Ankle Bracelets Are The New Black

Anklets are the new black. In fact they are black, bulky and high tech enough to monitor your alcohol intake while strolling down Hollywood Blvd. Lindsay Lohan has chosen to sport hers with cut off jean shorts while prior trendsetters Michelle Rodriguez, Tracy Morgan and Eve have all worn a variety of red carpet ensembles framed around ankle bracelet chic.

After Lohan got into a drunken strung out car crash just a little over a month ago a gram of cocaine was found in her glove compartment finally affirming what everyone already knew: Lindsay Lohan does drugs. How convenient that an alcohol monitoring bracelet can in fact only detect alcohol

go figure.

But on the plus side for Lindz, it has no way to trace cocaine binges, ecstasy filled weekends or some top of the line gangah. Although not drinking keeps a belligerent Lindsay off the long and winding Hollywood roads she has now been let loose on the club scene once again but this time she really is holding a red bull.

Now 21 the former child star can’t seem to rid herself of scandal and intrigue.

With hacked MySpaces, paparazzi brigades and whacked out parents Lindsay is our favorite bad girl that we never thought was good. Gone are the days of Britney proclaiming “Oops I did it again”, this is the dawning of the “I did it again, and what?” age which was ignited by a pack of Hollywood socialites self destructing all at once but look absolutely fabulous while going down. Jailed, pregnant, drug overdosed, rehabbed with cases pending, divorced with two babies and a shaved head. No it’s not this seasons Jerry Springer line up it’s how Paris Hilton, Nicole Richie, Mischa Barton, Lindsay Lohan and Britney Spears spent their summer.

The sad part is that these ultra rich ultra powerful girls have no guidance or support, just a check book and limitless possibilities. When alcohol monitoring bracelets become a fashion statement is all hope lost? We hope not but in the meantime you can get your black monitoring anklet for free at a county courthouse near you.

— Theresa Bennett

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