And they really like Sandra Bullock and Taylor Swift.

Is “The Notebook” going to Broadway?

Are you eating too fast?

Find the perfect hair color for you.

Bad news for Simon Cowell lovers.

Dress yourself 10 pounds thinner.

"Am I skinnier yet?"

Ah, weight loss: the subject that’s sold a thousand glossies. I just got finished reading People magazine’s latest “Half Their Size!” spread, a semi-regular feature that celebrates regular people who have shed an entire person’s worth of pounds. While their stories are certainly inspirational—at least, as long as you believe that those who are overweight are inherently worth less than people with low BMIs—the madness that surrounds the weight-loss industry is chock-full of bad advice for women.

It’s hard to focus on just one bad advice source here, since weight-loss tips are always a mix of the glaringly obvious (did you know that if you drink water instead of Mountain Dew and eat carrot sticks instead of bacon-wrapped candy bars, you’ll get thinner?) and the mind-numbingly ridiculous (try eating only these processed cookies! Try eating dinner for breakfast and breakfast for dinner! Try not eating!).

Even so, while perusing Good Housekeeping’s “30 Ways to Drop 5 Lbs …and keep it off for good,” I came across a few pieces of advice silly enough to make me slap my forehead with my palm and groan. For instance, here’s what the ladies at GH think you should do if you’re in the mood for something sweet:

“Try an almond stacked on top of a dried apricot — it tastes like a cookie. Really.”

Um… no. I’m not exactly a foodologist, but I’m pretty sure that this snack would taste like a nut on top of a dried piece of fruit. That is not the same thing as  an Oreo. Tell us to eat fruits and nuts all you want, Good Housekeeping—just don’t piss on us and then tell us it’s just raining.

And also, if you’re craving a cookie, why not just eat a cookie? As long as you don’t eat, like, twelve cookies, you should be fine, right? Again, I am not a licensed diet advice dispenser, so you should take my recommendations with a grain of salt. (Unless the lady mags have decreed that even a grain of salt is too much sodium.)

Then there’s this gem:

“Laugh Off 40 Calories! A study from Vanderbilt University showed that you can burn up to that many calories by laughing genuinely for 10 to 15 minutes. (Watch Groundhog Day to giggle off even more weight.)” Read More »

If there’s one thing I know about Americans, it’s that we’ve got our priorities straight. We choose McDonald’s over home-cooked meals, use plastic over paper (an attempt to “Go Green?”) and love fitting into our old jeans more than having sex.

Wait, what?

According to a poll of 2,200 women conducted by (who else?) Special K cereal, more than a quarter of women, 29.1 percent to be exact, said that “fitting into an old pair of jeans” would feel BETTER. THAN. SEX.

Let’s be honest here. I’m in college – I drink copious amounts of alcohol. I eat bad food..and a lot more of it than I should. I would love to be able to shed a few pounds and pull my high school pants over my muffin top. But, better than sex? I don’t know about that one. Maybe if I was somehow fitting into my leggings from middle school. Or that awesome 98 Degrees baby tee I picked up at a concert.

Other responses included 28.9% who said squeezing into those skinny jeans would “beat a promotion,” (being thin > being rich??) and one in ten who said it would “beat a marriage proposal.”

WTF?

Read More »

Who would’ve thought that being a gym bunny could be bad for your health? Sure, it takes a lot of time to work out too much, and you probably don’t have any time, but it is possible that those daily workouts are a bit too much for your body. Overexerting yourself can be easier than you think.

Most athletes, whether recreational or competitive, believe that running just a little longer or lifting weights just a little heavier during the next workout will be most beneficial to their bodies and, in most of our heads, best for our jean size. Working out daily isn’t the problem, nor is it normally bad for you, but working out too hard daily is when your body cries for help. Read More »

Adam Lambert is bigger than the Beatles?

Justin Timberlake and Jessica Biel are dunzo!

Germans stink in bed. Literally.

Privilege and the Ivy League.

What’s wrong with Tori Spelling?

Lip gloss that curbs your appetite? Hollerrrr.

With all the crazy diet fads, weight loss pills and general hysteria over how to shed extra weight, it’s no surprise when another completely ridiculous tactic comes out.

And I’m not talking “only eat bacon” ridiculous.

Allow me to introduce you to Dr. Nikolas Chugay’s mesh patch. When sewn onto the tongue it becomes so painful to eat, that you just can’t. That’s right this doctor from California who has a PhD in medicine is going to make it so painful for you to eat that you won’t have any other option but to stick to a liquid diet.

Ten women have already done it and – surprise, surprise – some have lost up to 20 pounds. (Really, if you don’t eat any solid food, you’ll lose weight? Who knew!)

Now if this guy has actually found women desperate enough to inflict physical pain on themselves to lose their muffin top, I think the world of medicine is ready to radically expand. Can you imagine how much money can be made inventing other completely unreasonable ways for women to keep their stomachs empty?

I have a couple of ideas already. Read More »

I have this theory that anything that’s good for the planet is good for your health as well.  You’ve heard it all before:  ditching the car, eating organic greens, and drinking tap water are all great ways to maintain your well-being.  But did you know that adding a little green to your workout routine can actually bump it its effectiveness and your subsequent sexiness?  Read on, my friend…

Treadmill vs. Trail: Treadmills use a lottt of energy – about 6 hours of lights on a Christmas tree-worth in only 30 minutes (obscure analogy, I know).  Running outside, however, requires no additional energy except for that needed to manufacture your workout clothes.  I don’t expect you to run outside just for the environment’s sake, but what if I told you that running outside can up your calorie burn and save your joints from strain and impact?  Not only are trails more likely to have inclines that torch calories like a wildfire, they also have a bumpier terrain which causes your muscles to make tiny corrective movements. All in all, this can increase your calorie burn by up to 10%!  Run on sand, and burn 1.6 times more calories!  Plus, dirt trails, wet and dry sand, and even asphalt (never run on the concrete sidewalk!) are softer than the surface of treadmills and will better protect your knees and ankles from impact and future joint pain.  Trust me, running in nature sure beats trotting alongside that 50 year old man sweating like a pig in his 1976 gym shorts. Read More »

I took a yoga class during my senior year of college. Somehow, the dingy and cramped gymnasium-esque room, ratty exercise mats and lingering body order stench kind of zapped the whole “zen” experience. But I still felt great when it was over and wanted more, more, more. However, with limited funds in college, the idea of joining a local studio was out of the question.

That’s why I’m obsessed with Yoga Month and knew you lovely readers would appreciate it as well. You can get a free week of yoga at participating studios across the country anytime during the month of September! I know there’s only a week left (I just found out about it myself!), so go here right now and search your zip code to find a location close to your campus.

Never tried yoga? Well then, this is the perfect opportunity to try it out for a week and see what you think. I mean, it does have just a few benefits: less stress (it can even change your gene response to stress!), boosted mood (and perhaps a cure for depression and anxiety) and better posture (it may even reverse that slumped over look that happens after hours of computer usage). And hey, if the body bonuses don’t do it for you…what about totally adorbs yoga gear like Lululemon (which is cuter/nicer than 90 percent of normal clothes I typically wore to class)? I’ll take any excuse to shop some sales.

Yoga Month is totally free, so why not?

I’ve resisted buying the iPhone for three reasons.

A) It’s freakin expensive.
B) EVERYONE has one and, well, I just don’t want to be like everyone else.
C) If my boss was to find out I have internet access at all times, she will think it’s OK to email me outside office hours.

But recently I spent hours, yes hours, playing with my friend’s iPhone: I visited FMyLife.com, I Facebook-stalked, I discovered there are health and fitness applications! It was the most fun I’ve ever had.

So before I bite the bullet and buy one of these suckers, I want to share my fave nutrition and fitness-related apps with you. Read More »

Despite all the diet mumbo jumbo that overwhelms women on a daily basis, weight loss is a rather simple formula: burn more calories than you eat. The end.

How do you burn those calories? Duh, you workout. You run, you swim, you blade, you work so hard your shirt is soaked with sweat and you smell like one of the guys asking you for money on your way to class. It’s brutal and it’s annoying, but you gotta do it if you don’t want all those late night pizza runs to stick to your booty.

But a new study from LSU has proven that exercise may not help us lose weight after all. In fact, what it does do is make us all hungrier so we end up consuming all those calories we just worked so hard to burn…and end up with the same results we would have had if we had simply stayed home and watched Real World Cancun on the couch. Read More »