The “hand washing police” (creepy!) have decided that men are grosser than women.

During a meeting last Monday for infectious disease scientists, “researchers who spy on people in public bathrooms” (double creepy!) released a study that showed men have issues when it comes to washing their hands after using public toilets.

“One-third of men didn’t bother to wash after using the bathroom, compared with 12 percent of women” the researchers claimed, basing their findings on over 6,000 people in four big cities.

A spokesman from a co-sponsor of the survey, the Soap and Detergent Association (seriously?), urged men to “step up to the sink”, after holding their weewees at a urinal or taking a dump.

Because women are forced to frequent stalls all the time, we’re probably a lot more likely to realize just how dirty a public bathroom can get—although holding one’s penis and then shaking a stranger’s hand screams ‘unsanitary!’ just as loudly.

So, what is it? Is pee just considered not as dirty to men? Do they simply not care about poo contamination?

Are men really just really f*cking gross most of the time? Read More »

Ladies, take note: the magazine that we love to hate, Cosmopolitan, is touting the sex trend du jour. It seems that gray-rape is the new date rape!

What is gray-rape? It’s the type of rape that happens after you protest having sex with someone but they go ahead anyway after you black out after one too many Smirnoff shots and cheep beer at your local frat’s beer pong competition.

Sigh. Who knew I would yearn for the days that Cosmo published articles that merely warned us that we are most likely to get attacked and raped in the summertime because of flimsy outfits?

Until winter rolls around, when we’re most vulnerable because we’re less on guard, or something. And on vacation, because we leave our inhibitions and tasers at the door.

Oh, and on any old day, coming home from work, because we’re less paranoid of attackers lurking in the bushes when we’re close to home.

And now they’re telling us we have not-quite-rape to worry about?

I don’t know about you, but I think that saying “no” and promptly passing out sends a pretty clear message: “Even if I wanted to sleep with you, which I don’t, I would not be physically able to participate in intercourse as evidenced by the fact that I am not awake for it.” Read More »

I must have been out of town when this memo was passed around, so perhaps someone can clue me in. When did “feminist” become a four letter word?

I noticed this first earlier this summer, while reading “The Feminine Mystique” by Betty Friedan. My book began to cower in fear any time I attempted to take it out of my purse to do some reading public. While people can openly read Harry Potter books and trashy romance novels, my book was met with hostility.

“Why are you reading that trash?” my cousin scowled.

“What are you, becoming some kind of feminist?” a friend of mine asked, while I did some pool-side reading.

I thought to myself, if I had been reading a book about civil rights and the end of slavery, I wouldn’t get a second glance. But a book about feminism, one that applies to over half of our population, apparently offends people. Read More »

As many new Freshmen begin packing up for orientation, nervous parents everywhere are worrying about their safety. How will my daughter protect herself from those occasional college crazies?

They think to themselves, “How can I be sure she’ll be safe when she walks back to her dorm at 2 A.M?”

Well, girls, if you’ve got parents like these, tell them to relax. Because I’ve got just the thing that will keep you protected—and stylish at the same time.

Taser International has just unveiled it’s newest, 50,000 volt hand-held stun gun that not only renders a subject incapable of brain function for a few minutes, but comes in cute colors like “metallic pink”, “electric blue”, “titanium silver” and “black pearl”. Read More »

Back when I was much younger, say 7th grade or so, I had a horrible relationship with my weight. We’re talking abusive. It wasn’t pretty.

These days, I tend to think I’m much better. A little critical, maybe, but what 24-year-old women isn’t? I certainly don’t really restrict myself, and try to eat everything in moderation (with a cupcake here and there) while working out a few times a week.

But according to this test, I’m still sorta weight obsessed.

While I’m not sure if a little online quiz can really diagnose a person, it was interesting to see what my knee-jerk reactions to some of the questions were.

As easygoing as I’d like to think I am about myself, I still tend to have a negative reaction when it comes to my weight. I can be judgmental of myself, and don’t take compliments very well at all.

I guess I’m still a work in progress.

Either that, or this quiz was totally harsh. Answer the questions, let me know what you think; accurate portrayal of your psyche, or severe take on a common female issue? Read More »

Have you ever thought to yourself, “gee, my boyfriend is being an ass. I sure wish I could punch him in the face without getting arrested”?Well, now you can. And if he wants, he can punch back.

According to the New York Times, young couples are beginning to get into the boxing ring together, sparring against each other for exercise and respect. While most men don’t jab back (or jab very lightly), women are routinely allowed and encouraged to beat the crap out of their mate. Read More »

Getting hit on can be one of two things; slightly flattering and fun, or completely disgusting and oh-so incredibly lame. In my experience, being hit on by lesbians is an occurrence almost totally devoid of the latter.

I’m sure some of you have lesbian pick-up horror stories (or fantasies, whatever the case may be), but whenever I’ve been the attempted pick-up-ee by another woman, I have felt neither the grossed out shivers or the latent uncomfortableness that often accompanies the male pick-up.

For one thing, women always start a conversation first, asking a question, asking a name, instead of going right for the proverbial jugular of “you’re hot, can I buy you a drink?” Easing into things allows both parties to feel like they’re actually talking, rather than diving headfirst into a mating ritual. Read More »

Why do people have sex? Seems about as obvious as Ms. Star Jones having weight loss surgery, but apparently it is not.

In a recent study published in Archives of Sexual Behavior (I don’t read it; I swear. I actually saw this study on the Today Show), 2,000 people were asked why they had sex.

The answer? Well, surprisingly, there were more than one. 237 reasons, to be exact.

The top three most popular responses for both men and women seemed the most obvious:

1. They were attracted to the person

2. They wanted to experience physical pleasure

3. “It feels good”

The other 234 reasons were random, interesting and – sometimes – scary.

Some included: to burn calories, for revenge, to make babies, to get closer to the person, to get closer to God and to pass STDs onto someone else (yikes!). Read More »

Admit it — you’ve used your best baby voice to get what you want. The baby voice is a lethal weapon.

When used on family members, it conjures images of you as a helpless young one that they cannot resist bending to.

For everyone else, it’s creepy and annoying and they comply to whatever your sugar – throated wishes are just so you’ll shut up.

According to some recent reports on jezebel.com, salon.com, and in The Washington Post, the baby voice is presenting some problems for women in an unlikely place — at work.

It’s pretty easy to see where this trend’s force is coming from: the great female role models of our day, Paris, Lindsay, Britney, et al. Read More »

The woman has spoken. In response to the “40 Things Men do Wrong in the Bedroom” I found last week, an incredibly insightful and hilarious female blogger has posted a response.

Before reading it I thought to myself, “Um, I do nothing wrong in the bedroom…I am a freak in the sheets.” Turns out even I – a self proclaimed Sex Goddess (who has had very few complaints) – have a few bedroom shortcomings.

I will be honest: it is hard to read a list like this and realize that many of the items on the list (mainly, #9) apply to you. I mean, I have been performing number nines for years and never had complaints. I have, embarrassingly enough, had a few suitors do the old head grab. I got offended. Instead I should have gotten a little more crafty with my moves. And incorporated my hands a little more. And practiced some kama sutra or something… Read More »