Life Changing Sex: The One Night Stand That Rocked

Taking someone home from the bar when I was still in school was a fairly normal occurrence. Just like drinking in the bathroom while I got ready, or dance parties with my roommates before heading out to the bar, finding a man for some late night fun was always a given when going out.
The entire situation was bittersweet, really. I would put on my sexiest top of the day (which was ever-changing with a weekly run to Forever 21), smoke out my eyes, throw back a few cocktails and look for a guy to make out with in the corner. Once I set my sights on someone, I would work them until I had them hooked then toss em in a cab and go on home.
I made myself believe that it was all fun and games; that everyone needed a little action sometimes and I was just fulfilling that need. But the truth was the only thing being fulfilled was my self esteem. Finding a guy was not about having an orgasm (or trying….so hard….with some of the guys I managed to bring back), but about the high of knowing someone found me sexually attractive. That high, like most, would wear off soon after the boy of the evening left, without so much as passing me his number.
The morning-after low would then set in; I began questioning if he found me sexy or if he was just drunk, if he regretted anything in the morning, and why I could never find anyone who would want to stick around. Then I would do the whole thing over again the following night.
Once I left college and realized that taking men home from the bar was not the safest idea in the world, I also realized that it wasn’t the best for my mental health either. I started going out and focusing on having a good time with my friends rather than judging the success of an evening based on whether or not I went home alone.
But a few months ago I relapsed. I saw a hot guy at the bar – you know, the kind that everyone in the room is watching and you know is way out of your league so you just admire him from afar. Before I knew it, he was flirting with me and the next thing I knew I was curled up in his bed after a wild sexathon. As I drove home from his place – bra in hand – I felt good. Really good.
Unlike all those times before, this particular situation made me feel powerful and sexier than I had ever felt in my life. My self confidence exploded and I realized that I was a lot better than I was giving myself credit for; that I could get a lot better than I thought I was capable of. I am sure that self confidence stemming from a night of (hot) passionate sex isn’t the healthiest thing in the world, but it happened. And it has changed my outlook on everything.
I know it sounds crazy, but my one-night-stand sorta changed my life.

A Girl’s Guide to Recessions (Part 1)
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