Okay, so I don’t know if you ladies have heard the news, but apparently Sean Penn and Scarlett Johansson are actually dating, which really just makes my skin crawl. I mean the girl is legitimately half his age. It’s weird and it’s creepy. And since I am forever grateful that Scarlett let go of Ryan Reynolds so we could some day find each other and be together, I felt it my duty to at least point that out.

But in the process, their creepy crawly relationship got me thinking about all of the other creepy celebrity couples I’ve encountered over the years. And, well, there were actually quite a few of them. Ugh, my stomach is churning. Read More »

These days in Hollywood, the children of celebrities are often overlooked. They’re more like the perfect accessory to an already awesome outfit than actual people. They’re like that great new designer everyone is wearing, but one that won’t ever go out of style. So we forget sometimes that these kids are actual people with actual lives. And the celebrities we fawn over are actually their parents. Like, their real parents. Just like ours…

Or not.

And well, we can’t help but think that for some of them, that must really, really suck. But for others, they’re living the life we dream about as we lay in bed late at night (after our Jake Gyllenhaal/Mark Salling threesome fantasy ends). So we did some research, some analyzing, figured out the networth pros and cons of each of these celebrity parents and so we propose to you the celebrities we’d love to have play parent to us…and those we wouldn’t even want as distant relatives. Read More »

I am a chronic list-maker, whether I have to make a difficult decision or not.  Lists help me organize my thoughts and remember important facts and details that I need for later.  However, there are some things that I would rather forget and that’s what this week’s showdown concerns.

Celebrity couples are hideous beasts born of the 24-hour news and gossip cycles and there are none more powerful than Brangelina and TomKat.  But which one is worse?  Which one makes you want to throw your TV out the window, turn off your computer, and hide your iPhone just so you never have to hear what ridiculous name they’re giving to their 17th adopted baby?  Such a difficult decision, but we can work through it. Read More »

Dianne Wiest. John Lithgow. Arthur Miller. Broadway. Katie Holmes.

Figure it out yet? Of course you have, because Katie Holmes on Broadway seems to fit as much as Katie Holmes accepting an Oscar, which is to say that it absolutely doesn’t fit. (And because there is a big picture of Katie Holmes at the top of this post)

But fit it must as Katie Holmes is in talks to make her Broadway debut in the Arthur Miller classic All My Sons alongside acting pros Dianne Wiest and John Lithgow. The Daily Mail also points out that not only is it Katie’s first turn on Broadway, but also her first play since high school.

I’m willing to eat my hat if Katie can pull this one out, but I honestly can’t see how this will end well. Not only will she be overwhelmed by the material (All My Sons isn’t exactly Mad Money) but she will be acted into a corner by Wiest and Lithgow.

That being said, as pessimistic as I am about the project, I do find myself rooting for her just a little. When she was on Dawson’s Creek, I just remember being generally annoyed not so much by Katie Holmes’ acting, but by her character in general. And she did alright in The Gift, if I can remember correctly (and girlfriend took it off. Gotta give her her props for that.) It’s just that Katie Holmes isn’t an actress anymore, not really. She’s become a caricature, or, more nicely, a personality, because of this whole Tomkat nonsense.

If she is thinking of this as a boost to her career, well, her career sure needs one of those. I guess it couldn’t hurt.