Week after week (after week after week…), CollegeCandy and our pal John bring you some of the weirdest, funniest, and saddest things he hears on his college campus. And we know he’s not the only one who hears this stuff. Join the Overheard revolution! Listen in on some weirdos’ conversations and share them in the comments or send ‘em over to us to put in next week’s post.

(Guy, two girls, at dining hall breakfast.)

Guy: You girls don’t need your buns toasted, do you?

Girl 1: Heh-heh-heh-heh-heh.

Girl 2: Heh heh. No.

Guy: I was talking about the hot dog buns.

(Girl, on the phone, on a campus thoroughfare.)

Girl: I wish you didn’t have a penis!

(Beat)

Girl: Well, then I wish you would stop jerking off in the shower! Read More »

"Hm. That doesn't smell right..."

Got a health question? Don’t trust those “Doctors” at the University Health Center? Are you scared of Web M.D. because it always tells you you’re gonna die? Ask a real doctor, our friend Dr. Lissa Rankin. She’s here every Thursday to answer whatever you throw at her – like the ultimate cure for a hangover! – so ask away. Leave your question in the comments or send it over to us. Don’t be shy; she’s waiting for ya!

Q: After unprotected sex I noticed my urine becoming really smelly on a consistent basis, which is a new thing for me. There are no other symptoms-no burning or itching or anything, just the smelliness when I pee. Could this be an STD??

A: Usually, healthy urine has almost no odor (unless you’ve been feasting on asparagus or other foods or vitamins that are known offenders).  If you are dehydrated, your urine will be more concentrated and may have a stronger smell. Also, if bacteria have contaminated the normally sterile urinary system, which happens when you have a urinary tract infection, you may notice an odor.

Most of the time, when women approach me complaining of foul-smelling urine, they’re actually smelling their vagina. If you have a vaginal infection, such as bacterial vaginosis or trichomonas vaginalis, you may notice that your vaginal discharge, when it mixes with your urine, smells icky.

While it could be a sexually transmitted disease, such as trichomonas infection, which causes a vaginal infection characterized by a foul-smelling odor, most STD’s do not cause your urine to smell. Sex however, can trigger urinary tract infections, and infected urine may smell icky.

I would suggest a visit to the gynecologist. Make sure they check out your vagina, as well as your urine, to make sure there are no infections either place. And if you’ve had unprotected sex, go ahead and get tested for everything while you’re there. You can set a good example for your partner and feel more secure about next time.

–Dr. Lissa Rankin’s book, What’s Up Down There? Questions You’d Only Ask Your Gynecologist If She Was Your Best Friend, will be published by St. Martin’s Press in Fall 2010. She invites you to join her Pink online community (www.owningpink.com/forum) or read more of her writing at Owning Pink (www.owningpink.com).

Every week, CC and John bring you some of the weirdest, funniest, saddest things he hears on his college campus. Join the Overheard revolution!Leave your own overheard convos in the comments or send ‘em over!

(Guys, walking through a grove on-campus.)

Guy: Nice day… birds, blue skies, not a cloud in sight. Yup. This rock looks pretty good to take a crap on.

(Older student, talking to high schooler on campus tour.)

Student: There’s actually a statistic, I think, something like 30 percent of the liquid of water parks is urine.

High schooler: Yeah, that sounds pretty reasonable. That’s about right.

Student: What the f***? No it’s not! That would be disgusting!

(Guy, preparing Mexican food.)

Guy: I love cilantro. It makes everything taste like it’s just been rinsed in a mountain waterfall. Read More »

[Every week, CC and John bring you some of the weirdest, funniest, saddest things he hears on his college campus. Join the Overheard revolution!Leave your own overheard convos in the comments or send ‘em over!]

(At a Starbucks.)

Girl: So this is the only gin joint in town, huh?

Barista: No. This is a Starbucks.

(Two guys on move-out day, carrying cases of beer.)

Guy 1: Man, we’re gonna fill up an entire recycling bin.

RA, poking head out of room: Excuse me?

Guy 2: No, don’t worry, it’s okay. These are full of urine.

(Guy, in a bookstore cafe.)

Guy: Agh, this isn’t iced coffee. This is … nice coffee. And by that I mean not-nice coffee. Read More »

You know the feeling: you wake up in the morning after a long night of getting your drink on and you are thirsty. Like, trekking through a desert for 3 months without a Nalgene thirsty. You crawl out of bed and reach for the first beverage you can get your hands on, be it Powerade, water, or a 2 liter of Diet Coke.

And it feels good goin’ down.

What if I told you there was an even more refreshing alternative? A drink that has the power to heal you and nourish your body. No, it’s not beer – that whole “hair of the dog that bit ya” theory is whack. It’s better than beer.

Though it may taste a bit like it.

It’s….cow urine.

Yes, it’s true. Look out Coke and Pepsi, Gau Jal, or cow water, is coming. The drink, which is made mostly of cow pee pee mixed with herbal supplements, is being touted as a healthy alternative to soft drinks. While it doesn’t sound very appealing (or hygienic), Gau Jal’s creator, Om Prakash, promises that ” it won’t smell like urine and will be tasty too.” Read More »

I’ll never forget the time that I was traveling with a bunch of dudes and found myself faced with a UTI. Having had the nasty infections before, I knew without going to a doctor what, precisely, was going on down there.

And I needed to pee. (But of course I couldn’t).

Being with a bunch of guys, no one understood just what I was going through. In fact, they thought it was really hilarious. And wouldn’t let me get near the bathroom. But while they laughed, my body ached. So I slapped the guy nearest to the bathroom and shoved my way in. Yes, I hit him…and I do not regret it.

Urinary Tract Infections are one of the most painful things that you can experience. They burn. They ache. They make your pee smell foul. They make you feel like you have to urinate constantly, but when you try to go-you can’t!

And if all that isn’t bad enough, they could lead to septicemia, which is a nice way of saying you could lose your limbs. For real. Just ask Brazilian bombshell (and Miss World contestant) Mariana Bridi da Costa. She recently had her hands and feet amputated and it all stemmed from a terrible UTI.

So, yeah, they’re absolutely awful.

Luckily, my years of getting the infection have taught me how to avoid it. If you’re in the market to avoid UTIs (and, trust me you should be), take my advice and follow these tips: Read More »

Tiene una pregunta para Tuffita? Email her at tuffylove@collegecandy.com to be featured in her column, which runs every other Tuesday! She’s bi-weekly (wink, wink.)

Dear Tuffy Luv,

My brother Jeremy & I were bedwetters into our late teens. Jeremy until he was 17 & i until i was 18. Jeremy is 2 years younger than me. Our problem is that we wet (soak) the bed when we drink a little too much alcohol, beer in particular. I have wet in my pants on 2 or 3 occasions on the way home from the pub in addition to wetting the bed on those nights. Have you had any e-mails on this problem, or is there anyone out there that has the same problem that may have a solution to this problem? We do have our own apartment at school so we can have rubber sheets on the bed without anyone finding out about us wetting.

Dear Bedwetter,

Oh, honey. Oh. Honey.

Well, first of all, according to the Mayo Clinic, wetting the bed as an adult ain’t great. It’s called “secondary enuresis” and it could mean a whole slew of other possible problems. For inst, it could be diabetes, or bladder cancer, or a neurological problem, or any other number of big baddies.

In other words, get thee (and the Jerster) to a doctor!!! Immediately!!! Read More »

We all know Amy Winehouse has some problemos. Mostly involving crack, horse tranquilizers and really, really gross hair. But even a crackhead can love designer duds.

So can we blame her when her love for the bottle and her passion for high fashion collide….in the form of vomit splattered all over some super couture dresses…which she returned…without cleaning them?

Um. Ew.

And, yes. Yes we can.

I’ve been there. Too many times. Like the time my friend borrowed a pair of boots, got drunk and peed behind a dumpster…drowning my boots in urine. Or when I went to use my Chi and found chunks of vomit from a roommate’s particularly bad evening. (“Seriously, I couldn’t even get to the toilet. It was totally projectile!”) Or that time I loaned out my favorite t-shirt only to have it returned with some…er…male secretion splattered all over the front.

The point is this: we don’t care what you do in our clothes, just clean that sh*t up. Especially for Harvey Nichols.

Although, on the bright side, at least it was just vomit. Who knows what this girl is capable of?!

[To ask Tuffy Luv a question, email her at tuffy@collegecandy.com and check back here for her response. No question is too big or small or weird or dumb! ASK AND YE SHALL RECEIVE (a response).]

Dear Tuffy Luv,

This is really embarassing, so I hope it’s not weird that I’m asking you.

So over the summer every summer for the last three years I work as a hostess at this restaurant near my house. And every year I’ve been there, there’s been this guy (I’ll call him T) who works there too. I go away to college, but he goes to the junior college nearby so he’s there all year.

Anyway, T and I always flirt all summer and nothing ever really happened (last summer we kissed once but it was at a party and not anything that went anywhere). Except this year, from the first day we saw each other again, it was like BAM–chemistry. So we hooked up a couple of times and it was great.

My problem is, last night, I went over to his place after work and I thought we were just going to hook up like usual, but then–I don’t even know how to say this without being gross, so here it is: he peed on me.

I was totally disgusted, but I was really surprised so I didn’t say anything and we just had sex anyway and then I went home.

What the hell?! Also, have I now given him permission to do it again since I didn’t say anything? Help!!!!!!!!

-I Got Peed On Read More »

Thank the good people over at Scanner for alerting me to this.

Gone are the days of MarioKart, Zelda and NBA Live ‘95. Instead, today’s hottest video game title features people peeing on cats. The newest Wii title in Japan is called Super Pii Pii Brothers. Just insert your Wiimote into the underwear-like harness (included of course) and start pissing the night away.

Your goal: aim for the three toilets on the screen. Kittens and other creatures pop out of the commodes and you earn extra points for dousing them with your stream of urine. You can pee in different locales and environments, but get too much on the floor and you lose…so does the custodian.

I’ve always wanted to know what it’s like to pee standing up, but never enough to want to simulate the experience in a virtual setting with my closest friends and/or family. Call me old school, but whatever happened to Cranium? Too clean?

Super Pii Pii Brothers may seem too ridiculous to be true, but check out the game in action. If you want to play yourself, the game is available in through ThinkGeek.