I used to love ANTM. Ever since 2003, thanks to the CW, and the countless marathons on VH1 and MTV, I’ve been obsessed with all things Top Model. I remember Shandi’s “Shanthrax” t-shirts, drunk Brittany, Nicole being a crybaby, crazy-ass Jade… and literally screaming at my TV when Whitney was crowned Top Model of cycle 10. Now, however, on Cycle 12 it feels as if my love for ANTM may have run its course. Is it worth my Wednesdays? I’m torn.

Love It:

Why do we love any reality show? Not for the photo sessions; it’s obviously about the drama. The issues that come from 13 girls competing for the title of “prettiest” living together in a house is undeniable, and makes for many memorable moments. Remember when Shandi cheated on her boyfriend with the male model? Or when Joanie had her teeth pulled? How about Camille and her “signature walk” that was supposed to “make her famous?” And then there was Melrose always tried to give “advice” to everyone…

Bottom line: the “drama” in the show is funny! I’m sure it was a huge deal to Cycle 7’s Jaeda to get her hair cut short, but watching her melt down and cry because of it was hilarious for me!

If the contestants aren’t ridiculous enough, Tyra Banks is the creator and top-judge of the program. Don’t get me wrong, I love Tyra as a model and her talk show is a guilty pleasure on sick-days, but on ANTM she is just plain crazy. That being said, I will never get sick of  her wacky outfits and hairstyles, her bizarre criticism of the girls, her desire to be a photographer or her constant reminders to “smile with your eyes!” Plus she sings the show’s theme song! Girl does it all. Read More »

Okay, for a while, Tyra Banks‘ schtick was cute. On Top Model, she was bold and she was out there, walking the runway of Fierce Supermodel World. She definitely taught those young, naive models-in-the-making how to work it out and she always knew how to bring out the drama and make me tune in, week after week, marathon after marathon. I was a Tyra fan at one point, because she had just enough of that different personality to catch my attention.

Then, she got her own talk show and decided it was time to push her “I’ll say and do anything for ratings” image. Now, she’s a complete nut bag, she’s all over the television no matter what time of day it is, no matter what channel you turn to, and it’s like – okay. You’re crazy, Tyra. You’re out of your mind. We get it. Now shut up.

They say three strikes and you’re out. Well, here are just three of Tyra’s many recent strikes that have sent her from fierce to f*cking crazy:

1. This clip of Tyra going bat-shit crazy for Vaseline. Hey, I like petroleum jelly just as much as the next girl – it’s great for make-up remover and whatever else your dirty minds can cook up. But do I love it as much as she does? Should anyone love it as much as she does? Ummm, no. Read More »

Wednesday’s America’s Next Top Model was one for the books. Here’s a rundown:

- As a challenge, the girls had to give themselves fake, one-word “model” names, like “Melrose” or “Giselle”. One of them picked the name “Wholahey,” pronouced “whoooolahaaayyy. So dumb, I LOVES IT. Even dumber? Wholahey WON the challenge!

- Sarah got the boot. She annoyed me from the start, always thinkin her s*&% d’int stank because she was a “professional photographer” and did a fashion show for “Chanel”. Which really means, she posts a lot of pictures on Myspace taken with her disposable camera, and did some cheesy runway show at the local mall in front of the Chanel store.

- There were celebrities at the same party attended by the models themselves! What are the chances?!? We got to watch them awkwardly mix and mingle with them. 50 Cent was so irritatated by Jael bein’ all up in his grill that he pushed her in the pool and she thought it was funny. Well, so did I.

- Ms. Nicole Ritchie herself got involved with some roommate drama when she asked Renee in “confidence” what she thought of the girls, and after Renee told Nicole that she hated Jael, Nicole went behind her back and told Jael exactly what Renee had said! Whew. Scandelous!

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Really skinny girls dressing up as men. Yep, that’s my idea of entertainment.

My weird choice in TV shows aside, I think last week’s Top Model shoot should have been considered ‘adolesent-boy’ drag because not one of those beanpole girls could pull off a mature male look. Sure, Natasha’s hip-hop guy pose looked the most like a real dude, but that’s only when her body wasn’t included in the shot.

Which brings me to the elimination portion of the episode — buh-bye, Diana. It’s funny, but also not surprising that one of the ‘plus-sized’ models was voted off. After all, isn’t this show about finding the ‘ideal’ model? Ya know, the one who doesn’t eat, but still has a great personality and drive for success? Read More »