Love It:

Why do we love any reality show? Not for the photo sessions; it’s obviously about the drama. The issues that come from 13 girls competing for the title of “prettiest” living together in a house is undeniable, and makes for many memorable moments. Remember when Shandi cheated on her boyfriend with the male model? Or when Joanie had her teeth pulled? How about Camille and her “signature walk” that was supposed to “make her famous?” And then there was Melrose always tried to give “advice” to everyone…

Bottom line: the “drama” in the show is funny! I’m sure it was a huge deal to Cycle 7′s Jaeda to get her hair cut short, but watching her melt down and cry because of it was hilarious for me!

If the contestants aren’t ridiculous enough, Tyra Banks is the creator and top-judge of the program. Don’t get me wrong, I love Tyra as a model and her talk show is a guilty pleasure on sick-days, but on ANTM she is just plain crazy. That being said, I will never get sick of  her wacky outfits and hairstyles, her bizarre criticism of the girls, her desire to be a photographer or her constant reminders to “smile with your eyes!” Plus she sings the show’s theme song! Girl does it all.

Finally, ANTM rocks because of one man: Nigel Barker. The multiracial “noted fashion photographer” and former model is so tasty. As if his face (and body!) weren’t enough, he also has that sexy British accent. Oh, and a wife. And two kids. But do you see any of them on the show? No. So for an hour each week we can dream.

Loathe It:

The show is getting boring. The same challenges are used yearly (we’ve seen the go-see challenge and ‘risque’ photo shoots practically every cycle) and it’s fairly easy to tell who’s going home on each episode because it’s generally the girl who gets the most interview time. Nothing is really unexpected at this point, the only thing that changes is what the girls fight about (granola bars?) and who wins.

I don’t know if this bothers anyone else, but I personally hate the constantly-changing real-model judge. First it was Janice Dickenson, then Twiggy, and now Paulina. Janice, even more than Tyra herself, was absolutely ridiculous, which made for some very hilarious and uncomfortable situations. Twiggy took some getting used to, but just as I was starting to warm up to her, Paulina had to step up! And homegirl is kiiiind of a beezy. Thank goodness Miss J (and Nigel!) are still on the panel, or the whole judging thing would be snooze worthy.

The biggest problem with the show however, is that the actual contestants seem to be getting more and more boring, in both their looks and actions. Where are the edgy girls? Or the girls of different races or culture? I don’t see them anymore! If that wasn’t bad enough, apparently when this cycle was filming, producers and camera people actually had to create drama for the girls to fight about so the show would be semi-interesting. It seems that competitive, tall, pretty girls just aren’t entertaining anymore. For this reason, the producers of the show have cooked up a great idea for the next season: allowing ONLY girls 5’7” and under to compete. Are short girls more evil memorable? We better hope that they are, or the next season will be even worse than the last two!

Final verdict? As long as Gossip Girl stays on Mondays, and Grey’s is on Thursdays, I’ll continue to devote an hour each Wednesday to Top Model (because what else would I do?). Otherwise I guess I’ll be seeing Tyra and the gang in syndication on VH1. Maybe.

Are any of you still watching ANTM, or are you over it? Let me know in the comments section!

Then, she got her own talk show and decided it was time to push her “I’ll say and do anything for ratings” image. Now, she’s a complete nut bag, she’s all over the television no matter what time of day it is, no matter what channel you turn to, and it’s like – okay. You’re crazy, Tyra. You’re out of your mind. We get it. Now shut up.

They say three strikes and you’re out. Well, here are just three of Tyra’s many recent strikes that have sent her from fierce to f*cking crazy:

1. This clip of Tyra going bat-shit crazy for Vaseline. Hey, I like petroleum jelly just as much as the next girl – it’s great for make-up remover and whatever else your dirty minds can cook up. But do I love it as much as she does? Should anyone love it as much as she does? Ummm, no.

2. Her dress at the Daytime Emmy Awards. WTF is this? Not only is it an ugly dress, but I hate it when you can tell a celebrity is only wearing an outfit for attention, and not because he or she actually likes it. I don’t care who designed this or how expensive it is; this is almost as bad as Brooke Hogan’s denim, assless chaps….almost.

3. Tyra demonstrating on her talk show, in front of her live audience and millions of confused viewers how to pee without sitting on the toilet seat. “You gotta pull your panties forward, and then pee.” Wow. Thanks, Tyra. I had no idea. Is anyone else kind of insulted by her need to actually pop a squat for us?

I think Ms. Banks should take a nice, long vacation, get some rest and come back to us when she’s good, rested and not quite as insane.

Nothing a little Vaseline can’t cure, right?!?

- As a challenge, the girls had to give themselves fake, one-word “model” names, like “Melrose” or “Giselle”. One of them picked the name “Wholahey,” pronouced “whoooolahaaayyy. So dumb, I LOVES IT. Even dumber? Wholahey WON the challenge!

- Sarah got the boot. She annoyed me from the start, always thinkin her s*&% d’int stank because she was a “professional photographer” and did a fashion show for “Chanel”. Which really means, she posts a lot of pictures on Myspace taken with her disposable camera, and did some cheesy runway show at the local mall in front of the Chanel store.

- There were celebrities at the same party attended by the models themselves! What are the chances?!? We got to watch them awkwardly mix and mingle with them. 50 Cent was so irritatated by Jael bein’ all up in his grill that he pushed her in the pool and she thought it was funny. Well, so did I.

- Ms. Nicole Ritchie herself got involved with some roommate drama when she asked Renee in “confidence” what she thought of the girls, and after Renee told Nicole that she hated Jael, Nicole went behind her back and told Jael exactly what Renee had said! Whew. Scandelous!

- And the best part of the show, hands down, was when Tyra hosted a confrontation to “help” Renee in her ongoing battle between the rest of the contestants. In previous episodes, Renee emerged as the house bully, basically saying that plus size models will never make the cover of Vogue. She also bitches everytime she does badly during photoshoots and blames her crappy pictures on everyone else. Plus, she talks like a man. So, Tyra had Renee sit and face all of the girls. One by one, each girl told Renee what she didn’t like about her. After they were finished, Renee tried to be tough, but ended up crying like a baby. Tyra sat next to her and pretended to be concerned, but just saw the ratings go up with every tear. Whatever. This girl had it comin’. Nice move, Tyra. You always know where to hit em where it hurts! I wonder if she studied up on how to handle a confrontation before throwing Renee into the lion’s den. I wonder….

Click here to watch some household model drama unfold. Notice how Renee plays the helpless victim, and then threatens the contestants with a violent beating. Yea, this girl could totally throw down. All 75 pounds of her. I can’t wait to see if Renee shapes up next week and exposes the sweet, sensitive girl inside. And hey – if she doesn’t win the title of Top Model, she can always look into Ultimate Fighting! Riiight.

Really skinny girls dressing up as men. Yep, that’s my idea of entertainment.

My weird choice in TV shows aside, I think last week’s Top Model shoot should have been considered ‘adolesent-boy’ drag because not one of those beanpole girls could pull off a mature male look. Sure, Natasha’s hip-hop guy pose looked the most like a real dude, but that’s only when her body wasn’t included in the shot.

Which brings me to the elimination portion of the episode — buh-bye, Diana. It’s funny, but also not surprising that one of the ‘plus-sized’ models was voted off. After all, isn’t this show about finding the ‘ideal’ model? Ya know, the one who doesn’t eat, but still has a great personality and drive for success?

It’s nice that they have ‘bigger’ contestants, but let’s be realistic here. They’re the token ‘thick’ girls. The ones with the pretty faces whose sole purpose is to show us unsuspecting viewers that a big girl can make it to the top 15 or whatever. Come on, I’m not stupid; I’m on to you CW.

Anyway, tonight’s episode should be quite interesting since each model will have to come up with a “nickname for her persona.” Apparently, Twiggy explains to them how she became known as, well, Twiggy. Ha — I can imagine it now … “Um, I’d call myself Waifey,” “My nickname is Stringbean,” “I think Stickthin personifies me.”

If it’s not about being thin, I’m very curious to learn why Twiggy got her nickname.

Watch the photo shoot recap here.