Miley’s not dead!!! YAY!

Brad Pitt channeling Charlie Chaplin!

Men are taking advantage of Paris Hilton!

What’s the right bang?

What’s gonna change now that change has come?

Baby Simpson-Wentz tricks Mommy!

Wanna roll in the benjamins? Don’t become a professor!

Shampoo gone bad? It’s still useful…

The world’s youngest king…

…and hottest Prime Minister

Man eaten alive by tigers…yikes!

Jamie-Lynn Sigler hearts Turtle? Yes, it’s true.

How sick are you of Billy Mays?

It’s no secret that here at CC, we love Entourage. HBO and Showtime never cease to entertain with shows like Dexter, Weeds, and True Blood, but for some reason, Entourage has always held a special place in our hearts (and no, it’s not just because of this).

Besides the witty and quippy writing, Entourage is almost always hilarious, last night’s episode being no exception (everyone trips on shrooms in the desert and Ari desperately calls Lloyd to get him through his ordeal). The characters are strange yet likeable, and the Hollywood “scene” has never been drawn quite so wackily. So yeah, we love the show. Love it enough to stay up late on a Sunday night or TiVo it to watch immediately after work.

But here’s the thing: there’s pretty much no way to feel good about your body once the credits roll. A show created, produced, directed, and mostly written by men, Entourage is bursting at the seams with “hot” women. I’ve been watching for 5 seasons, and I honestly can’t remember a time when a female character was anything less than absolute runway material.

Everyone has big boobs. Everyone is thin and tall enough to dunk a b. ball like Michael Jordan. It’s like the casting director opened up a Victoria’s Secret catalogue, pointed to every single girl in there, and made sure she got a spot on the show. Like the producers walked around Vegas with Pied Piper flutes and somehow made the entire population of showgirls, strippers, and car models follow them to LA (perhaps they offered them cookies that would eradicate cellulite?).

This got me thinking; Entourage is great and all, but most likely, it’s written with dudes in mind. Most of the guys in Vinny’s group are less than perfect (E’s four feet tall, Turtle looks like one, Drama isn’t hot in the least, and Ari is on the old side), and yet, they get all the vajayjay they could ever hope for from beautiful chicks who disappear from the plot as soon as they’ve served their purpose.

I’m not trying to be a killjoy; it’s obvious that we love hot strippers and girls with big boobs, but WTF?! There’s more women in the US than there are men — shouldn’t we be granted the right to A) see girls who represent more than just the small model percentage, and B) at least a few guys who are super smokin’?!

We wouldn’t dream of getting pissed off at our favorite show (it’s like getting mad at that adorable frat boy for falling asleep on your shoulder after shotgunning 9 beers), but it seems pretty obvious to us that Entourage could certainly improve it’s female following if they took into consideration just how sensitive some of us are to how we’re represented on screen.

What do you think? Should Entourage change it’s ways, or stay just the same?

TV is coming back with a bang tonight. Not only is there an extra episode of “The Hills” delighting LC-obsessed girls worldwide, but we also have the VMAs, and, of course, the return of Entourage!

I. can’t. wait. It has been waaay too long since the last time I got to follow the life of Vinny Chase and the rest of the boys of L.A. So long, in fact, that I haven’t even been having my usual “steamy night with Vincent Chase” dreams. And I miss those.

The truth is, though, that Vincent isn’t even the only one worth fantasizing about. Every guy on the show – including Turtle – is well worth a roll in the sack:

Vincent Chase – He’s hot. End of story.

Ari Gold – He’s a dirty talking business man who will fulfill your fantasies of wiping all his sh*t off the desk, throwing you down and doing naughty things to you in the middle of the office.

Eric Murphy – He’s a hard worker who will do anything to succeed. Success in the bedroom = an orgasm for you.

Turtle – He’ll get you high on the best weed in town. After that, the sex doesn’t really matter.

Johnny Drama – The sex may not be that great, but he’ll make you a gourmet breakfast in the morning.

Lloyd – He probably…er…most definitely doesn’t want to sleep with the ladies, but he would be a great gay best friend to snuggle with on Sunday mornings.

Which guy of Entourage would you want one night with?

Not only was it entertaining, but the show provided some great lessons for all of us.

Let’s start with Turtle, who has finally found lurve. The only thing is, her father is scary and super protective, so they both have to sneak around. She’s definitely making Turtle work for her affection – making him take off his hat at lunch and making him reveal his actual name? Get it, girl. This is a good lesson for all girls – if a guy is into you, he will do whatever it takes to win your heart…either that, or just get you into bed.

Drama is also having a lot of luck, but in the career department. With his TV show a hit, he was offered an audition for Rush Hour 3: only the producer messed up the names, and it was actually his younger co-star who was given the audition.

Drama doesn’t find this out until he’s livin’ it up at the director’s house/pool party, and is so determined to win a part in the movie that he refuses to leave until a part opens up for him. The director admires this (and just really wants Drama to go away) so he offers him the part of a bus driver. Another good lesson – you gotta keep going for what you want and never settle for less. With some balls, you can get far in life! Figuratively speaking, of course.

Then we have Ari, E and Vince, who are more a team than ever. After chumming it up with their movie’s new money-backers, a wealthy husband and his crazy, Russian wife, Vince is conVINCED (haha) that the wife wants to sleep with him, and she totally does want to sleep with him. Can you blame her?

After requesting to meet with Vince alone, he’s so freaked out by her that he brings along his security blanket, a.k.a, E. The Russian is offended that Vince assumed she wanted sex, and storms off. In a weird turn of events, the couple still invites the boys over for dinner and to confirm the movie is a done deal. Just as Vince is heading outside to the pool, the husband tells him he wants his wife to be happy, and if Vince really wants this movie, he will have to go upstairs and sleep with her, no questions asked.

And then the episode ended.

Scandelous! I doubt anything more will come of this, but you know Vince obliged to the offer and got his movie deal and some booty. This guy can’t get any luckier.

So what’s the lesson in this one? Sometimes, you just gotta take one for the team. (As long as it’s okay with their significant other, of course).

In two weeks, Drama tries to find a place of his own to move into. Without their live-in chef, what are the boys gonna do for food? And it was also announced that there will be all new episodes of Entourage throughout the whole summer. Weee!

While Ari, E and Vince’s storylines took a backseat, it was Turtle and Drama that had their day in the sun…er, night under the moon, I should say. Which was nice, because it definitely changed things up a bit for the boys.

Turtle goes to get Drama’s car detailed and cleaned, and while he’s there, he meets a cute girl who shares his interest in trendy sneakers. Hey, everybody’s got their thing, right? She’s into him (I guess Turtle is cute, in a teddy bear kinda way) and after convincing her intimidating father, who owns the car shop, to let him take his daughter out, Turtle leaves with a hot car and a hot date. Nice to see he can score the chicks without Vince by his side!

Is Entourage losing its’ steam?

Meanwhile, Drama wakes up to find his new TV show has been reviewed by all of the critics and he refuses to read them. He instead decides to relax at a “massage parlor” and is so distressed while his masseuse is “doing her thing” that he can’t “finish the deed.” Catch my inuendos? He has to read his review in Variety, and it’s not good. The best scene of the entire episode is Drama furiously heading down to the Variety headquarters and hunting down and reeming out the critic who always seems to give him horrible reviews. But it’s not just this critic who hates it; it’s every critic. Seems like Drama can’t catch a break, and even his so-fresh, so-clean car doesn’t help. He drives off, has a breakdown and ends up in Arizona where he spends the night wallowing in his crappy acting skills. Poor Drama! I love this guy.

In the end, Drama wakes up in his car as the boys call him to find out where the hell he’s been, and also to inform him that his show is a hit! Turns out it got great ratings. Should be interesting to see the dynamic between him and Vince, now that there’s more than one celebrity in the house.

Speaking of the house, it seems like the boys are gonna have to move out and find a smaller place – they’ll have less money to spend now that they bought the Mediian script for 5 million bucks! Like usual, Vince spends most of his time trying to get his dream movie made about Pablo Escobar. Ari and E are faithfully on his side, going back and forth with the money backers and producers – they have the script, and then they don’t. They have a chance and then they don’t. Vince decides to play hard ball for once, and with E’s money, they buy the script themselves and take on the challenging role of producers. Ari gets his favorite client back, as Vince agrees to resign with his company for all of the hard work Ari has been putting in to help.

Finally, Vince has a real shot at making this movie, which is good, because this storyline was getting too drawn-out and annoying. Now he can finally shut up, stop whining and just take off his shirt already.

After a day at the horse races, Drama falls in love with one of the horses, and although his particular horse failed to take first place, he falls in love with it and buys it off of the trainer in fear the horse will be taken to the glue factory. Hmmm…in love with a horse? That reminds me….Just kidding.

The horse is hauled back to the casa and ends up running out the gates. Definitely too much responsibility for these guys. Drama gives the horse away as a gift to his TV director, Ed Burns, whose daughter is more than happy to take the horse off his hands. Whatever! I love animals, but if someone dropped off a horse on my front lawn and said, “Look what I bought! It’s for YOU!” I would be pretty pissed to say the least. But I don’t even have a front lawn, so I guess I have nothing to worry about.

Meanwhile, it’s Yom Kippur for the Gold household. Ari and his family are spending the day at synogogue when he gets word that the movie Vince has been dying to land for two years might be back on. But there’s only one problem – Ari is no longer Vince’s agent, and Amanda, his new agent, refuses to believe that the movie is possible. The episode is all about Ari trying to get Vince on board, Amanda to help out, and avoiding his wife who won’t let him talk on his beloved cell phone on a holy day. You gotta hand it to him; he’s one hell of a multi-tasker.

In the end, the movie is a no-go. The head of the project backs out. Vince comes to the conclusion that Amanda has been so hesitant about the movie because she wanted him all to herself instead of sending him off to anothery country to shoot for six months. After realizing that Amanda is actually a better and more caring agent than he thought, and isn’t some love-struck puppy, he feels like an idiot. Only, it’s too late. She leaves him at the restaurant and says that “it’s time to say goodbye,” which can only mean that she’s dumping him as not only a sex buddy, but as a client.

Next week, the movie is once again back on. Geez, will they just start making it already? It’s getting annoying, this back and forth thing. And will Vince just re-hire Ari again? He obviously wants to. Why are they playing these stupid games? Ugh! I’m so aggrivated. I think it’s my hangover talking. Note to self: next Cinco de Mayo, no margaritas.

Yea, right.