Avoid the holiday weight gain this year.

2009 is all about the bun.

Kate and Leo reunited at last.

DIY gifts for guys. So cool.

Need a cocktail ring for New Year’s? These are fabulous.

The Real Housewives of Atlanta are comin’ back. Thank you, Santa!

Dartmouth professor discovers the dangers of Facebook.

Gossip is good for ya!

In case you care, Joe Biden got a new puppy.

Need a vacation read? Try one of these great pop culture books.

Women are making strides, actually not strides, leaps and bounds. It would seem that since women won the right to vote in 1920 there wouldn’t be anything left for us to conquer. I mean, that was almost 90 years ago. By now, women should have done everything and have a presence everywhere.

Women have been the first at a lot of things throughout history. Here are just a few of the big moments:

• 1925 Nellie Tayloe Ross became the first woman governor
• 1932 Amelia Earhart became the first woman to fly across the Atlantic
• 1934 Lettie Pate Whitehead became the first woman to serve as director of a major corporation
• 1960 Jacqueline Cochran became the first woman to break the sound barrier
• in 1965 Patsy Takemoto Mink was the first Asian-American to be elected to Congress
• 1972 Sally Jean Priesand was the first woman rabbi in the U.S.
• 1981 Sandra Day O’Connor was the first woman appointed to the Supreme Court
• 1985 Wilma Mankiller was the first woman to became the chief of the Cherokee Nation
• 1990 Dr. Antonia Novello becomes the first Hispanic woman and woman to be U.S. Surgeon General
• 1992 Carol Moseley-Braun is the first African American woman elected to the U.S. Senate….and the list goes on.

However, after almost 90 years since women’s suffrage, is there really that much women haven’t done? Is the glass ceiling still that low? The answer to these questions is, yes. And because the answer is yes, women are still making history and being the first, especially in the past two years.

It was announced today that Ann E. Dunwoody would be the first woman four-star general in the U.S. military. Today, at a ceremony at the Pentagon she will be awarded her fourth star. This is huge! This a huge honor, especially since women weren’t permitted to serve in the military until decades into the twentieth century.

Remember the big story just two years ago that Katie Couric would be the first solo female anchor of a national evening news show, CBS Evening News? I think she is doing great!

Another big event (2007) was when Nancy Pelosi became the first woman Speaker of the House of Representatives. This is one of the top positions in our political system and we have a woman in control!In 2007, Drew Gilpin Faust became the first woman president of Harvard University in the school’s 371-year history. Wow.

Hillary Clinton has been a lot of firsts, the First Lady, the first First Lady to be elected to the U.S. Senate, and this year the first woman to win a presidential primary. She was so close to running our country it was unbelievable!

Sarah Palin, governor of Alaska, was the first woman to run for Vice President on the Republican ticket.

It is hard to fathom that women haven’t done everything, I mean we are all suppose to be equal! I wonder how long it will be until there is nothing left to be the first at?

Halloween used to be a holiday where people dressed up to spook others. Then it turned into a holiday where people dress up to f**k others.  And sometimes it’s a holiday where people dress up to honor others.

This year, why not do all three? Dress up as Sarah Palin!

She scares the crap out of me, my guy friends wanna f**k her, and, somehow, it’s an honor to dress up as this gun toting, beehive wearing, American Vice Presidential hopeful.

[Photo courtesy of Gawker.com]

And I have no idea who won that freaking thing.

Not, I’d like to add, because I was too drunk to see the end of the debate. No, no, no; I watched every last minute. I have no idea who won because neither candidate really threw any major punches.

Biden, presumably afraid to look like a villain, spoke only to the camera the whole time. And Palin just kept saying the same words and doing the same things over and over again: nucULAR, maverick, winking?!

So, I need to know what you think: who won last night’s VP debate?!

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A few weeks ago, the Conventions were full of politician life stories; I was once poor, I’ve had some hard times in my life, I come from a small town, I’m just a hockey mom…blah blah blah blah blaaahhh. These would-be presidents and VP’s spend hours convincing us that they understand what it’s like to have bills, to choose between a full tank of gas and certain grocery items, and to raise a family in today’s trying times.

But here’s my question: once you’ve ascended Politician status, are you still really “one of us”?

Like it or not, in today’s society, you can’t run for a big political office without having a lot of money in your pocket, a lot of important friends, major clout, and usually – a big important degree from a big important school (unless, of course, you’re Palin). You dress in the best clothes, you’ve got an entourage checking and double checking everything you say, and all those speeches you give to the American public? Mostly written by someone else. Oh yeah…and the media stalks you. Every day.

Even if these politicians grew up like some of us, are they really still in touch with what makes up the average American? Is it possible that they can remember what it feels like to walk a mile in Everyman’s shoes?

Even my mom can’t understand what it’s like to be a college student today; how is it possible that John McCain or Joe Biden remembers? Just because Sarah Palin is a mother, does that mean that she speaks for mom’s everywhere? Just because she has boobs, does that mean she immediately knows what it’s like to be a young women in say…Virgina?

Honestly, I wish politicians would stop trying to talk down to us (“I’ve been poor and in trouble like you!“) and start telling us in honest, straightforward ways how they’re going to use their position of supreme power to help us. Obama, Biden, McCain, Palin: You’re not the average American. Use that to your advantage.

What’s your opinion? Are they really like us?

Who Obama Should Have Picked

Flavor Flav

Obama’s shown that he has the quick charisma, intelligent flow and moves to be head MC of famed “conscious” rap crew Wyyte-Houzz and M-RIKA, but even the greatest mic rocker can only work the crowd so much. What Obama needs is a dedicated hype man, a man who can properly rep his skills without grabbing too much of the limelight – a man like former Public Enemy member and all-around gentleman Flavor Flav. Sure, it’s a heavy weight to carry around one’s neck, but Flav is used to it.

Paris Hilton

John McCain gets panned for being “too establishment”, “too Bushie”, and too conservative in general. But McCain was quite the Nostradamus, I think, when he highlighted Paris Hilton as an upcoming power player in the field of American politics. What makes her such a compelling choice? She has absolutely no platform. She’s completely Teflon. What are you going to disagree with? Taking McCain’s lead, I predict a future where President Obama will not only give Hilton the vice presidency but will make the Secretary of Defense a ham sandwich. Have you ever won an argument about nuclear policy with a ham sandwich? Neither have I.

A full-length mirror

Really, would anyone else do a better job? Obama may have to bulk up a bit for his reflective debut, since seeing his skinny butt all the time might give him body image issues, but otherwise a mirror image of Obama would be the perfect veep. He’d be harder to assassinate. He could double-team enemy politicians on the basketball court. He’d even pin down that right-handed constituency that’s been eluding him this whole time. Better yet, American citizens would no longer have to worry that the leader of the free world is a vampire. Unless he is. But better to find out now, instead of over Mr. Putin’s pale, bloodless corpse.

Who McCain Should Have Picked

Sylvester Stallone

McCain needs to get back to his party roots if he wants to win over the breadbasket of America this September. What he needs to realize is that the GOP is really about two things: getting shirtless and killing people with bazookas. Huckabee came close with his endorsement by Chuck Norris, but he’s always wearing those nerdy denim jackets. And honestly, it’s been far too long since Schwarzenegger terminated anything other than fashion sense. Stallone is the only man left for the job, and he’s already had experience taking down those damn Commies.

Any one of his pets

Everyone loves dogs wearing clothes, and as a dog lover, I’m sure McCain wouldn’t be able to resist the opportunity to put one of his adorable mutts in a presidential three-piece — or any of his other pets. And his party would rally behind the choice for sure: they’ve been outdone by the Democrats, who plan to elect the first black president. They’re trying to one-up that by electing the first woman vice president – but why stop there? Why not go with the first ferret vice president?

My grandfather, who is a realtor

My grandfather knows a lot about houses. He buys houses, and he sells houses. He doesn’t really have any other qualifications for being the vice president, I guess, although he does read the Wall Street Journal. But you know what? McCain has all the president stuff covered. But what about his houses? We all know that McCain said he “couldn’t remember” how many houses he had – but we haven’t really thought about this in detail. What if he has no houses? That’s terrible! If he were the vice president, my grandfather could help McCain buy a house to live in. That would be his Vice Presidential Promise, and he makes good promises.

[Stallone-vision courtesy of artfiles.art.com]

As I continue to try and wrap my head around Sarah Palin, the GOP’s newest Vice Presidential pick (“a woman making strides toward the white house, good!”, “a woman who thinks the government has the right to tell her what her reproductive rights are, bad!”), a few wayward comments flying around the internet and media have gotten me really confused.  According to sources, Palin is on record stating that global warming is not man made, and that polar bears aren’t endangered

…What?

“A changing environment will affect Alaska more than any other state, because of our location.” Palin stated as early as a few weeks ago to a conservative magazine for it’s September issue. “I’m not one though who would attribute it to being man-made.”

As a moderate liberal, I can often support Republicans and Independents, as long as I believe their brain is in the right place. The thing is…denying humans have anything to do with global warming, and working to keep polar bears off the endangered list goes beyond politics and veers into …well…complete and utter wrongness.

“The state of Alaska will sue to challenge the recent listing of polar bears as a threatened species, Gov. Sarah Palin announced. She and other Alaska elected officials fear a listing will cripple oil and gas development in prime polar bear habitat off the state’s northern and northwestern coasts.”

“Palin argued that there is not enough evidence to support a listing. Polar bears are well-managed and their population has dramatically increased over 30 years as a result of conservation, she said.”

Alaskan oil is more important than protecting wildlife?  Wildlife that has met the unfortunate conclusion time and time  and time again of drastic decrease or even full extinction in the next 50 years?

How is McCain and crew (not to mention Palin herself) going to twist her statements into sounding even remotely with the times?  You know who else thinks global warming is propaganda, and could give a rat’s ass about the polar bears?  My next door neighbor.  Who’s 85.  And who thinks the birds on the telephone wires are communicating directly with NASA.

Even though I’m proud of the fact that old white dudes are finally taking women seriously, I’ve been wary of Plain from the beginning, and this new information has done nothing to assuage my fears. Palin may be a powerful woman, but she ain’t no Hillary, and she certainly ain’t no environmentalist.

Heidism #1: She’s killing NYC one bar at a time

Phelps has an Entourage

Meet the cast of the new 90210 (none of which are nearly as hot as Luke “steal my heart” Perry)

Asking her out via Facebook status

Heidism #2: Joel McHale continues to be my comedy lover

Can your dude take the tampon challenge?

Reasons not to have sex

Miss Obama’s speech last night?  Read it here

Heidism #3: The only McCain VP choice that would have gotten MORE press than Palin

OMG I just watched a Panda GIVE BIRTH

These guys are NOT WELCOME in my bed

Celebs at the DNC

Once thought a longshot, Republican Alaskan Senator Sarah Palin is now on a plane to potentially stand at McCain’s side. Also leavin’ on a jetplane is Mass’s Mormon Mitt Romney. Ohhhhhhh the tension is killing me, but we have received some great insights from interns that we know who work at some real publications.

If Obama had tapped (politically speaking) Hillary Clinton, Mitt Romney would be the VP bid to try and match her fund-raising firepower. Since Joe Biden is in, the Republicans can now pick a female VP and look (and this is a direct quote), “progressive in the ever-changing political landscape where all citizens have equal representation and a global voice.” Gosh, I wish I could write pretty like that.

Who do you want (politically speaking of course)?

Either way, at about noon, we should be hearing who is on the ‘Straight Talk Express’ and who is flying home in coach. I can only wonder where Bill Richardson disappeared to in all of this clamor, but I guess his work in Homeland Security and the fact that 85% of Americans don’t feel any safer kinda’ worked against him. Sorry Bill.

Everyone is so busy talking about a Hillary Clinton VP spot they seem to be forgetting that there are a lot of other great contenders out there who could be Barack Obama’s number two. Considering how nasty the nomination fight got, it’s not hard to imagine a situation in which Obama would pick one of these qualified party members above his ex-nemesis. Check out these top three VP candidates:

Kathleen Sebelius, Governor of Kansas – Coming out of an eight-year run in the Kansas House of Representatives, Sebelius was elected the state’s Insurance Commissioner and rattled the status quo when she refused to take campaign contributions from insurers. She is currently serving her second term as Kansas Governor. Sebelius says she is personally pro-life, but supports abortion rights; she opposed capitol punishment; and as governor she has made education and the environment her top priorities. She’s a great candidate because she can help lure back the women voters who say they won’t vote Democratic now that Hillary is out.

How you know her: If you happened to watch the Democrat’s response to this year’s State of the Union you saw Sebelius speak and, by gosh, is she boring!

Bill Richardson, Governor of New Mexico – With a resume as long as this guy’s it’s no surprise his name as been mentioned in the VP chatter. He has served as an Ambassador to the United Nations, a U.S. Representative, and as Secretary of Energy to President Bill Clinton. As an Ambassador he represented the US in UN talks between Israel and Palestine, so he’s got John McCain beat when it comes to international relations and experience. He’s also a great candidate to help bring Latino voters to Obama’s side, a group who overwhelmingly voted for Hillary.

How you know him: He was hoping to be president. He ran against Obama and Hillary,but was overshadowed and dropped out in January.

Wesley Clark, retired Army General – Just because he was a big Hillary Clinton supporter during the primaries doesn’t mean he’s out of the running. His resume is even longer than Richardson’s. Going back to the very beginning–– Clark was a valedictorian at West Point and a Rhodes Scholar, he served in the Army and in the Department of Defense for thirty-four years, and he commanded the Allied Forces in Kosovo while he was Supreme Allied Commander Europe (just one title below Ninja-Pirate-Superhero-Man). He outranks John McCain, by a lot, and as someone who grew up in, and currently resides in, Arkansas, he can help get some of the white Southern vote.

How you know him: He participated in the 2004 primary but dropped out and endorsed John Kerry.

Personally I’d like to see Stephen T. Colbert, of South Carolina, get the nomination. But I guess that’s why I don’t work for the DNC…

[all images from wikipedia]