YES! YES! YES!: My First All-Nighter

23732105.jpgMy first all-nighter at the end of my freshman year taught me some important lessons about what my mind and body is capable of when placed under the stress that is going without sleep for more than 24 hours.

1) Between 3 and 5 a.m. I am incapable of forming coherent sentences on paper and possibly aloud. I have some stellar thoughts, complex ideation that I am incapable of during normal waking hours. But when it comes to recording them, I have the language capability of a non-Einstein like fourth grader trying to write about quantum physics.

It’s funny in retrospect, but it makes me want to jab a pencil in my eye when I need that thought to get me through a paragraph or two at 6 a.m., when I’m able to write again.

2) Hot chocolate disappoints like no other, as it’s more of a distraction than an aide in concentration. Marshmallows – either their presence or the mere of idea of them melting sugary goodness in your cup – are the funnest thing ever when you’ve been studying pre-colonial African history for seven hours.

Coffee will never let me down, but hot chocolate is more of a party in my mouth kind of beverage and not quite the upper I wanted and needed it to be.

3) If I end the 24 hour no-sleep-athon with a 20 minute run, upon beginning my cool down, I will have an orgasm. Read More »


My Exercise Pet Peeves

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Despite the fact that I have been experiencing severe tail-bone pain for the past two weeks (due to a semi-drunken tumble down a flight of stairs), I have been attempting to keep up with my five-days-a-week gym schedule. Any other time of year and I probably would just take advantage of the fact that my ass is a lovely shade of eggplant and sleep in instead. But, being that everyone else in the world is using this month to get in shape, I felt motivated to do the same.

Being that I can’t partake in my usual morning classes (spinning with this bruise? Not a chance), I have been forced to return to the cardio floor. And my return has reminded me why I have been avoiding it for so long. Maybe it is because it is so early in the morning, or maybe it is because I really hate being at the gym until my workout is actually over and I’m sipping on my coffee, but there are some gym people that are just starting to piss me off.

There may not be a list posted anywhere, but there are some unspoken rules regarding gym etiquette that everyone is supposed to abide by. Like warning someone before they set up all their stuff and begin working out that the treadmill is broken. Not after when they nearly fall off and break their necks because the belt was sticking. (Welcome to my morning).

Sorry. I’m getting angry all over again, but I am sure I am not alone in my frustration. So here is a list of my biggest Gym Pet Peeves. Let us all commiserate together. Read More »


80’s Music Makes You Skinny

80s-music.jpgI don’t really exercise. Don’t care for it too much. My excuse being, I live in Manhattan and walk constantly, so shut up.

On the rare occasion that I am feeling spunky, however, I will work out and take it to the Elliptical, a.k.a the Poor Man’s Treadmill, just like this hottie. But I cannot and will not work out, if I don’t have good music to help me on my sweaty, fat-burning journey. And that music best suited for my JOURNEY? 80′s music. Journey. 80′s music.

The New York Times just featured an article on the effect that certain songs have on us while we exercise, and while it’s not all that exciting or earth-shattering to read that faster songs correspond to a faster heart rate (NO SH*T, really?) it is pretty interesting to see some of the suggestions of songs to add to our playlists, to help pump us up and keep us motivated.

Self.com is a website after my own heart, as the NYTimes article mentions they chose Wake Me Up Before You Go-Go as a workout playlist hit. There is nothing like a good Wham! classic to really get me going. Which got me thinking of one of my personal workout faves which is also from the 80′s, called Baby I’m a Star. It was originally sung by Prince, but in my opinion, The Lil’ Soul Man does it waaay better. Plus, his backup dancers are rocking those shoulder pads, and his wig is amazing. Read More »


An Inconvenient Truth About Elliptical Machines

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Bad news New Years Resolutionites: looks like all that work you are doing at the gym isn’t quite as impressive as you have been lead to believe. Nor will it lead to the extreme or quick results you have been counting on. A recent article in the New York Times is claiming that the calorie counters on your favorite machines – especially the cherished, Elliptical – are wrong. Sometimes way wrong.

This news isn’t a total shock to most people – I mean, unless you are slightly delusional or in denial, you should be able to tell that a 30 minute stint on the cross-trainer could not possibly burn 500 calories – but it is still a little disconcerting. What is the point of having calorie counters on machines if they are so off? And how many calories am I burning during my workout? Read More »