Yeah, I get it, nations get together and compete to show that their differences aren’t all that big after all, blah blah blah. The truth of the matter is, sports has never brought nations together. Maybe they can put their differences aside for a few minutes for the sake of the cameras (and to try for that gold medal), but the moment they leave the venue, the world is back to the way it was.

But, hey, I do like dessert. So, to honor the Beijing Olympics in the only way I know how, I propose a making delicious Chinese dessert: deep fried watermelon. Yes, it’s fried, but, hey, at least it’s fruit!

Happy sporting!

What You’ll Need

1 10 pound watermelon

2 beaten egg whites

11 tablespoons of flour

7 tablespoons of cornstarch

3 cups of vegetable oil

How To Do It

(1) Slice the watermelon in half.

(2) Scoop the pulp out and remove all seeds.

(3) Carefully cut the pulp into the shapes of your choice. (Each one will be a serving.)

(4) Coat the shapes with flour.

(5) In a bowl, mix the cornstarch, the egg whites, and a splash of water. This is the batter.

(6) Heat the oil until it’s about 250 degrees F. Be very careful!!!

(7) Dip each watermelon piece into the batter and then carefully place each piece into the boiling oil.

(8) Let it fry until the coating of the watermelon is firm. Then turn the heat off and deep fry until the watermelon coating is a light brown color.

(9) CAREFULLY drain the watermelon.

(10) Sprinkle it with sugar, let cool, and enjoy!

[Image courtesy of www.sde.ct.gov]

Looks like Ms. Spears has taken her pap bf (with the narly chin hair) back. It’s so cute! They both love hats!

I’d like to see someone try this and come out unscathed.

The more men that look like Zach Braff, the better chance I have of falling in love.

If your man is suddenly eating lots of watermelon, it’s probably not because he thinks its tasty.

A faster way to eat fast food.

Because this comes as a shock to….nobody.

Alternative breakfast ideas (that aren’t 8 gillion calories)

Talk about sibling rivalry….

This game is the sh*t! But more addicting than crack: you’ve been warned.

Maxim sums up basically the best gifts of all time for your Dad/Grad.

Charlie Sheen Marries an “Easy” Woman. Obviously.

I feel so bad for this guy. But not bad enough to find his situation completely hilarious.

Watermelon Bombe: It’s not what you’re thinking.

But This Is! Cheers!

Audrina from back in the day. Hot or Not?

Jennifer Aniston is a pothead?! Am I the last person on earth to realize this?!

You don’t have to be rich and white to like SATC...just don’t expect to see yourself represented.

Superhero Fashion: kinda flamboyant. Oh, wait, did I say kinda? I meant VERY.

I know I’m not alone here, so lets just kick the bad habits of self-sabotage!! Stop staring at yourself in the mirror with self loathing and use these helpful tips to make the transition from winter hibernation to summer rejuvenation (I don’t know that’s all that rhymed?) easy! AND WEAR SUNSCREEN!

*Stop grocery shopping on without a LIST! If you make a list of healthy options it will be MUCH easier to stick away from buying Haagen Daaz on a hot summer’s day. Watermelon will have to suffice.

*Make your own smoothies. Believe me, I love Jamba Juice just as much as the next girl, but hidden calories make “healthy” smoothies not so healthy.

*HAVE A POPSICLE!! Low fat fudgicles only have 50 calories!

*Find a workout partner and do things outside; ride a bike, play volleyball, tennis, swim. Make your workout plan feel like you aren’t working at all by making it a social activity.

*Eat more protein. Ok fine, this secret is nothing new but it IS important. I’ve been eating hard-boiled eggs like they’re going out of style. You’ll stay full longer, burn more calories, and it strengthens your immune system.

*Carry snacks with you so you don’t feel like binging on Cheetos in the middle of the day. Kashi granola bars, almonds, fruit, dried mangos (so good), or measured whole wheat crackers and string cheese.

*Do “work-out” blasts between commercials. Want to veg out and watch movies all day? Cool…but to keep burning calories, get up and do some jumping jacks, sit-ups, jog in place…whatever. You may look like a total spaz, but you’ll feel better and as a result, you’ll look better!

[Any other summer body tips? We need to know!]

Even though it won’t get chilly for another few weeks, the mere promise of shorter days, schoolwork, and winter hats constantly ruining perfectly styled hair is enough to make me a little depressed…at least until fall fashions go on sale.

For many of us, Labor Day is a last hurrah; our last 24 hours to wear white pants (which perhaps some of us shouldn’t be wearing in the first place?), last day to barbeque without standing by the grill in a jacket, and last 3-day weekend for a while.

It’s also a party, whether we’re partying with friends or throwing our own personal celebration that consists of doing absolutely nothing—and enjoying the hell out of it.

In honor of Goodbye-To-Bathing-Suits weekend, I’ve found the perfect cocktail to commemorate a summer gone by.

Frozen Watermelon Margarita

* 2 1/2 cups seedless (or seeded) watermelon, cut into 1-inch cubes

* 3 tablespoons freshly squeezed lime juice

* 4 ounces tequila

* 2 ounces orange flavored liqueur

* 1 3/4 cups ice

* lime wheel or watermelon wedge (for garnish)

Stuff all ingredients into a blender and puree until smooth. If desired, add a bit of sugar to the rim of each glass before garnishing with a lime wheel or a watermelon wedge. Serve immediately.

…And remember, not only are the cops out in full force this holiday weekend, but ruining a good time by getting yourself wasted is a lame way to end any celebration. Just ask Andy Dick.

Have I got the perfect girly cocktail for those 4th of July needs. It’s chilled, fruity, and when served with blueberries and a hint of whipped cream, it’s patriotic.

Watermelon Mellow

• 8 cups diced watermelon (about 1/2 of a small watermelon, plus slices for garnish)

• 8 ounces lemon vodka (make sure it’s chilled)

• 7 ounces simple syrup*

• 1 can coconut juice

• 1 lemon

Put your diced watermelon in the freezer for 30 minutes. Afterwards, put all the ingredients in a blender and mix until smooth. Squeeze some fresh lemon into the mixture, and serve very cold in a chilled glass. Feel free to garnish with watermelon, a few blueberries, and the slightest hint of whipped cream.

(*simple syrup is easy to make. Take 1 cup sugar and 1 cup of water and pour both into a small saucepan. Cook on low heat and stir until the sugar dissolves.)

Have a great 4th, and always remember to drink responsibly. Being wasted while fireworks are booming overhead can be very disorienting…and nobody likes a confused drunk.