What the hell is a 1099?!

Last week was a pretty big week for me in grown-up world. Not only did I learn a valuable lesson about why you don’t take your shoes off in bars, but I also filed out my taxes all by myself. And by all by myself, I mean with the help of an accountant who probably now thinks that my IQ borders somewhere in the high twenties.

Up until last week I thought filing taxes was as simple as creating a fake Facebook profile to stalk exes (okay…one-night stands). I fill out a slip of paper with my name, social security number, yearly earnings, bra size, favorite movies, and my vote on what color M&Ms should include next. Bada bing,  bada boom, I’m a functioning member of society.

But no. This process makes writing a 19 page paper on the causes and effects of “I only smoke when I’m drunk” look incredibly easy. First I had to fill out a million pieces of paper, then I had to track down W2′s, W4′s, 1099s, 13 Chinese take-out menus, and Colt 45s. And it’s not like I stored them all in one place.  Why would I ever do anything that would make my life less of a daily episode of Real World/Road Rules Challenge. Some were at home in Florida, some were at my grandmother’s NYC apt., some were buried 6 feet under cement in a “what? We’re making a graduation time capsule and I can choose one thing to put in? Okay, here’s some official, legal, looking documents that I doubt I’ll ever need” time capsule on the Syracuse campus. Read More »

[College kids are notorious for being poor. And why shouldn’t we be? We take out student loans to pay for private universities, can barely balance a part-time job with our full-time courseload, and the only “balance” we’re familiar with refers to the number of points left on our dining hall cards. Oh, did I mention many of us tend to splurge every extra penny on PBR’s at the campus bar?

If you disagree with everything I just said, you probably don’t need this column. But if you’re nodding along because you’re officially an adult and still don’t know how to manage your money, then you might want to pay attention every week, because I’m going to (try to) get you through this, and make you a successful saver and a wise spender.]

Congratulations! You’ve got a job! You can start making money… and the government can start taking money from you!

On your first day at a new job, you’re going to get slapped with a stack of paperwork: company handbook, sexual harrassment awareness statement, and, of course, the W2 form. How many of you have snuck into the bathroom to call your parents and ask them WTF to write in this form? Yeah, me too. Here is everything you need to know:

The W2 determines how much money in taxes will be taken out of your paycheck. Typically, dependents have the most taken out, independents are somewhere in the middle, and people who have dependents have the least. Usually, college students are either “dependents” or sole “independents.” If your parents claim you as their dependent, they are basically telling the gov’t that they support you; therefore, the gov’t sees your wages as extra cash, and will take more money from you. If you are independent with no one to provide you, the tax form says (in layman’s terms) that you are responsible for living expenses (rent, utilities, tuition, etc), but don’t have to spend your money on anything else. Read More »