Tights Are Not Pants (and Other SoCal Fashion Trends)

Ok. I admit it. I liked a few of the fashion changes that happened when I moved from the frozen tundra of NYC to the warmer Southern California climate. Gone are the turtlenecks and heavy jackets (have you ever tried to look sexy while resembling a marshmallow). They are replaced by slinky tops and leather jackets.

Heck, I can even dig the change from heels to flip-flops and gladiator sandals. It’s so much easier to walk back to your room at four in the morning when you don’t have to worry about stepping on broken glass. However, there are a few fashion statements that I can never understand.

1. Wearing scarves when the weather drops below 70. I’m from NYC, so I thought I understood scarves. You wear them when it’s ten below zero to keep you face from freezing off. Or, on the off chance that you forget your concealer and turtleneck at home, you wear it to your Monday morning class to cover up the massive bruise on your neck. But nothing in the world will convince me that the thin piece of fabric wrapped three times around your throat is doing anything to keep you warm. Especially when all you’re wearing with it is a miniskirt and Uggs. This brings me to my next fashion complaint.

2. Uggs. Has anyone ever actually looked at these monstrosities? Everyone constantly complains about the loser who wear Crocs, but no one says a word about these bad boys. And I hate to break it to you, but they do not make your feet look cute. In fact, they are down-right hideous. I realize that they’re comfy. Flips-flops serve the same function. I understand that they’re warm. Wear comfy sneakers and toe socks, or even fur lined boots. Only please, could you wear shoes that don’t resemble a cross between something out of a Tolstoy novel and a six years old drawing? Uggs. Ugly. See the resemblance. Please don’t wear the shoes. Read More »