitten for Jersey Shore.  America has fallen in love with the guidettes and Guidos so deeply that 2.1 million people tuned in for the second episode.   Tanning package well spent, Snooki.  Vinny also just (drunkenly, I’m sure) leaked that the show will be coming back for another season of sweatbands and fist pumping in Seaside Heights, and the original cast members won’t be going anywhere. Except to battle it out on the dance floor, that is. And when they do, they’ll be making bank.

As in $30,000! Read More »

It looks like those New Jersey Italians aren’t the only ones with prosciutto beef about MTV’s latest trainwreck, Jersey Shore. Another MTV “star” has his boxers in a bunch about the newest reality series to sweep America off its feet. Yes, everyone’s favorite ass-hat, Spencer Pratt, isn’t so happy with all the attention those overly tanned guidos have been getting.

“Spencer can feel the press moving away from him and on to the cast members of ‘Jersey Shore.’ He is desperate to keep his 15 minutes going. It’s all he has and blames MTV for paying more attention to the new show than to his old show,” laughs a TV executive.

And he should be mad. A tanner, stronger, 6-packier loser has taken his place as MTV’s biggest douche: the one and only Situation. Or has he? I mean, it’s really hard to tell which moron is a bigger dbag, but let’s try. Read More »