Why does it matter how many people someone has had sex with?

In the world of journalism, that, my friends, is called a question lede. I’m supposed to spend the rest of this article trying to answer that question, but honestly I can’t make any promises. You see, that question has been in my mind for a while now, and I can’t seem to figure it out. Why do people care about someone’s “magic number,” and why is a person’s morality level judged by how many sexual partners they’ve had?

Historically speaking, it’s understandable why chastity and virginity were important. Without any kind of protection, getting pregnant or catching a disease was very much a reality. Virginity was maintained until marriage because no one wanted to catch a disease from their future spouse. Which is fair enough, really.

But those reasons are mainly invalid in modern times; we have condoms to save us from diseased genitals and unwanted fetuses. So long as sex is protected, it really shouldn’t matter how many people have been involved. Sex with multiple partners (not necessarily at the same time…) is often frowned upon as being immoral and looked at as being a “sin of the flesh” – but what is so immoral about it? No one is getting hurt and no one is being damaged. So long as the people involved are consenting and protected, there really is nothing immoral about it. Read More »

I don’t know if any of you have noticed, but there seems to be a nearly tangible divide between certain groups of college students. There’s the involved and the uninvolved, the passionate and the ones who are just trying to appease their parents, the drinkers and the non-drinkers, and the sexually active and those who are waiting until marriage.

While I respect a person’s right to choose when they are going to have sex, I’ve realized something lately: it’s a really bad idea to wait until marriage. The thought itself is lovely – being penetrated for the first time on your wedding night, surrounded by candles, with the man who is wearing a ring on his left finger that matches yours –  but logically speaking, it’s not quite that simple, and definitely not that practical. It’s also incredibly naive.

First off, something a lot of people are too afraid (or too “nice”) to admit – sex is a huge part of a relationship. I’m not trying to patronize virgins, but maybe when you haven’t had sex yet, you don’t realize how true that is. Being intimate and sharing those vulnerable naked moments are important for getting to know someone as a whole. Who someone is as a person and who they are sexually can sometimes be completely different. Would you really want to marry someone who has an entire part of their being that remains a mystery to you? Read More »

You got a question for Tuffy?! Email her at TuffyLuv@collegecandy.com and maybe get yourself some answers!!

Dear Tuffy Luv,

My boyfriend and I constantly fight about sex. He’s my first boyfriend and I was a virgin when we met. After about a month of being together we had sex and in the five months we’ve been together we’ve only done it a few times. He wants it but whenever we do it, it still hurts a little and I don’t really feel anything. It makes me feel empty inside and I find myself wondering what all the hype is about.

We’ve tried taking breaks and now I feel that I’m truly ready so we tried again and same thing. He says we just need to do it more so that it gets better and that our love for each other should be enough to make it feel good but for me it feels better when we make out. I’ve tried getting him to understand and thought maybe we should wait a little longer before trying again because I also think he just wants it a lot (right before our first time he told me I’d have sex with him if I loved him and like an idiot I did it). And whenever we hang out it usually leads to something physical.

Am I getting played? I never thought I’d be one of those naive girls who lets a guy take advantage of her. I’m wondering if maybe I should break up with him. I do love him but we constantly argue about sex and I’m making all these sacrifices to be with him but when it comes time for him to wait to have sex he’ll do it but he’s complaining about it. Should I break up with him? Are there any other options?

– That Stupid Girl

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Sometimes I love a band so much, I just sit and wait for them to come out with something new. Well, I don’t literally sit and wait, but I do get really excited when I know a release date is near. And this week, my long and painful wait was over.

Well, for two of the three bands, at least.

Had I actually sat around and waited for Third Eye Blind to release a new album – yes, it took them six years – I would probably be dead by now. And even though it wasn’t an eternity, waiting for Mute Math felt like forever. I was thisclose to completely wearing out their original album. Now, I wasn’t exactly falling off my seat waiting for Cascada to release something new, but they did I listened and enjoyed it nonetheless.

They say distance makes the heart grow fonder and I’m pretty sure that can be said for this week’s new releases: Read More »

Virginity: you either have it, lost it, or in the process of giving it away. (Editor’s Note: If that’s they case, maybe you should focus more on that and stop surfing the internet. You don’t want to offend your partner.) And for most, it is as valued as a relatively sacred part of us – one that you don’t just give to anyone. Take Natalie Dylan, for instance. She ain’t givin it up to any ol boy – she’s givin it up to the highest bidder. That’s right, this lovely lady is in the process of auctioning off her virginity online for upwards of 3.8 million dollars! Let’s be honest – that’s enough money to make any girl twice about keeping her V card. But think a third time, and most of us in our right mind would never do such a thing. But why?

Why is our purity worth an incalculable amount when people used to sell their souls on Ebay for twenty bucks? (I swear it’s true, Ebay started prohibiting it a few years ago).

Many of my close friends are virgins, but they all have varying reasons for their decision. My friend Jenny, for instance, decided not to have sex until she graduated high school. She wanted to wait out of respect for her parents, in addition to various religious reasons. Once she got to college, however, she found that those reasons weren’t as important to her as they once were. Read More »

Hollywood is filled with some of the best looking men we’ve ever seen. But, it’s one thing to be good looking and quite another to have the ability to make an audience laugh. Having the whole package – even in Hollywood – seems like a rarity. While Will Ferrell can make me go into a fit of laughter like no other, as soon as that shirt comes off, (which it seems to do, in every movie) the whole attraction factor goes bye bye. Here are some guys who can make me laugh and break a sweat looking at them:

1. Ryan Reynolds. Now, besides the fact that he is off the market (engaged to Scarlet Jo!), this man is seriously adorable – and funny. Did you not see his abs in the hilarious movie Waiting? Or perhaps catch a glimpse of that killer smile?

2. Dane Cook. Not only is his stand up hilarious, but he’s got that dreamy guy-next-door-you’d-like-to-pounce-on look. Girls dig it. Guys dig it. I sure as heck do.

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