Dressing for a wedding is just like dressing up for any other special occasion, but there are a few rules to wedding fashion. The first and most important of these: don’t upstage the bride. This means no white, of course, but also nothing too flashy or revealing. And if the ceremony is in a house of worship, keep your shoulders and cleavage covered up out of respect. But that doesn’t mean what you wear has to be boring!

In fact, summertime wedding fashion is all about having fun — bright colors and playful patterns fit are perfect for these kind of occasions. And the best part? You don’t have to spend a lot to look great at any wedding you attend this summer — all of these dresses would be perfect for a summer wedding, and they’re only $20 or less each!

Me. Crying. For the entire scene.

Call me a sap all you want, but there were tears this week. Real ones.

First they were tears of frustration and anger – crying because the scene that I have been anticipating for weeks, when Rufus and Lily finally discover that Scott is their son, was squished into some 15 second clip where Georgina walks by and breezily mentions it. But then it became tears of happiness as Rufus professed his undying love to Lily and told her to stop getting cold feet and just move them down the aisle already. And then the tears turned to even more happiness and love when Scott and his parents hugged and cried and proved that children given up by their parents at birth really can re-integrate into their previous families twenty years later.

Sounds kind of like a Lifetime movie, but I’ll work with it. Box of tissues in hand.

Sidetrack to Georgina for a second: The only word for her this episode is CREEPY. And I’m not just talking about her whole I-love-Dan-and-I’ll-do-whatever-it-takes-to-get-him-back thing. Is she getting paler and more wide-eyed every episode? I know it suits her overly-involved obsessive personality, but come on, makeup artists – ever hear of bronzer? Maybe if she started reading CollegeCandy she’d learn some much needed makeup tips and how to spot a guy who isn’t into her so she can move on instead of trying to ruin things for him and his superstar, hot, Hilary Duff actress girlfriend. But more importantly, she’d learn a few things about bronzer.

Now back to Rufus and Lily: After tip-toeing around each other, they finally tie the knot at the Brooklyn loft (insert more tears that their perfect garden with perfect flowers in perfect weather didn’t get to happen). Jenny made the gorgeous wedding gown, Serena wore some fabulous frock that made her boobs look ridic and Jenny wore….my grandma’s moo moo. I wept for her stylists.

We all know that no big event on the Upper East Side could ever run smoothly and a Lily Bass wedding is no exception. Even before the big “this is your son” debacle, we finally learned that Carter Basin scammed the Buckleys into paying off his debts. But last we saw, his gorgeous body and that face-so-hot-it-makes-me-tear-up were sandwiched between two very large Texans and about to be used to pay back his bookie fees. Apparently Southern families never forget. And apparently those Southern girls will do anything to help their families, and that includes using one poor Nate Archibald. Poor kid, he really thought that Brie was falling for him. He should have listened to the astonishing, gorgeous, please-let-me-be her Blair Waldorf.

“No girl is that nice.”

And no other girl would get an amazing Chuck Bass massage, a moment I watched with tears in my eyes since my boyfriend doesn’t take cross-continental massage technique lessons.

Well, at least I’m not Carter Basin. Homeboy’s in for some serious pain. We’ll just have to see how it all goes down next week. Until then….

You know you love them.
XOXO.
GGR.
(Gossip Girl Recapper)

I have never really liked meat. The idea of a bloody (or even well-done) steak with neatly criss-crossed grill marks on my plate has never been appealing to me, and I have basically limited my carnivorous intake to the occasional chicken breast. My boyfriend is a vegetarian, and I can go for long stretches of time without eating any meat at all. So why am I not a vegetarian, too, already?

Here are the reasons I’ve come up with (while sitting over a bowl of my mom’s famous beef stew):

- It still doesn’t seem to be quite accepted. If you’re invited to dinner at someone’s house or invited to a wedding or some other bash, it’s assumed that you eat meat. If you don’t, you either have to make everyone feel bad by arranging for a special plate or you have to forage for roots and berries among the side dishes.

- Some of my favorite dishes from childhood have meat in them. Sure, I don’t eat them now, but when I go home and my mom makes them, it’s sweet (and they’re still delicious). Knowing I couldn’t eat those anymore would kind of depress me. Wait, who am I kidding? It would totally depress me.

- One of my goals is to travel around the world, and I don’t want to have to limit myself in any way when I do that. Especially when it comes to eating local fare that may or may not come from an animal.

- BACON. Need I say more?

Okay, but lately I’ve been giving these things more serious thought. World Vegetarian Day – which is happening right now! – is arriving at a perfect time for me, because I’m finally considering just making the plunge and going full veg. After all, none of my reasons from above are really relevant on an everyday basis, and here’s something else: fake meat is surprisingly good. Yeah, that’s right. I said it. That Morningstar bacon will never come from a real hog and will always look and taste just a little bit off, but honestly, it’s pretty damn good. Good enough for me to give up the real stuff.

Plus, protein is everywhere. I didn’t realize I ate so much protein on an everyday basis until I started tracking my food with The Daily Plate and saw that I usually get about 250% to 300% of my daily protein requirement – all without eating meat. These foods are just bursting with protein and I happen to eat them (in large quantities) on a daily basis:

Eggs
Milk
Soy milk
Cottage cheese
Regular cheese
Yogurt
Peanut butter
Nuts
Lentils

I don’t need some artery clogging meat to survive. I can live meat-free and still get everything I need. So here it is: October 1, 2009 just might be the onset of my own personal journey toward vegetarianism.

PETA, call me! I wanna do one of those naked ads!

What do you vegetarians think? Is it easy? What made you decide? Why should I do it?

A narrative about four friends at Smith College, an all women’s college in Massachusetts (famous alumnae include Gloria Steinem, Julia Child, Sylvia Plath, Betty Friedan…just to name a few), Sullivan captures the essence of what it means to make friends in the richest sense of the word, while chronicling life on campus and post-graduation adulthood.

Each character is truly distinct, making the novel easy to identify with. Think the Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants, except more adult. Sally, Celia, Bree, and April are four very different women, but their individuality weaves together beautifully, showing that sisterhood looks past Sally’s love for Lily Pulitzer, Celia’s conservative-yet-wild side, Bree’s Southern Belle charm, and April’s radical feminism to form a life-long bond, even if the girls couldn’t be more uncommon from each other.

Sullivan, alumnae of Smith herself, paints the all women’s atmosphere just as it should be, a unique and tradition-filled roller coaster of emotions. Giving an accurate glimpse of what it means to be a young woman at a college without men, Sullivan does not degrade Smith or the single-sex setting, but instead lifts it up and showcases it in a light that most do not see when they hear “all women.”

Honest and captivating, Commencement tackles the strength it takes to maintain a friendship, especially once Sally, Celia, Bree, and April are on their own as adults. Not sugarcoating the hardships of rape, first loves, untraditional ideals, and fighting for what you believe in, Sullivan doesn’t leave anything out (seriously, topics from marriage to sex-trafficking appear) – showing how hard it can be to grow up, and how hard it can be for young women today.

With rave reviews from everyone from Gloria Steinem to People magazine, and to Entertainment Weekly, Sullivan’s first novel hit home and gave her a place in popular writing today. Whether you are in college now or on your own post-grad, this novel will tug at your heart strings with memories of your own experience and undoubtedly, you will find yourself in the pages of this page turner.

Some of you may protest, “but I like weddings!  They’re fun!”  Does sitting around for hours with pit stains in a dress you hate in the company of people you barely know with a severe case of sobriety sound fun to you?  There are obviously some exceptions (especially if you are the bride or you’re just the “+1″ on an invitation), but here are the 10 things we hate about weddings:

1). Bridesmaid Dresses – This is probably the worst thing on our list and definitely the one with the worst reputation (see uglydress.com and the hundreds of other sites dedicated to the fashion offenses committed in the “bridesmaid dress” genre).  A summer wedding could only improve an ugly dress you didn’t want to wear – the pit stains will totally distract people from that pink poofy thing around your hips.

2). Weird Relatives – Seriously, where did those guys come from?  I’ll bet you never knew that your Uncle Jed (Uncle Who??) from Sweden was a professional turnip juggler.  He’s just dying to tell you all about his most  recent competition, too.

3). Inadequate Seating – Wooden chairs and pews are so not comfortable, especially when you’re forced to watch something akin to My Big Redneck Wedding play out in front of your eyes (or, even worse, Bridezillas).  Let’s get some couches up in here, or at least a cushion (at the very least, you could use the excessive amount of tulle in your ugly bridesmaid dress as a make-shift cushion).

4). The Lack of Alcohol – Unfortunately, not all weddings include the magical words “open bar.”  Some of them are even dry weddings (gasp!).  Seriously, if you’re gonna make us sit next to your creepy cousin at the singles table, then you better be handing out the bottles of wine like candy.

5). The Bride – We love her, we want to be her (maybe), but we also want to kill her.  For some reason, once a girl gets a ring on her finger, it’s like getting permission to regress to when you were a toddler and were spoiled by everyone.  Sorry, but if you’re not two years old, you just can’t rock a temper tantrum.

6). Ugly Groomsmen – Even the worst wedding can be saved by a couple pieces of eye candy in tuxes…but nothing ruins a summer wedding faster than an uggo in a sweat-stained tux.  Especially if you’re a bridesmaid.  Especially if you’re a single bridesmaid.

7). Children – Kind of like a spastic bride, if you put a kid in a pretty dress, it’s pretty much a free pass for any and all misbehavin’.  Don’t get me wrong, I’m kinda jealous that they get to take their shoes off and run around screaming in their dress clothes.  However, my jealousy is buried by my displeasure at being seated at the singles table with them (or at the end of the head table, stuck with the job of babysitting the flower girl).

8). The Chicken Dance – Just…no.  No one can look good doing this.  It’s not fun.  It’s not cute.  Stop the madness.

9). Bridesmaid Drama – If you’re lucky enough to be a part of the wedding party, then you get special privileges that other guests do not…such as bridesmaid drama.  Nothing kills an evening like trying to control a cat fight between the bride and her sister.  Trust me, you do not want to get caught up in that.

10). The Sheer Numbers – Once you get to a certain age, you start getting more and more of those little lacy  invitations in the mail (particularly in the summer).  As if one wasn’t enough!  You better invest in a flask and an amazing LBD right now.

[I’ll be the first to admit that I’m not the epitome of prim and proper- heck, who really is nowadays? But looking around at the misguided youths of today *ahem drinking buddies*, I’m starting to think that Miss Manners might have been onto something.

While you may never need to know how to greet a duke or how to tell which fork is REALLY the oyster fork, knowing how to deal with people whom owe you money, how much to tip, and how to address the ever annoying licorice-in-teeth conundrum without being rude might actually come in handy in the real world. I'm not trying to be your mother - oh goodness, no - I'm just here to help you out of those little etiquette dilemmas. So here goes: a quick lesson in etiquette. The sh*t you might actually need to know]

One of my oldest childhood friends is getting married this Saturday and, quite frankly, I am horrified by the thought of attending his wedding. Not that I have anything against the lovebirds; on the contrary, I’m glad he’s happy. It’s just, well… I never know how to act at weddings. There are just too many unspoken rules, too many unanswered questions: What do I wear? Black? White? Should I go casual or dressy? What do I bring? Who do I bring? Can I bring someone? And so on.

It’s enough to keep you from going to the blasted wedding at all. Well, I’m here to speak those rules and answer those questions. Buckle up my lovelies…

Dress code:
Can I wear white? NO! Never, ever wear white to a wedding.

What about black? Yes, black is perfectly acceptable at weddings. In fact, most people do. As long as you keep from looking like part of a funeral procession, you should be fine.

How revealing can I get? Well, the way my book put it, “Don’t dress like you’re there to sell anything - Tupperware, insurance or yourself,” and I think that’s pretty darn good advice. Also if the ceremony happens to be in a place of worship, remember to keep yourself decent: spaghetti straps and tube tops should be covered up with a sweater/shawl.

Overdressed or Underdressed? When in doubt, always go for the overdressed. No one will say anything if you tell them that you just came from a really fancy party/lunch/meeting/whatever. However, if everyone is standing around sipping champagne and eating caviar in cocktail dresses and you roll in wearing jeans, expect a couple of glares.

The deal on dates:
Can I bring one? Well, it depends what your invite says. If the invitation names both you and your significant other, then he/she is allowed to come. If the invitation bears your name + “guest,” then you’re welcome to bring anyone, from your dorky lab partner to that hottie bartender you’ve been drooling over. If the invitation says your name and your name only, then it’s non-negotiable. The couple is inviting you alone and unless it’s absolutely crucial for you to bring a guest (and this also depends on how close you are to the couple to begin with), then don’t bother asking. This will put them in the awkward predicament of rejecting you flat out.

Do I HAVE to bring one? Nope. Even if your invite allows it but you don’t want to bring the guy you’ve just started dating or you can’t find a date, you don’t have to bring anyone. Plus, it’s more fun flying solo anyway – you don’t have to worry about “babysitting” the new guy or introducing him to all your friends. And if you’re single, even better! What better way to meet guys than at a wedding? They already know some of the people you know and they’re less likely to be serial killers or drug dealers. Maybe you’ll even score with a couple of hot wedding crashers a la Owen Wilson (a girl can dream!).

Your presents will be your gift (Ha!):
What the hell do I give them? I remember how my mother used to freak out whenever she’d have to find her best-friend’s-half-brother’s–second-cousin’s-uncle’s-daughter a gift. I also remember telling her, “That’s why God made wedding registries.” But honestly, the wedding registry is definitely a win-win solution. Basically, the couple makes a wish-list of everything they need/want to start their new life together and it’s up to everyone else to cough up the gifts. This helps the couple because they get exactly what they ask for and it keeps you from showing up with a set of shot glasses (apparently married people don’t use those as often as we do….).

What if the couple isn’t registered anywhere? Well, then you’re screwed, aren’t you? Kidding. If the couple’s not registered, play it safe with a gift certificate or a check written out to the couple. The amount should be equal in value to how much they mean to you (seriously) or how well you know them, whatever comes out to more.

Is straight up cash acceptable? I’m not going to lie, I don’t see why not. I’ve done the “wads of bills (wads… who am I kidding?) in an envelope” before. Some couples even go around with money bags strictly for this purpose. It’s okay in most cases, but keep in mind who your recipients are – while some people will lap up the bills faster than a stripper during a lap dance, others might see this as a sign of disrespect.

Drinks in my cup:
Can I drink? It depends. Are you legal? Do your hosts care if you drink illegally? Just know that if you’re going to drink, try not to get piss drunk at someone else’s wedding. It’s rude, especially if you oh-so-classily get wasted before the ceremony. Or worse.. during!

Does open bar mean that I don’t have to tip? No.

So that’s all folks. And just in case you guys were wondering: I’m totally open to cash at my wedding (whenever that may be). Remember that.

And on a side note: I’d love to get your opinions on this feature. What do you guys want to hear about? Are there any topics you want to see featured on next week’s Miss Manners? Sound off in the Comments section!

So, congratulations! Have you picked a date? Done the dress shopping? Gone cake tasting? Picked the esteemed members of your bridal party? Great! So if we could take a minute to shift the focus over to me? Yeah.

You’re freaking me out.

Early, early, early 20s are not a time when the general “you” should be worried about marriage, especially when I can’t even decide whether I want to go to grad school or work or what. And yet, you’re kind of making me think I should be worried. I mean, isn’t everybody in the dating game right now, yourselves excluded? Aren’t most pople our age single? Don’t you know that marriage is supposed to be forever and divorces are really expensive and, frankly, so are weddings (especially on the east coast—eep)?

And also, are you going to get all judgy all of a sudden? I’m still the delinquent “single friend” who can’t land a boyfriend for more than a couple months at a shot, I have no life direction as yet (but we’re hoping, any day now, for an epiphany)… Are you going to keep giving me that “I’m judging you without trying to seem that way” look while continually asking how my dating life is going? Because I can tell you already: I’m really not going to meet anyone anytime soon. I’m pretty sure I’m bad at the dating game and I probably can’t even find someone to commit to being my date at your wedding to keep me from looking as alone and pathetic as I apparently am…

No, it’s fine. I’ll be at the bar, don’t worry about it.

Wait; you are having an open bar, aren’t you?

I’m sure it’s not your intention to make me feel bad here, and your wedding is really just about the two of you and eternal love and sunshine and daisies and what-not. But until this whole engagement situation I really thought I was just normal and average for a twenty-something. But… marriage. Wow. You kids aren’t screwing around. You’re getting your lives together. I just settled on my major last week, thought that was a big deal, but here you are stealing my thunder, not parting til death and throwing yourselves bachelor and bachelorette parties that I can’t even afford to attend. Oh and also, thanks for registering at Crate & Barrel; I can maybe afford to buy you a serving spoon or can opener.

In any case, I guess it’s not your fault, and I don’t exactly blame you… but you’re kind of bringing out the worst in me. You make me feel inadequate and kind of uncomfortable. And alone. And poor. Can you maybe just make an extra vow to some of your friends to not become the lame married couple? To stay fun and pleasant like you were when you were just boyfriend-and-girlfriend? To not make the rest of us feel awkward for being single, and to not judge us for our lack of awesomeness in relationships?

Thanks.

And again, mazel tov.

Love,

K

PS—If you want me in your bridal party, peach is not a color option.

[Photo courtesy of home.att.net]

Last night, though, this same good friend also got engaged to her boyfriend of two years. Um. Congratulations?

Yeah, yeah, so they’re in love, whatever. I get it.

I was in love once. I never actually talked to the guy, but it was there. I’m still a little baffled by her annoucement of love and commitment at such a tender age as 22. Maybe it’s me, but a lot of the time, I still feel 14. I just have so much to learn about myself before I can conceive of taking the black – and – white plunge.

And before she started dating her boyfriend — oops, i mean her fiance — my friend was right there with me, braiding my hair in the photobooth with an economy bag of fun – size Snickers and a stack of trashy magazines.

Now, she has the Big Job, the Big Ring, the Big Life, and I’m wondering what to do with all these issues of Jane and feeling like I should take the training wheels of my bike.

Is it just me, or does the prospect of marriage seem insane at this point in time? My own parents and grandparents were married at this age, but today things have loosened up a bit. Maybe it’s because we’re living longer, but I feel like forty is a good age for marriage — live half of your life single, half of it married. The way things are going, I’ll probably won’t feel forty until I’m sixty.

At least there is a potentially fun wedding to look foward to — now I that I don’t have to pay my older brother to steal me drinks.

Being that this was my first real wedding experience and I was a bridesmaid, I got to see what really goes on behind the scenes of a twenty-something wedding. I realized many things about love and relationships and the craziness that is planning for such an occasion.

Weddings are special because they allow you to bond with family, as you all witness together, the bond between husband and wife become sacred and, hopefully, one that actually sticks in the end.

But I was already aware of that mushy stuff much going into it, and, sure, I wanted to bring along my own special someone to share it with.What I didn’t know is just how much weddings make for fabulous places to party, meet members of the opposite sex and opportunities to better appreciate life as a single girl! Woohooo! Let’s make some memories, people.

I’ve heard many, many girls whine and complain about having to go to a wedding stag, dateless and alone. I was one of them. Most girls would rather be attacked by the plague than go to one of these things by themselves.

After all, at this point in life, you can’t find a more romantic date than a wedding. And just like back in the days of prom or any other function that involves the purchase of a new dress, as soon as a female hears about a potential wedding or opens an envelope to reveal that holy invitation, the first thing that pops into her mind is, “Oh my god, who will be my date!?! What if I don’t have a date? I’ll DIE, I’ll just DIE. Great. That’s it. My life is over. Thanks, Cindy and Mark. Thanks a lot.”

I’ll admit, before breaking up with my boyfriend of three years, I had every intention of bringing him to my brother’s wedding. But, alas, there I was, broken up – stag, dateless and alone, worrying about having to sit on the sidelines during slow songs at the reception and having no one to gaze at lovingly during the ceremony while I imagined my own wedding.

If you find yourself in a similar solitary position, do not fret. Once you accept the fact you’re going to a wedding without a date, realize that if you can get through this, you can get through anything….jump any hurdle….climb any mountain. Okay, maybe it’s not that extreme, but you’ll definitely be one step closer to becoming that strong, confident, Independent Woman…and maybe have a kick-ass time like I did, or even get some action while you’re there!

Based on my weekend wedding extravaganza, here are some factors to consider as you leave that guest box on the RSVP (don’t cry) unchecked:

The Open Bar. Wedding parties (well, good ones anyway) always have an open bar. Once you get a couple of drinks in your system, you’ll loosen up and love the fact that they are free drinks which won’t take any money out of your poor, college pockets. Make friends with the bartender. Become one with the bartender. Hang at the bar and skim the room for hotties who you will soon fearlessly hit on. Preferably, dateless hotties, as a wedding is no place for a cat fight.

The “Fast” Dancing. Seriously, I don’t think I’ve ever danced so much in my life than I did at my brother’s wedding, and it was sooo much fun. Why? Because I had nothing and no one holding me back, and no boy pouting about having to dance the Electric Slide, which, by the way, never gets old.

The people who dance at weddings are usually the ones who are the most fun there. The dancers mainly consist of (1) dorky family members with horrible yet hilarious moves and (2) the fun groomsmen and bridesmaids who love to drink and party. If you’re not a bridesmaid and you haven’t had a chance to get in with them or the groomsmen, get to know these people on the dance floor. Before you know it, you’ll be drunkenly doing the MC Hammer and loving every minute of it.

The “Slow” Dancing. Ahh, the slow dance. Either the best thing in the world or the worst. We’ve all been there: the beat slows down as everyone scrambles to find a partner. Some weddings only play a couple slow songs, and in my case, there were only two. During the first slow song, I sat at my chair and thought about getting back together with my ex, so that I would never be faced with this situation ever again. I thought I was done with this stuff back in high school!

But, during the second slow song, I found the courage to walk right over to the *very* cute and *very* single best man and I asked him to dance. If I hadn’t have been cutting it up with him during the fast songs, like Jessie’s Girl, I may never have bonded with him in the first place. I realized I had a lot more guts than I thought, and slow dancing with the guy I’d been eyeing all night was definitely a romantic highlight.

The Guys. Weddings are crawling with single guys. Men don’t really care about going to these things with dates, because a lot of them are just as happy hanging out with other guy friends in a totally heterosexual way.

So, you’ve been drinking, you’ve been dancing, you’re wearing a great, new, sexy dress and you’re single. Unlike all the coupled-up girls, you can chat up every boy in the whole damn place – take your pick! You may not have arrived at the wedding with a guy, but that doesn’t mean you can’t leave with one.

Date or no date, have fun at your next wedding experience. Relish in your singleness, because before you know it, you’ll be married and boring. And that husband of yours is just one more thing that may hold you back from dancing the awesome Electric Slide.